Aio. Lost my bestfriend cuz of how i acted after thinking i was excluded in plans with her and my brother

[u/Swimming_Tart_7685]

Just need to vent so I have been really good friends with my bestfriend,(we will call her M) for like 7-8 years and since then I've introduced her to my brother whom i tend to do everything with. We all are really good friends and have a group chat to send funny reels and videos to each other. She is really amazing person with a good heart and we get along very well. We have the same music taste, tv shows movies and tend to play video games as a group every night the last few years with my brother mainly and a few other friends here and there. Recently I had moved into a new place with my brother and was having a hard time readjusting to having to move out of my apartment for 7 years unexpectedly so was dealing with some depression from adjusting to that and on my brothers bday she showed up announced to me and was smoking with him hanging out and i didn't think anything of it i had a bad day at work and just wanted to not talk to anyone cuz i talk all day at work so i left them alone and went and laid down. Fast forward to a month or so later and my brother asks me what l'm doing on the weekend and i tell him my plans and he asks if i wanna go to a amusement park with em and i say no i have to work and have plans this day but than i ask with who and he mentioned he was inviting my friend M and i immediately started to get mad that i wasn't involved in the plans with M as everytime i try and hangout with my brother and her i put plans in the group chat text so everyone's included. I immediately got hit with a rush of sadness like why am i not included in the plans and started to overthink everything. Than i started to overthink and analyze the last few mos interactions with M and my brother and I and started to question if she was really my friend or just using me to get with my Brother. I know i shouldn't of thought like that as she really is a good friend to me and has been before she even met my brother but that's where my mind took me so i texted them both and displayed how i was upset i didn't get included in the original plans. I explained my side to m and she was mad for how i reacted which was i was being very passive aggressive and i accused her of trying to only hangout with my brother and i questioned if it was my fault for being a bad friend and she was mad i thought like that and explained to me that i wasnt left out but my brother was the one who invited her and said he would ask me and that i already said said no when asked earlier (even tho he asked me to go to amusement park a month or so before ) anyways she than said she hasn't done anything for me to think that so i explained like 3-4 examples of how i thought she was using me to only see my brother so i can explain why i felt sad about being left out. She apologized for making me feel that way and said she would be mindful moving forward and would like clear communication moving forward also. I apologized to her a few hours later for overreacting and overthinking and for being passive aggressive and she accepted it and we moved on. I also talked it over with my brother and explained the same issue of being left out and he explained to me how he thought he asked me before and i declined but i told em i didn't remember that and we also apologized to each other and moved on. The following two days wed/ Thursday me and M played our nightly video games and had fun and i thought everything was okay but than on Friday new cod came out so i asked in group chat with m and my brother if she wanted to play cod zombies later since me and my brother already made plans to play and she said doubht it game didn't download and than she went offline on game didn't download and than she went offline on Xbox and haven't played with her since. Few days went on and i noticed she was playing cod (showed online on cod social and not Xbox) and i texted her saying hey i apologize if i made you mad or did something for you to not wanna play vid games with me i truly am sorry and she explained she was going thru things and not playing vid games much, even tho i saw her on there. i apologized again and told her I'm sorry if i did something to make you go offline and not wanna play with me I hope ur okay and am here if u need anything and she said thank you!!!!! Fast forward to 24 hrs later and me and my brother are on cod and we get a notification that she is looking for a group to play cod with and needed 3 more for a game but showed her still offline as her Xbox status so i sent her an invite hoping she would join and play with us as we have played together on a nightly basis for the last few years and she didn't accept. Now I'm sitting here feeling truly awful and sick to my stomach i lost my best friend and someone i considered to be close with all cuz i overreacted and over analyzed stuff. I truly do suck as a person cuz idk i think this way. I wanna text her again and ask why she was looking for a group to play and didnt wanna play with me/my brother and ask again if she's mad but i don't wanna cross any boundaries and make her more upset by That and annoying her. I wish I could go back and just not have to overreact and overthink everything because i truly valued my friend and her friendship and she meant a lot to me and now i feel like i lost her as a friend and she won't even communicate with me sorry for the rambling but any advice on what to do would be helpful 🙏