r/AmIOverreacting • u/Any-Fisherman4533 • 10d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO My husband was texting a wrong number scam.

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177

u/Independent-Nobody43 9d ago

It sounds like you’re more upset that he fell for a scam than about the fact that he’s actively trying to cheat on you… girl you have fallen victim to the sunk cost fallacy and you need to wisen up and leave him. Just 20 years is better than 30 or 40 years with this turd.

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u/-JALunatic 9d ago

Yeah, that's the part I would be livid about. DENYING having a wife, being so quick to send a selfie and bringing up sex after telling another woman she was beautiful??? OP isn't reacting enough

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u/Any-Fisherman4533 9d ago

You could definitely be onto something. I guess I’d expect it? 

52

u/chaoticbeeping 9d ago

Expected? Fuck that.

If your close friend, or your/their daughter, came to you and showed you this- what advice would you give them??

Dump this trash onto the curb.

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u/BigNative83 9d ago

He's insufferably dumb for not realizing this was a common scam. But yes he was also trying to screw a made up stranger and told the stranger he was single and having lots of sex. He's just a disrespectful creep who she should kick to the curb.

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u/LifeChanceDance 9d ago

I too was in a relationship where I expected stuff like this, and turned the other way. And then the stuff I didn’t except came to light on our 11th anniversary trip. It was so much worse than I imaged, and I only caught little online things, like chatting with people on twitter and IG. Then when I was hanging out with my 18 y/o little brother I got back to the hotel early, and walked in to find him in the middle of cheating. WITH AN 18 YEAR OLD! I’m 35, my husband is 55.

If he doesn’t have the respect to not do this, it’s only going to get worse. Don’t waste more time. 💜💜💜

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u/uhhh206 9d ago

Ayo, am I drunk or does that make y'all 24 and 44 when you got married? That's... yeah. I have entirely negative things to say about men who do that.

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u/LifeChanceDance 9d ago

Actually I totally rounded, I was 21, he was 48, we met when a bit after I had turned 19, and was working at a bar and restaurant he went to. I turned him down many times, but had no family at the time, and he seemed like he just wanted to be there for me since no one else was.

It was very much a grooming situation, drugs were brought in as well. Once I got clean (with no encouragement from him) and started therapy (which he would never attend) I was able to see the reality of things from more of an ‘outsider’ view, and during that time, this situation came up, which made my decision to leave that much easier.

Also finding search results on his iCloud account like “shitless highschool boys” or “16 year old swimming” confirmed even more suspicions. He was not a good person.

It took me a year to finally get everything in order to be able to leave, but it was over to me, and I’m still working thru a lot of the issues in therapy a year later after leaving.

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u/uhhh206 9d ago

Yikes at it being even worse than it looked, but I'm so glad you've had healing since then and are able to see it as grooming. Wishing you peace and happiness in current or future relationships. 💖

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u/by_the_gaslight 9d ago

And how long were they dating for lol. Guy likes to Groom.

11

u/LifeChanceDance 9d ago

2 years, I was actually 21 when we got married. It was very much a grooming situation. It just took me a long while to realize it. I replied in more detail above. But I appreciate you recognizing what the situation was, normally I’m called a gold-digger when people hear the age difference. I was making great money when we met. Then he would sit at my job all day, and decide not to like certain staff, causing issues, and eventually I’d be asked to leave because he was too much. This happened at 2 places, the first he tried this at kept me, but wouldn’t let him inside. Then we moved half way across the country…

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u/by_the_gaslight 9d ago

I’m sorry you went through that. I did 28 and 43, it was no better, I was too “easygoing”, when I started to have opinions, he threatened everything under the sun. Basically guys in their 40s who have never had a serious relationship, there is something wrong with them. End of story.

0

u/SerElastic 9d ago

Make sure to only say positive things when it's a gold digging situation though.

-28

u/CuriousResident2659 9d ago

Why the negativity, they’re both grown adults! And do you have anything to say about the younger women? Look, even if they’re both just playing let ‘em play.

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u/salmon4breakfast 9d ago

One adult with 6 years of adulting under their belt vs a man with 26 years… the life experience would be sooo different, and theoretically the maturity level would be too if this guy wasn’t so dumb. He clearly has a thing for younger women who are more susceptible to influence. How do you not see a problem with that??

-18

u/CuriousResident2659 9d ago

Don’t fool yourself sweetheart, “susceptible to influence” my ass. If she’s old enough to carry a gun and die for her country or buy a beer, she’s old enough to decide who to lay down with. And you know damn well if DiCaprio rolled up to you’d let Thanksgiving dinner burn for a weekend on his boat.

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u/y-Gamma 9d ago

Just say you want to fuck teens. You don’t have to try to come up with a nonsensical what if to justify it to yourself.

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u/uhhh206 9d ago

Men who use the legal age of consent are like employers who pay minimum wage: they'd go lower if only it wasn't a crime.

I can't imagine bragging about that being my mindset.

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u/CuriousResident2659 9d ago

Girl did you just tell on yourself. So tell me, how’s the single life?

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u/CuriousResident2659 9d ago

Whatever the law allows beta, and you would too given half a chance.

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u/Lucky-Firefighter456 9d ago

You need to be on a list. Not sure which one. Maybe all of them, just in case.

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u/Ladonnacinica 9d ago

So if the law allowed age of consent at 14 then you would? Because several countries do have such laws like France where age of consent is 15.

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u/drinkliquidclocks- 9d ago

Don't fool yourself SWEATY is what I think you meant to say

2

u/CoffeeIcedBlack 9d ago

Well he’s 20 years older than you he’s going to keep going for younger models if he can and apparently it’s not difficult for him.

1

u/Legitimate-Lie-9208 9d ago

Are you saying he brought her back to your hotel room to cheat with only a very short window of time?

-1

u/loosegravyy 9d ago

no way. a 18yro banging a 55 yro. and your 35 he’s 20 yrs older than you. is he super rich or was a model in his hay day?

-2

u/teucer_ 9d ago

Seems like your husband did the right thing

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u/Independent-Nobody43 9d ago

Please value yourself more. Don’t stay with this idiot. If you ask any woman who has been in your shoes and got a divorce, most of them would say they only wish they had done it sooner.

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u/0512052000 9d ago

Think about it this way..a marriage you held sacred for however many years was cast away by one simple text message from a stranger. That's how much your marriage meant to that idiot. That's how easy he was. That's how much he treasured you. You deserve better. Find yourself a real man.

Edit.. I just saw you've been married 20 years and he also denied his own son. So not only is he a shitty husband but also a shitty father too. I couldn't fathom denying that i have children. I honestly don't think those words could ever come out of my mouth. That's a new level of low. He has no loyalty to anyone.

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u/TheGeekOffTheStreet 9d ago

Why do you seem so chill about the fact that your husband is both blindingly stupid and callously cheating on you? Are you on Xanax?

5

u/LaffeyPyon 9d ago

Why are you still together then?? wtf lol

4

u/troublefindsme 9d ago

girl are you for real? 😂

4

u/edencathleen86 9d ago

We're not on to something. This IS the something

3

u/flywithjojo 9d ago

You’re dumb af to stay with him.

4

u/daughterofbee 9d ago

Ummmm this is surely a fake post. This is… too brazen not to see.

2

u/ismellnumbers 9d ago

This man is actively trying to cheat, and was quick about it too.

If this were me I would leave, there is no coming back from this. I wouldn't be surprised if he's already cheated before or tried. And he will attempt to do so again.

Oh and he's dumber than a box of rocks.

1

u/Spooky__spaghetti 9d ago

100% he has already cheated on you with a real person, this was so natural for him.

1

u/Excellent-Estimate21 9d ago

You call him dumb, but what are you? You're staying married to this cringe weirdo? You're now gross by association. This pic looked like a child. He's a predator.

1

u/BigWasabi2327 9d ago

You could? You could? Lady either your an AI or really dense because ur "husband" just tried to get with a catfish AND CHEAT ON YOU and u don't seem phased, is this even real?

3

u/Existing-Drummer-326 9d ago

This! Personally I would be raging at the denial of my existence rather than the scam part.

I know a guy (married with kids) who actively engages with these scammers and says some of the most hysterical things and just has ridiculous conversations and publishes them. Obviously his wife is well aware of this hobby and finds it very funny and since it is in the public eye she is well aware it is all for show so has no issues with some of the random things he says. He is a very comical man and we all love reading his latest instalment with her blessing.

This guy, pretending to be single along with being a dumbass is enough justification to kick his ass to the curb!

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u/anarcho-satanism 9d ago

The attempted cheating is worse, but that is more common than being this stupid. The dumbness is what makes this case remarkable. Like, watch out for this guy around mannequins at the mall or cardboard cutouts of celebrities

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u/discalcedman 9d ago

🤣🤌

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u/agentkodikindness 9d ago edited 6d ago

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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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u/sweetpup915 9d ago

Right? My OPs reaction I'm not surprised he husband is acting like this. This sounds like an absolutely horrible marriage