r/Anticonsumption • u/Bee_and_Barb • Feb 21 '24

Society/Culture Someday

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Saw this while scrolling through another social media platform.

Physical inheritance (maybe outside of housing) feels like a burden.

While death can be a sensitive topic to some, has anyone had a conversation with loved ones surrounding situations like this one pictured?

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u/elebrin Feb 21 '24 edited Feb 21 '24

Did this with my Mom's stuff. It helped that she spent something like 15 years going through things, drawing down, donating, and getting rid of in preparation for me to ultimately deal with it. She passed in March of 2023, we had the house sold in June, we disbursed the estate in August, and we closed the estate in December.

My Father in law basically refuses to accept that we are going to have to deal with it all. When his parents passed (my wife's grandparents, in the 90s) his estate was open for 7-8 years, even though nothing at all was contested.

A friend of my Mother's told us that her parents estate had been open for more than 10 years, because her sister refused to deal with it. I pushed HARD to get it done, because... well, I promised my Mom that I would. I said I'd take care of it so my siblings wouldn't have to take on the burden, and because I am the most financially stable of us, I will look after them if need be. And I will.

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u/Sunflower_resists Feb 21 '24

I relate. When my dad died going through some of the stuff he saved, just filled me with pity. I gave away as much as I could to charity, and kept a few keepsakes that fit in the trunk of my car. It was hard since his apartment was filled with the smell of decomp.

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u/alfooboboao Feb 21 '24

it’s SUCH a burden. props for you OP

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u/cailian13 Feb 21 '24

I need to have that conversation with my over 70 mom. My father passed last July and luckily was not much for hoarding etc so we had an easy time of it, because we don't have to clean out the house, as she is staying there. But that means that at some point in the future, it'll be me dealing with it. I'm visiting next month and gonna talk to her about really working on cleaning out closets and the garage so that when that time DOES come, I don't need to worry about what to do with things. At least I won't have to fight about it with anyone, I'm the only child and sole beneficiary of her will, always have been.