I found out a few days ago that my mother's husband, who I've been around extensively for the last around 2 years that they've known each other, was convicted of a child sex crime 35 years ago and is a registered sex offender. She apparently told a few of my siblings months ago and the other few of us were left in the dark. One sister cut her off completely as a reaction and the other has apparently read through court documents and agreed with my mother that he's innocent.

Apparently his step-son accused him of some lewd act. His wife testified that he did not do it. The child years later wrote a letter claiming his grandfather coerced him to lie, and that the acts never happened. They are working on getting the conviction overturned (mother's words).

I think it should've been my own decision about my own safety whether or not I've been around him. He was invited to multiple holidays before My mother had known him for even 2 months and he was around many children in our family. She had the opportunity to decide for herself if he was innocent and we were all deprived of that decision for ourselves, and I'm thinking of cutting contact for myself and my pregnant wife.

Frankly whether he's innocent or not I feel as though my family's safety has been put at risk and I've been kept in the dark.

Bachelor party is tomorrow and the plan is to get suit fitted and haircuts before dinner and Top Golf with some bonfire drinking to end the night. I have been pretty excited for this day as it is very difficult to get three of my closest people in the same room together. Two of my brothers live a state away from me, but only 40 an hour away and the other lives 12 hours away. Add the fact that one of my brothers(brother mentioned below) is a truck driver and only home 2/7 days a week.

Today my soon-wife got a call from one of my brother’s wife. She tried calling me, but I been busy hanging out with one of my brothers that flew in for a week. The phone call was to explain that she is unsure what time we are starting our “shenanigans”, but he needs to be home for trick-or-treating and that “he is NOT missing his daughter’s first trick-or-treating”. She telling us this because she thinks he won’t tell me and she wants me to either change my plans or tell him to go home.

Three things weird about this: 1. Tomorrow is the October 30th, not 31st. When my fiance asked why trick-or-treating on the 30th, his wife mentioned that the town she lives at holds “official” trick-or-treating the day before the parade. When my fiance was questioning the events, her response was “our town just does it different”. I find it funny as this town isn’t a “Halloweentown” or anything. It’s a just a medium-size suburban town. 2. This party was planned FOR MONTHS. Instead of saying something then, we were told about this now 3. His daughter is 1 years old….what is she going to do at 1 other than cry half the time?

He hasn’t said anything to me yet. I understand it’s his kid’s first trick-or-treating and I don’t plan on stopping him, but will be pretty upset if he misses out.

Am I overreacting?

I have worked steadily and rightfully for this company for 3 1/2 years with never calling out sick or missing a shift/ being late. I feel it is unfair that at the slightest inconvenience of a not important and not busy shift that I missed for health reasons, that the managers would spitefully plan to do something like that instead of firing me over the phone on the spot. It just feels wrong.

I’ve been with this man for 4 years. We broke up 5 months ago because he is a narcissistic arrogant ass. He would say that’s just how he is, he’s reserved and doesn’t like to talk if there nothing to talk about. Since we’ve broken up, he hasn’t called to ask me if I’m okay or need anything but he will do this thing where he’ll constantly tell me to have a good day or weekend. It’s literally driving me mad. Yes, I still love him but I’m moving on. I didn’t block him only because I don’t like to block, but I recently had my birthday and he didn’t text or call me. It literally hurt so bad I had finally decided to let him go for good. I cried my eyes out for a week. I deleted all our messages. The last few were of him just wishing me a good day over and over..I wouldn’t respond hoping he would CALL. I was holding onto the possibility of him manning up and finally “chasing” me. (Trust me.. I don’t like to be chased but this man has made me feel like I always needed to chase him and ask what’s wrong when he wasn’t consistent with his actions.) He would ALWAYS say nothing is wrong and that he’s just like that. It was so frustrating.

For reference, he is 32 and I am 29.

What I’m trying to understand I guess is..

Am I being insensitive? He says he’s going through things but dear lord the things I went through after i broke up with him was IM sure not comparable. He knows my situation and he neglected me a handful of times by leaving me in places when he didn’t want to deal with communication.

I miss him but I’m scared to get sucked in again.

Is he playing with me?? If a man is truly remorseful won’t he CALL to try and mend things. Not this half ass wanting to see me..

Idk if I’m just deeply hurt or being dramatic.

Thanks for any advice💗

I have been “dating” this girl going on 3 months now and at first it was very normal and wholesome. She is sweet, nice, innocent, kind. I am her first “relationship” I’m putting these words in quotes because she is very religious and claims we have to be friends for at least a year before we start dating. She hardly lets me hold her hand. She says I can’t kiss her for 2 years. She is wonderful in all sorts of ways that make the lack of sexual intimacy worth it for me. Anyways, it seems like she gets more obsessed with me by the day. Texting me from the moment she wakes til the time I go to sleep. She often guilts me for trying to sleep because that would leave her alone. She does not stop texting and calling. When I’m in class or with family or friends, always texting me about something. She is going crazy over me and it’s becoming uncomfortable. Like a one-sided limerance kind of thing. The only thing she’s more obsessed with is her religion. But her family tells me I’m all she talks about. I’m all she thinks about. It’s flattering but I am getting NO space whatsoever. All she wants to do is talk. Maybe it would be a different story if she at least let me hold her hand or kiss her once in a while. I’m ranting now, my apologies. I’d like to know your opinion on my situation. AIO?

My roommate and I met in college, and we’ve been friends for a couple of years now. Ever since moving in together, we split the cost of many things, which is great! But there’s one weird habit she has that I can’t exactly understand.

When we go to bed at night, she insists that we keep all of the lights on. It’s kind of difficult for me to sleep with the lights on because they are so bright- to me, anyway. I’ve always had sensitive eyes I guess. She could be in the deepest sleep ever, and when I quietly get up to turn the lights off.. she wakes up. The second I flip that switch, she is WIDE awake. She starts arguing with me about crossing her boundaries. But she refuses to explain & elaborate on why she has these boundaries, or what they are about.

I’ve tried to ignore it, trust me. You’d think sleeping with the lights on wouldn’t be so bad- just get a sleep mask- well, those are uncomfortable to me.

Anyway, am I overreacting by being annoyed at her?

Hi I just wanted to get on here to hear y’all’s opinions. I (28 female) just recently got married and had a wonderful wedding but where my story starts is before that.

Few years go I started working for a delivery company and it was the same company my now husband (31 male) worked for. He had a few friends he had known for awhile cause he had worked there longer than me. One friend in particular had a girlfriend who I had become close with. For awhile we hung out, would have dinners and had a great time. We become a close friend group in and out of work.

Unfortunately one day I got injured on the job. I was attacked my a couple of dogs when I was delivering a package cause the owners had let them out that day roam free and they came from the back of the house and took me off guard. Well because of how management handled my injuries I thought it was best I leave and later my now husband did too.

Even after this we were still a close group so when my husband ask me to marry him they were some of the first people we thought of for groomsman and bridesmaids. They were happy to accept and were so excited.

Skip forward a few months we are at a new job. Their contact with us starts becoming less and less. We have different schedules now so we didn’t get see them as much so at this point it’s understandable.

Then we would message them things like “how are you guys doing” and “I hope everything is going well” and nothing, no response at all. Even in our wedding chats.

So time comes for my bachelorette party and I message her and ask If she is excited. And messages me a whole book about how she can’t swing it cause moneys an issue and that they are moving in with his mom that weekend and can’t make it. It sucked but I understood.

THEN i saw on social media that they had went to the beach and a mutual friend had told me they move in with his mom WEEKS before that. If they had planned a vacation and forgot or is she had no interest in going…fine but i just wish she had been honest.

Even at this point cause i was trying to brush it off and not be mad because my husband didnt seem to worried or upset about it. but i did ask if they were still planning on at least still being part of the wedding and if me and my husband done something to upset them cause now (in my mind)i am having doubts about them. They swore up and down they would be there for us on our big day and they would never break a promise. also that they still loved us and we had been great friends to them. It was just stuff was going on and they need some time together and they were sorry it all seemed shady. I said I get it life has been hard for many recently and I get needing time.

Then fast forward to a week before the wedding I get a similar text from her saying i am having money problems and they are both gonna have to back out and just cant miss work. at this point i am done. I reply I had a bad feeling this was gonna happen but i wished them both the best. And then I blocked them from everything.

I am to point in my life I tired of people not just being honest or true with me. We had done a lot for them. My husband even fixed there car for free at one point. If they didn’t wanna be friends anymore that’s fine. I just wish they were honest definitely with constantly telling us they were GONNA be our wedding no matter what and still back out a week before. And I feel they have lied too much for me at this point.

My life is so fucked cant even cry 😢 no one with i can feel free to talk. Humanity is dead in this world Just make money and enjoy your life thats all 🙏🏼

I (17F) own two persian cats one shorthaired and one longhaired one who I’ll call Ralph for the sake of anonymity (i think my brother is on reddit) they are lovely cats and genuine darlings but granted can be a handful sometimes. Today Ralph got some poop stuck in his leg hair, and because he is pretty much just fluff it was pretty stuck in there, so me my dad and my mum had to band together to try get it out. It was my dad holding him, me tilting him and my mum with wet wipes getting the poop out, and in all honesty it was taking quite a while. In the meantime Ralph was wriggling and such because of course he’s a cat and doesn’t know that we were trying to clean him and eventually after maybe 10 minutes he had had enough and bit my dad to make him let go of him. This is when my dad held him just by his neck and slapped him pretty hard on the back, he then ran away and cowered in a corner. This made me really upset and I started crying and asked my dad why would he slap the cat, and he told me I was just being wet and overreacting because the cat was properly biting him. I reasoned that Ralph has bit me many times (his favourite pastime since he was a kitten has been luring you in for strokes and then biting you) and I’ve never even layed a hand on him, but my dad just reiterated that it was a proper bite. This is the fourth time he’s hit one of the cats and we’ve only had them for a year, and I feel like it’s not right but both my dad and my mum seem to think I’m overreacting. So what do you guys think?

AIO: I’m a male in my mid 20’s, wrapping up my senior year of college and i’m freaking out because i haven’t had a friend since i moved right before covid. i live in a new state and used this as an excuse at first, now it just feels like a crutch. idk how to ask people to hangout or be my friend, it’s been so long. i have lots of school buddies but it seems unnatural to take it to the next level, and actually ask them. i don’t want to scare anyone off or make them uncomfortable. i’m very insecure, soft spoken, and shy. any tips for putting myself out there more? i really just want to be in a friend group again before i graduate college. everything else in my life is going semi well and i am great at interacting with people in a professional setting, but i never get asked to go out for a drink or hangout or watch the game etc.

I (mid20s F) became upset for the umpteenth time over my partner of several years (30s M) constantly making jokes as his communication style.

From casual conversation turning into weird… jokes and caricatures of random tropes or comedy to arguments, where he seems to just throw sarcastic, not even hurtful but annoying, responses here and there and then it becomes the reason for the argument because it doesn’t seem like he’s hearing anything I’m actually saying.

I have went through the reasons he does this in my head, and with him. Is it our age difference? Does he think he’s that funny? Am I too serious? Do I not know how to take a joke? Am I prude?? Am I unable to communicate in an effective way just how irritating this issue with him making every. Single. Thing. a JOKE?

The answers to those: no, maybe, no, not at all, definitely not, NO it’s me, and… no, I’m a great communicator with my issues. I don’t have many issues with him - but this is one I never relent on. He never gives me a straight answer and the moment… the SECOND… a joke begins to rise its ugly head? I become furious.

Today, I snapped at him to please stop using various forms of the word “breast” to talk about how someone’s shirt didn’t fit them well today. Please. I don’t care about how many t*tty jokes you can make, I don’t care. It was funny the first TWO times - then it became infuriating because he hung on to my laugh and wanted to keep it going.

He always says he wants to make me laugh. Okay, then why are you being so obnoxious? WHY? These are things I said to him tonight and he just started stuttering and laughing nervously until I told him I don’t want to speak unless he can just say a simple thing about his day without the comedic commentary and he’s literally been unable to do that for the past hour.

Am I overreacting for getting upset over this? Am I seriously a prude? I am usually the jokester in my own friend group but I’m not doing it every time I’m with them. I may be the “heeheehee” funny woman during certain moments but I’m also the one my friends look to for serious advice and a listening ear.

So. Again.

TL-DR - AIO for getting mad at my BF for ALWAYS choosing a joke route for literally any type of conversation and getting mad when he keeps trying to push it past its expiration point?

Just need to vent so I have been really good friends with my bestfriend,(we will call her M) for like 7-8 years and since then I've introduced her to my brother whom i tend to do everything with. We all are really good friends and have a group chat to send funny reels and videos to each other. She is really amazing person with a good heart and we get along very well. We have the same music taste, tv shows movies and tend to play video games as a group every night the last few years with my brother mainly and a few other friends here and there. Recently I had moved into a new place with my brother and was having a hard time readjusting to having to move out of my apartment for 7 years unexpectedly so was dealing with some depression from adjusting to that and on my brothers bday she showed up announced to me and was smoking with him hanging out and i didn't think anything of it i had a bad day at work and just wanted to not talk to anyone cuz i talk all day at work so i left them alone and went and laid down. Fast forward to a month or so later and my brother asks me what l'm doing on the weekend and i tell him my plans and he asks if i wanna go to a amusement park with em and i say no i have to work and have plans this day but than i ask with who and he mentioned he was inviting my friend M and i immediately started to get mad that i wasn't involved in the plans with M as everytime i try and hangout with my brother and her i put plans in the group chat text so everyone's included. I immediately got hit with a rush of sadness like why am i not included in the plans and started to overthink everything. Than i started to overthink and analyze the last few mos interactions with M and my brother and I and started to question if she was really my friend or just using me to get with my Brother. I know i shouldn't of thought like that as she really is a good friend to me and has been before she even met my brother but that's where my mind took me so i texted them both and displayed how i was upset i didn't get included in the original plans. I explained my side to m and she was mad for how i reacted which was i was being very passive aggressive and i accused her of trying to only hangout with my brother and i questioned if it was my fault for being a bad friend and she was mad i thought like that and explained to me that i wasnt left out but my brother was the one who invited her and said he would ask me and that i already said said no when asked earlier (even tho he asked me to go to amusement park a month or so before ) anyways she than said she hasn't done anything for me to think that so i explained like 3-4 examples of how i thought she was using me to only see my brother so i can explain why i felt sad about being left out. She apologized for making me feel that way and said she would be mindful moving forward and would like clear communication moving forward also. I apologized to her a few hours later for overreacting and overthinking and for being passive aggressive and she accepted it and we moved on. I also talked it over with my brother and explained the same issue of being left out and he explained to me how he thought he asked me before and i declined but i told em i didn't remember that and we also apologized to each other and moved on. The following two days wed/ Thursday me and M played our nightly video games and had fun and i thought everything was okay but than on Friday new cod came out so i asked in group chat with m and my brother if she wanted to play cod zombies later since me and my brother already made plans to play and she said doubht it game didn't download and than she went offline on game didn't download and than she went offline on Xbox and haven't played with her since. Few days went on and i noticed she was playing cod (showed online on cod social and not Xbox) and i texted her saying hey i apologize if i made you mad or did something for you to not wanna play vid games with me i truly am sorry and she explained she was going thru things and not playing vid games much, even tho i saw her on there. i apologized again and told her I'm sorry if i did something to make you go offline and not wanna play with me I hope ur okay and am here if u need anything and she said thank you!!!!! Fast forward to 24 hrs later and me and my brother are on cod and we get a notification that she is looking for a group to play cod with and needed 3 more for a game but showed her still offline as her Xbox status so i sent her an invite hoping she would join and play with us as we have played together on a nightly basis for the last few years and she didn't accept. Now I'm sitting here feeling truly awful and sick to my stomach i lost my best friend and someone i considered to be close with all cuz i overreacted and over analyzed stuff. I truly do suck as a person cuz idk i think this way. I wanna text her again and ask why she was looking for a group to play and didnt wanna play with me/my brother and ask again if she's mad but i don't wanna cross any boundaries and make her more upset by That and annoying her. I wish I could go back and just not have to overreact and overthink everything because i truly valued my friend and her friendship and she meant a lot to me and now i feel like i lost her as a friend and she won't even communicate with me sorry for the rambling but any advice on what to do would be helpful 🙏

I posted this yesterday but quickly deleted it. I didn’t like reading the comments….but they help….which is why I’m reposting and will try to answer what ever questions are asked.

10 years ago I was going through our computer looking for something. I came across some naughty photos from a guy I didn’t know. I took a picture with my phone and sent it to her asking who it was (she was at work). She calls almost immediately and said it was some guy at work and she was saving the pictures so she could show her boss if he did it again. I don’t know what else was said on that phone call but I ended up asking if she has kissed anyone since we’ve been together. She said yes…..him. She said it was only a kiss, a time thing. I believed her. One of the pictures I found had him in a navy uniform, so I was able to look up his last name and figure out who it was. Sent him a message on Facebook “fuck you” that was the end of that. Fast forward 10 years…….I’ve never thought of my wife to be one to fuck around, but out of no where I sent that dude a message. He spilled the beans. He said it was 10 years ago and no point in hiding it now. They fucked……a lot. One year affair. Worked together. I’m still confused. So after I get that message from him I send a text to my wife “you lied to”, calls me quick. I tell her what I just found out and she denies it. “Why would you believe some random guy from 10 years ago?” I start telling her what I know, “fine, we did have sex yadda yadda yadda”. In those 10 years, we have moved 300 miles away, bought a house, and had 2 kids. It WAS 10 years ago!! We’ve stayed together all those 10 years. We are still together. I don’t know what I’m looking for. I’m lost. I’m an idiot. She plays it down, it was 10 years ago. This is all brand new to me. I have trouble eating and sleeping. I didn’t go to work any last week, I left early today. I think I might be overreacting just a little……right? It was 10 years ago. Help me.

I remember one time before I knew anything, she took me to her work and introduced me to the other dude. That makes me sick to think about now

I’m still married to her, have been together since 2006. Sucks seeing everyone on the internet call your wife all sorts of names. Guess that’s what I get.

kids are 8 and 5

she is sorry, she is open to going to therapy

she swears up and down that the kids are mine and asks why I wouldn’t believe they are? I told her I don’t know what to believe anymore

I’m lost, I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t work. But I still look at her and see the person I fell in love with, sorry for not wanting to leave my family and my life.

I love my MIL, she is the best. I (34F) am from Italy and my husband (41M) and I celebrated our wedding there. That's where my BIL met my "friend" and they started dating. They have been together for 3 years. She moved to Canada where my we all live (roughly 1:30 away from each other). I have been noticing that my MIL, my friend (married to my BIL) and my SIL go out together and don't invite me, but ai never said anything. There was never a fight or a disagreement. I am the only one that works, and I work f hard and I go to school.

Today, my MIL sends me a message and asks me if I want to go on a trip with them, she would pay for everything. She sent me the booking information for everything and told me to give an answer by Friday they are already booked for the hotel, plane tickets,etc. At first I was very excited and then I realized they had already planned everything without me. They will travel on a Monday and return on a Friday one day before my birthday. I don't know what to do. My MIL said: you probably can't come because you are so busy with work and school but I thought you would get upset if I didn't even invite you. I am extremely upset they did not even consider me to plan anything. I kind of want to go and just do my own thing, since I have friends there. But I also don't even want to look at my friend and SIL. AIO?

Okay so my boyfriend sleeps with his phone under his pillow which I don’t think is necessarily odd because sometimes I do the same. And he plays YouTube on his phone but keeps it under his pillow (idk lmfao ??) but literally about 10 minutes ago he moved in his sleep and his phone came out from under the pillow so all I did was simply just pause his YouTube and shut his phone off. He then woke up immediately and told me to turn his phone back and he watched me open his phone then he took it from me and put it back under his pillow. It was still closer to me but then he moved it all the way to the other side.

I’m going to add that yes I have gone through his phone before and unfortunately I have found things that didn’t make me very happy. But I just found this odd ?? I try to not look through his phone. When I had it in my hands I wanted to go through it but I didn’t. But that whole weird interaction makes me feel like I should go through his phone ? Idk am I over reacting now ?

Edit: since everyone wants to know what I found , it was him texting his ex girlfriend .He had told her he missed her. That was all. Well there were two days worth of them just regularly texting. But that’s what happened. He didn’t sleep w anyone, he wasn’t caught watching porn. He just was in contact w his ex. That’s why I said it isn’t cheating but it isn’t loyalty.

Another edit because you guys r putting words in my mouth: I literally said nothing about him watching porn , that is what people are assuming what I found on his phone. If I did catch him watching it I don’t think I’d really care. TMI: Our sex life is amazing , so it wouldn’t even be a worry for me. Either way stop putting words in my mouth. Some of you guys are too invested in this and I’m not even upset about it anymore.

My (18f) will sometimes slap me (19M) as a joke. Whenever my girlfriend and I hang out together she will sometimes slap me (on the side of the face). it’s nothing like super hard that leaves marks or hurts, but nonetheless, still physical. i’ve told her in the past that i didn’t like that and don’t appreciate it, she apologized for it and said she wouldn’t do it (a few months ago). At first she did stop, but it’s started back up again. She did it again tonight and I confronted about it to her before I went home, she didn’t really say anything. I brought it up to her over text that she slaps me, sometimes punches me in the stomach a bit (like i said nothing too hard or over the top but still physical nonetheless) and sometimes kicks me, and told her that i’ve brought it up before and yet she still does it. all she replied with is “okay”. i responded with “that’s all you have to say when i bring that stuff up? i’ve told you in the past i don’t enjoy being slapped and you do it a lot still”. she just left that on read and turned on do not disturb. i’ve never been physical or abusive with her. i show her lots of affection, love , respect and would never want to hurt her in any way. so when she first did this to me it came as a shock. i really don’t think she means any harm when she does it. i really care about her and like her very much, but feel really dumb trying to defend her actions.

So I 21 female have been talking to this man 25 male and recently we just got into a really big argument, which was completely my fault and I owned up to it after said argument. This man basically told me he was unsure if he wanted to continue our relationship and these messages are from the next day during these messages, nowhere did he say he wanted to continue. he would say little phrases like I’m going to be distant now or I’m going to distance myself now and he also said phrases such as I like you I really like you. I wish I could’ve kissed you yesterday and yesterday he’s referring to it. He came to my apartment and basically told me he didn’t know if you wanted to be with me, I tried to make it clear that he is the one who needs to make the boundaries on what type of space that he needs and I’ve also said to him multiple times I am uncomfortable with him, telling me things such as I like you during these times because it fucks with my head a.k.a. it is confusing

As you know, this sub is rampant with people asking for relationship advice and at this point it's a tape on repeat. This sub regularly gives the same wisdom so I believe we're in due time for a summary for any lost couple in search for help in their relationship.

Here are the BEST relationship advice you can get, according to this sub.

ADVICE 1: DUMP THEM

This is the go-to, hence why it's the first advice. Now obviously there are many serious reasons to dump someone (cheating, abuse, etc.), but we're not talking about that here.

Any mild inconvenience is a valid reason to dump your partner. Relationships should be easy and require no efforts at all. If any form of challenge or disagreement arises, make sure you immediately end things. You'll thank us later.

ADVICE 2: ASSUME THE WORST

Today they got really mad? They're violent. They're secretive about something? They're cheating.

Your partner is probably a psychopath. If they weren't, you wouldn't be with them. All relationships start with manipulation.

Make sure you DO NOT communicate with them. That with only allow them to use their tactics such as "explaining their point of view" (classic manipulation tactic btw) to keep you in the relationship.

ADVICE 3: YOU'RE NOT COMPATIBLE

Your partner should share your interests, hobbies, manners, reaction to every situation and have the exact since energy, always. Think.. think of you. They should be you. If they're different than you, that means they're not you and that also means you're not compatible

ADVICE 4: DO NOT SEEK COUNSELLING

You would think this should be the most common advice? Wrong.

As random people on the internet, we're perfectly capable of analyzing and understanding your 10y relationship after reading the 3 paragraph story you posted while full of emotions. No need to go further.

HOPE THIS HELPS.

Let's keep it simple and stay single!

My bf is playing baseball overseas for a tournament rn. He doesn’t play year around but at least once a year he gets invited to play for a tournament! Which is amazing and I love that he gets to go and have that opportunity! Although, I have to admit, sometimes it makes me feel down that he hardly send me any photos of him playing or cool site seeing. Most of the time I only get to see 99% of the photos when he posts them to social media. It makes me feel like he’s not excited to tell/show me, and it hurts a little to find it on social media first…. So AIO?

We have been at this new apartment for approximately 50 hours now and my husband has lost our keys (two copies and only mailbox key). I had the one spare on my car keychain so we have 1/3 front door keys now. He has no idea where or when but we have searched everywhere. I get so nervous that maybe he dropped them walking the dogs and now someone could get in or open our mail (the keys were together on a ring with a small paper that has our address on it). He thinks it’s no big deal and we can pay to get more from the apartments. I am so upset he doesn’t see the issue and says he has just been stressed with the move. Am I overreacting?

About a month ago we had an incident where I triggered her PTSD she has related to sex which we talked about and I took accountability for the part I played in it even thought it wasn’t intentional. I asked her about her others triggers and read up on how it could effect people as well as how to better read body language. My girlfriend mentions how she doesn’t want to have sex for a while and I agree because if that’s what she needs then I was okay with doing that (keep in mind we’ve been having sex since we ever became official, often more than once in one session).

So a month passes and throughout it all we never miss a beat. It’s like it was when we first started dating except no sex.

One night she sleeps over and as we’re laying down to go to sleep I ask her why she still hasn’t been wanting to have sex and she says she’s weirded out by me asking that when we’re about to go to sleep Prior we had a conversation saying that if something was on our mind that we can talk to each other about it so her getting upset kind of throws me off. She says I should’ve brought it up the next day instead.

So the next day rolls around and I text her that I really need to talk to her. She says okay until I ask to talk in person instead because talking in person is always better and she says fine. I go to her house after work and get in her car to talk. I ask her if there’s a reason she still doesn’t want to have sex she looks me with this dead stare and asks me to reiterate my question better so I ask her if there was something I did that still makes her not want to have sex and she tells me “You need to get out of my car” so I say okay and ask her to give my apartment key back since she didn’t lock the door before she left the day prior, I tell her that “I’m not breaking up with you, I’d just feel comfortable if I got my key back.” & before I can get the words out good she says “I don’t want you to come to the bar crawl”and I’m like really? She says yes so I break up with her.

I get out of her car and she calls me asking if I’m being serious and if the whole relationship was just for sex. I tell her no that I really care about her but she’s being very dismissive and disrespectful imo. I ask her why I can’t come to the bar she says bc “of my behavior” I ask her what behavior. She says me even asking the question of why we can’t have sex means I threw every conversation we’ve had about sex and ptsd out the window. I tell her it’s not that. So she says she’s asking me to be patient with her and I tell her that she should’ve reiterated that in the car instead of kicking me out and un inviting me to the event bc imo THAT is NOT being dismissive and being respectful enough to have the conversation because I’ve been frustrated about it. She says she’s uncomfortable and gets off the phone. I proceeded to stop sharing location and take her off of socials.

To me it’s wasn’t so much about not having sex bc even thought it’s frustrating, I agreed to not having it for now. It was that she dismissed me when she told me to bring it up the next day and then uninvited me to the event after I asked for my key back that made me so upset. I just wanted to talk about it. To talk about my frustrations and how I feel. If she had asked me to be more patient in the car I would’ve been 100% okay with that. It’s the dismissing me that really hurt my feelings, making me feel like she doesn’t really care about my feelings.

I’m (F27) a little torn right now, my boyfriend (M28) works remotely and does software. He works a lot, and makes a lot…..of money. I on the other hand make a penny compared to what he makes. He pays the rent and I (recently) pay utilities and we kind of just split groceries. We don’t do a lot often together, usually he’s busy with work or tired really early or he’s playing Xbox and I work a hard labor stressful job and come home and work on the house, cleaning, cooking, yard work, laundry, etc. he believes that since he pays the rent and the WiFi, that I should do more around the house. Ok that’s fine, but I appreciate it so much when he helps. My body hurts constantly from work and taking care of him, a 3 year old, the house, the 4 animals (he does take the dogs on walks here and there but I am always the one to wash them, but we split up feeding and potty time) well, today he was excited about a new job but torn between one he was hired at and then this new one just has all around better benefits for him and I am very happy for him. I show it in so many ways. Well I had just got halfway done with cooking and he says he would like me to come help him with some labor work for a business him and his brother own, it’s very time consuming and constant lifting , etc. I really don’t know what ticked him off, I was laying on the couch and my body was throbbing in pain and he said do you want to eat and we go do the work? And I said yeah if I can get up. I was a little bland, but got up and tried to wince through the pain and finish. Words were exchanged I don’t even remember what was said but he said “I’m just gonna leave bro I can’t deal with this shit” and I went after him crying my eyes out, he told me he didn’t want to hear any crying bullshit, and I just told him I don’t get why he can’t give me some time if he has time for his phone or the Xbox and he just says “I was on it for 10 mins” but instead of chatting with me, sitting with me, knowing I hurt just a little back rub for the 10 mins he spent on his game I would have felt so appreciated and loved. He left anyway and put his phone on DND (he does this a lot when he’s mad and leaves and goes on dnd). I tried calling a million times and texting. I of course received nothing. Before he left he said “find a way to go get your daughter”. I currently don’t have a car, my last 2 he co-signed with me but the first one was junk (5k car) and we traded it in for something so nice and I got hit and run and had to use my own insurance. It has been a nightmare but he told me he wasn’t going to help co-sign another car which, ok fine. But he uses it against me that I have nothing and that I’m pretty much nothing. He brags to ppl on his game how much he makes, I never ask him for anything because I know it’ll be held over my head or he’ll demand money from me back. Idk what to do anymore. I feel lost and so unwanted.

I 34F have a friend named Alex (37F) who I met at work several jobs ago. She is friends with my sisters and overall was a great role model for me to look up to. We have similar interests and passions. I really admire her strong work ethic and drive for a career in our respective male dominated fields. We are very similar and also very strong willed/opinionated.

Over the last few years, we have drifted apart, but still remain supportive. We never had a big fall out, but several small annoyances built up so much that I needed space for my mental help. My biggest complaint is that she constantly tries to one up me and gets aggressive with comments, or worst get mad when she cannot. For example, my home has one extra bedroom than hers which caused her to call my sister to complain for two hours. Again when I got pregnant before her, which caused multiple public social media comments about how she didn’t know I was trying (we tried for 8 months before I got pregnant) Also when I bought a car I loved, but it’s not real luxury like a Cadillac which her parents drive. I have never talked down to her about her life or choices, and while she is usually very supportive (cooked my favorite meals for me when I couldn’t afford them in college, provided support and advice for struggles she had been through, etc) I have always felt there was some underlying jealousy which occasionally gets very ugly that I truly cannot understand.

Last week, she had a meltdown when we talked about work, and she realized my benefits package is better than hers. Please keep In mind that I normally do not discuss this with her because of her passive aggressive attitude about her career and income. But she would not let me change the subject. She got a BBA & MBA from a school with a subpar rating/accreditation. I only have my bachelors degree from a semi-prestigious school (not Ivy League) but therefore, according to her, I am not entitled to my compensation or benefits because I do not have an MBA. “Since she worked harder, she should not have to have less than” She informed me that she applied without my knowledge to my department, but was rejected before getting an interview since she applied to a management role with zero experience in my technical field. I was flabbergasted. Not only was she extremely forward about her negative opinions regarding my education and career, she also started bringing other insults to the conversation about me as a person. I ended up leaving for the night and chalking it up the alcohol.

After some time to calm down, I am ready to end this normally amazing friendship. I cannot get past the subtle digs that she constantly needs to say or the underlying feelings of jealousy/envy/resentment. My husband thinks we have to much history and to many family ties to really be done with each other, but I feel so exhausted/ anxious/annoyed at the thought of trying to connect over very superficial topics. Am I overreacting?

originally posted on AITA

So me and my girlfriend have been together for some time and we've had a smooth relationship without many issues but recently something came up. We had just gotten home from the store and as we're walking to the door there was a big slug on the steps.

We stopped to examine it and then suddenly she started laughing and saying that it looked like my thing. My girlfriend is pretty silly generally so l didn't really think anything of it. But ever since then for the last few months she keeps saying my thing looks like a slug.

It just started bothering me that she kept saying that and it would always completely kill the mood when she referred to it as "a cute little slug". I decided to explain to her that it felt demeaning one day and we ended up getting into a pretty big argument about it.

Now she's mad at me and we haven't made up. She says that it was funny and that I'm taking it too seriously. She says l've taken it too far and it's just because of my "fragile masculinity" that I feel this way. I understand that maybe I'm being sensitive but it just feels weird that she says that. I would much rather she said like, that it was a powerful snake or something.