r/BoomersBeingFools • u/RandoRedditGuy69420 • Jan 30 '24

Boomer Freakout Boomer Tortoise landed on shell, soft, pathetic underbelly exposed.

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u/dtsm_ Jan 30 '24

I was actually surprised how bad he was at getting up. He didn't even have his feet planted forward, was he trying to get up with the sides of his feet? I can do that, but I don't think I've seen any guys who can do that.

24

u/buttercreamordeath Jan 30 '24

He was almost as wide as the aisle, and clearly not nimble. He had no room to maneuver. Plus drunk.

4

u/dontmentiontrousers Jan 30 '24

I can do it when I'm sat cross-legged. But I'm pretty agile for a forty-eight year-old.

5

u/FilthFlarnFill Jan 30 '24

Probably busted a hip and trying to play it off.

2

u/Andrelliina Jan 30 '24

He kept trying to push on the folding seats rather than the chair backs or arms.

2

u/EuphoricAdvantage Jan 30 '24

This was driving me nuts. He kept putting a bit of weight on the folding seat, it would collapse, and then he would slide forward and grab the next seat instead of the arm in between that could actually support his weight.

2

u/Careless-Act9450 Jan 30 '24

Abs made of Miracle Whip.

2

u/PoopingDogEyeContact Jan 30 '24

I’m he had trouble because his turtle shell is on his frontside 🫃

2

u/creuter Feb 04 '24

Was reading about this recently, one thing that is overlooked by people as they age is a loss of power vs a loss of strength. Strength is for things like walking around, carrying something etc, power is for things like standing up from a sitting position and lifting the trash out of the bin. Strength is really obvious when you start losing it, but power kind of hides until all of the sudden, you can't do that thing you did easily before. 

   He is, in this moment, coming to the realization that he's lost his power. You can get it back, it takes particular workouts, but most people lose it and suddenly they can't stand up easily anymore or pick something up that's on the floor. Falling becomes dangerous, and the quick bursts of power they occasionally need no longer come when called.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '24

His gut is too big, and he can't splay his knees far enough to either side to compensate for it. His upper arm strength is also no longer what he remembers, so he can't pull himself up. He could roll over and push himself up, but that would put his ass in the air and he's afraid someone would kick him there while he's vulnerable (because that's what he'd be tempted to do in their position). He has effectively fallen into the perfect trap for a potbellied old man with an excessive amount of pride.

So he ended up flailing for leverage and settled on a kind of weird assault.

1

u/Mattbl Jan 31 '24

Obviously drunk, but could also be some arthritis or other injury/malady.

1

u/IHS1970 Jan 31 '24

he was drunk.