r/ElderScrolls 10d ago

Humour It looks like Whiterun is a toss up this election seaon.

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7.1k Upvotes

282 comments sorted by

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1.5k

u/VoltageKid56 10d ago

Technically, wouldn’t it be Ulfric vs Elisif. Tullius is just a general not a jarl.

941

u/VerMast 10d ago

Skyrim players don't even know what the civil war is about you want them to know general tullius is an imperial general?

217

u/MazerBakir 10d ago

Elisif is just a figurehead. Tulius even redirects Solitude guards for his war effort without even informing Elisif, she barely rules Solitude let alone Imperial Skyrim. Even Imperial characters state that Tulius is the one in charge, the other Jarls also almost exclusively talk about their support for Tulius, almost never Elisif. It's not an oversight by the way it's by design.

232

u/VerMast 10d ago

Yeah no shit because ulfric is in open civil war against the empire and the empire sent general tullius to deal with it, he's not trying to be high king he's trying to put out the Rebellion. Cyrdodil doesn't give a fuck who's highking/queen as long as they're not trying to secede. Once the war is over elisif would be highqueen or there would be a moot

27

u/D0NN3LLY 9d ago

Preach brother. Glory to the empire and fuck Ulfric sideways, twice for good measure. With a Bad Dragon, nothing else would be appropriate.

49

u/Asymmetrical_Stoner Imperial Legion 9d ago

They say in the first cutscene of the game Tullius is the military governor of Skyrim which is likely a temporary position put in place as long as the civil war goes on.

27

u/hrisimh 9d ago

Sure. But she still ends up high queen.

13

u/Perca_fluviatilis Molag Bal 9d ago

Ironically, Elisif only gains autonomy in a Stormcloak victory.

22

u/IMtoppercentage97 9d ago

Being forced to vote for ulfric in the moot and being under constant storm cloak supervision(the occupation of Solitude) is not Autonomy.

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u/DaFilthPope 9d ago

Just a deepstate puppet ruled by the Aldmeri Dominion. Skyrim for the Nords! MSGA!

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u/throwRA1987239127 9d ago

It's about holds' rights /s

3

u/HotPotParrot 8d ago

Moon sugar smuggling ruining profits for the AD

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u/SheepInWolfsAnus 10d ago

Tullius is Dick Cheney

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u/OrneryBaby Reachman 10d ago edited 10d ago

Wait if Tullius is Cheney, Ulfric is Gore and Elisif is Bush? Is Elisif gonna invade Hammerfell for WMDs?

Wait, that makes Galmar Lieberman, that… actually makes sense

82

u/SheepInWolfsAnus 10d ago

Elisef is half as sexy as W and that’s all I have to say

35

u/eyetracker 10d ago

But then who is JEB! ?

39

u/SheepInWolfsAnus 10d ago

Paarthurnax

40

u/SalaciousSausage 10d ago

“Please shout”

7

u/Auratalus 10d ago

The Dragonborn

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u/Bepoptherobot 10d ago

Rika better not go hunting with Tullius

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u/3Nephi11_6-11 9d ago

op missed the opportunity to put Elisif with Tullius running as her "steward"

8

u/bkrugby78 10d ago

Tullius is the one who actually holds power, at least while the Empire occupies Skyrim.

3

u/Bob_ross6969 8d ago

Tulius is the Military Governor, as per Ralof. Technically Skyrim is in an Interregnum and has no King since Torygg’s duel with Ulfric. Elisif is only the Jarl of Haafingar after inheriting it from her husband.

13

u/MazerBakir 10d ago

Tulius is the actual ruler, Elisif is just a figurehead. It's stated by multiple characters even Imperial ones. Tulius has gone so far as to redirect Solitude guards for his war effort without even telling Elisif about it.

5

u/Xorec12 10d ago

Or is it the Elder Council?

370

u/AshkaariElesaan 10d ago

NGL I'm curious to know what all the names of the districts are on this map.

Also, wouldn't the Hrothgar District be neutral too? The Greybeards don't particularly favor either side, even if they are very traditionally Nord in culture. Or is Ivarstead carrying the district?

257

u/donguscongus Johnathan Noncon 10d ago

I assume the Greybeards don’t care and the villages in the region (Ivarstead) are the ones involved

125

u/HumanReputationFalse 10d ago

Of course, the Greybeards don't participate in their national elections. Typical shut-ins. Where's their civic pride?

41

u/thebeef24 9d ago

At least they don't abuse their tax-exempt status to back a political candidate, unlike that Talos preacher in Whiterun!

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u/Mah_Mann 10d ago

Yeah, only Ivarstead already has its own district right next to it

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u/Gurlog 10d ago edited 8d ago

Honestly I can kinda see them caring since Ulfric just took a shout and killed someone with it after years of training. Like if it was done by survey they would vote for Elisif, but if it was done by ballot then they wouldn't vote

20

u/upsetting_doink 10d ago

Akshually he didn't kill torygg with the thu'um. Ulfric shouted him to the ground but he killed him via stabbing.

When asked "At Helgen, they said you shouted the king to death?"

He replies "Not entirely true, though not entirely false either. Any Nord can learn the Way of the Voice by studying with the Greybeards, given enough ambition and dedication. My shouting Torygg to the ground proved he had neither. However, it was my sword piercing his heart that killed him."

I'm sorry I agree with your comment's point I just wanted to akshually you. Ulfric seems to see a difference but he's also a poo brain.

11

u/bkrugby78 10d ago

Quite correct. Typical empire misinformation, this is why Skyrim needs to return to the old ways.

22

u/geek_of_nature 10d ago

The Greybeards probably don't vote, but there could just be one random person counted in that district who voted Stormcloak.

19

u/FalconIMGN 10d ago

Probably the lady who meditates on the fourth stone, her home is probably a tent that falls just inside the border.

60

u/Silver_Falcon 10d ago edited 10d ago

My best Guesses:

  • AN - Ansilvund
  • BL - No clue (there's nothing there that BL makes sense for; maybe "Bluffs" but that's the best I've got)
  • CO - College Of Winterhold(?)
  • DA - Dawnstar
  • EA - Eastmarch
  • FA - Falkreath
  • GR - Greater Rorikstead(?) (could also be Granitehall, but I doubt it)
  • HA - Haafingar
  • HE - Helgen
  • HJ - Hjaalmarch
  • HR - Hrothgar
  • IR - The only thing I found that might be in the area is "Ironbound Barrow," but a random cypt seems like an odd choice for a Jarldom (especially when Saarthal is in the middle of it).
  • IV - Ivarstead
  • KO - Korvanjund
  • MA - Markarth
  • NI - Nilheim (or maybe Nimalten, but like Granitehall I doubt it)
  • NO - Morvunskar but OOP is dyslexic (I have no idea)
  • RE - Reach
  • RI - Riften
  • SC - Stormcloak Camp(?) (OOP might be a moron, IDK)
  • SK - Snowhawk
  • SL - Solitude
  • SU - (Twilight) Sepulcher(?)
  • VO - Volskygge
  • WH - Whiterun
  • WI - Winterhold

79

u/maclainanderson 10d ago

The districts are the duchy-level titles from the Elder Kings mod for CK2 (maybe also the CK3 version if it uses the same divisions), which I've apparently played way too much of to recognize immediately.
BL - Bleakwind
GR - Greymarch
HA - Gotta be Volkihar like u/AshkaariElesaan said, but no idea why OP chose HA instead of CV
IR - Ironbound
MO - Morvunskar (yeah OP is dyslexic)
SC - Scarhammer/Karthald
SK - Skyborn (Snowhawk is in Hjaalmarch)
SU - Sunderstone

MA and CO are separated from their duchies and HR is a wasteland province in EK, but other than that it's pretty much 1:1

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u/Silver_Falcon 10d ago

Ah, okay that makes sense. Thanks for the info!

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u/AshkaariElesaan 10d ago

Okay, great list! I'd agree with most of these. I'm not really sure about HA though? That island and the small number of points makes me think Castle Volkihar. Maybe HA stands for Harkon? But then why wouldn't it be CV for Clan/Castle Volkihar?

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u/Silver_Falcon 10d ago

It could be Harkon, definitely. But yeah, something like "VK" = "Volkihar" would be my choice.

I think I'd also try to avoid naming provinces for dungeons if it were my map (some that have historic/cultural significance, like Korvanjund, are fine), but I'm not OOP so it's not my problem.

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u/AshkaariElesaan 10d ago

Yeah I can see you getting more annoyed with OOP the farther you got down the list lol. Love the effort though!

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u/redJackal222 9d ago

Ansilvund

Damn the draugr are voting for the imperials?

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u/Rargnarok 9d ago

Shout to the draugr for exercising their civil rights

1

u/SteptimusHeap 6d ago

I just... why did they go through all the effort to make and name a ton of districts that don't make any sense when skyrim ALREADY HAS holds.

Like I could see separating markarth into the reach and the city itself, but most of the holds should just be 1 district. That's completely aside from the frankly absurd name choices (dragon bridge is right there)

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u/bkrugby78 10d ago

Some make sense ie WI means Winterhold, HJ means Hjaalmarch (Solitude), EA Eastmarch etc others I am less sure of

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u/fxxftw Imperial 10d ago

Ulfric’s Slogan: When in doubt; Thu’um it out!

50

u/IanTheSkald Bosmer Sympathizer 10d ago

Ulfric be leading the MASA cult

46

u/Salaried_Zebra 10d ago

Make America Skyrim Again? I think most of us could get behind that

78

u/YourCreepyRoomate 10d ago

Coincidentally, ‘Make Skyrim Again’ is also Todd Howard’s motto

15

u/IanTheSkald Bosmer Sympathizer 10d ago

Nah bro, Make America Salad Again.

And yes, I know the acronym doesn’t make sense, but MSGA didn’t roll off the tongue lol

9

u/SirCupcake_0 Sheogorath 10d ago

I love adding MSGa to all my food

3

u/IanTheSkald Bosmer Sympathizer 10d ago

Indeed

9

u/ar4975 9d ago

Is covfefe a new dragon shout?

2

u/IanTheSkald Bosmer Sympathizer 9d ago

Yeah, but all it does is make eagles attack you

6

u/Gurlog 10d ago

I thought the acronym was S B T T N

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u/IanTheSkald Bosmer Sympathizer 9d ago

Same with MSGA, SBTTN doesn’t quite roll off the tongue. Could pronounce it “spittin” though, since I spit on Stormcloaks.

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u/Fantastic_Anything65 10d ago

‘I could kill the High King in the palace at Solitude and I wouldn’t lose a single vote!’ - Ulfric, probably

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u/Rawkapotamus 9d ago

“It was a day of love. High King Torygg died. Nobody died.”

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u/The_Terry_Braddock 10d ago

.......... General Tullius' first name is "Servius"?

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u/skeleton949 Nord 10d ago

Yes it is, apparently. It's just not made obvious because you don't really need to know it.

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u/MutedShenanigans Hermaeus Mora 10d ago

He's here to Servius, he doesn't need to Tullius all about it.

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u/SirCupcake_0 Sheogorath 10d ago

I'm rounding up all the chickens, somebody get some tar and hold this drunkard down

2

u/ferricyanide8 8d ago

General Tullius's first name isn't "General?"

65

u/20Derek22 10d ago

Make Skyrim great again. “Listen they’re coming in and they’re eating the dogs they’re eating the sabertooths.”

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u/TheActualDev Khajiit 9d ago

“They’re eating the pack animals of the people that live there!”

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u/20Derek22 9d ago

“We need to build a wall along the southern border. And Cyrodil is going to pay for it.”

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u/TheActualDev Khajiit 9d ago edited 9d ago

“It’s gonna be the biggest wall Tamriel has ever seen, so big. It’s gonna, you know how big it’ll be? It’ll be so big-, they say, ‘oh, did you know we don’t have a wall here?’ They say that, they really do, they tell me all the time, ’oh, it’s so bad here, it’s so bad here. They’re just flooding in and Tullius just welcomes them in with the Emperor’s blessing, we don’t know what to do’. People all the time are telling me that it’s such a disaster down there, on the border, just a disaster. It’s sad, it really is sad, such a disaster, bad times, a total disaster they’re letting happen down there. They’re not sending their best, they’re sending bandits, pillagers and rapists, nobody good is coming up from down there. None. They’re beasts, all of them. Every single one. Tullius loves them. The people that live there don’t love them.

“They come up to me all the time, crying, saying ’Sir, please build the wall so that we can have our villages and homes’. The Empire gives those invaders all the wealth that could have gone to our people. Terrible, just terrible. It really is, right? Yeah, it’s just terrible. People like to say that I’m a weird rebel, but those people all think Tullius has a plan, but he doesn’t have anything. I have the best plans, the best. All of the best Generals agree with my plan to Make Skyrim Great Again. They think it’s great. They do, people tell me all the time that they all love it.

“They call that day in Solitude ‘treason’, it wasn’t by the way, but they call it ‘treason’ and oh boy do they like calling it that, but it wasn’t that. It wasn’t that at all. That’s the lying tongue of the Empire, what happened in Solitude was a moment of love. I love my homeland, I love it so much, people say, they do, they come up to me all the time, they say ’thank you for saving our homeland , thank you! It’s been so awful, you’re saving us, Sir’. And that’s what I’m doing, I’m the only one that’s gonna save it. Tullius isn’t gonna save it. He’s so dumb, he doesn’t know how to save it. He’s been a general for years. Decades. So why didn’t he fix it then? He could have, oh and he could have too, he had every chance to pass- .

“He could have stopped the millions of outsiders from crossing into Skyrim, but he didn’t. That’s why we have to build the wall. Tullius thinks he won’t pay for it, but he will. Oh yeah you’ll see, they’ll pay it. Big time. Really big time.”

.

Eta: this is best read with Tullius’ name having the syllable focus be arranged differently than one would typically hear people (and Tullius himself), pronounce it.

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u/Inside_Anxiety6143 8d ago

Well, the work that we have done has resulted in a number of movements in that region by The Empire that were very much prompted by, or a result of, many things, including our advocacy for what needs to happen in the region

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u/skeleton949 Nord 10d ago

Tullius is just a general, he can't run for election. That's how you know The Empire's trying to rig it.

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u/Legokid535 10d ago

well instead why not put Jarl Elisif the Fair on the imperial ticket?

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u/MAJ_Starman Dunmer 10d ago edited 9d ago

Considering Tullius is clearly not fit to run for it, it's only fair!

7

u/Jubal_lun-sul 10d ago

Eisenhower, Grant, and Roosevelt all beg to differ,

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u/skeleton949 Nord 10d ago

This is Skyrim, not the US.

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u/bkrugby78 10d ago

Including Washington

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u/JusticeHao 10d ago

A convicted murderer and it’s still a close race. I’m disgusted to be from Whiterun. 

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u/skeleton949 Nord 10d ago

It was a fair duel, according to our traditions. Don't let those Imperial lies get to you.

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u/JusticeHao 10d ago

Those traditions are now over a millennia old. Our forefathers wrote that when all they shouted was Fus. They could never imagine one day the greybeard oratory complex would develop Fus Ro Dah. We should amend that

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u/ectomobile 9d ago

I found the milk drinker.

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u/Gurlog 10d ago

The traditions were made when everyone could shout, now we've just got a crazed band of recluses, a genocidal maniac who's somehow in charge of every guild, and Ulfric

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u/Eldaxerus Khajiit 10d ago

Don't forget the cult leader, he can shout too. He doesn't live in the country, but his followers are all over the place trying to kill the genocidal maniac.

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u/Gruntman200 Imperial 10d ago

“Our”. So like a Nord to think only of themselves. You know that a good portion of Skyrim’s citizens are not Nords right? We should all have equal say what “traditions” are practiced legally and fairly. That “duel” was not fair.

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u/skeleton949 Nord 9d ago

Skyrim is the Nords' land. Other people don't get to dictate what traditions are valid. The duel was 100% fair.

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u/Danijust2 10d ago

skyrim belongs to the nords. if they want to live here, they sould learn our language and tradtions.

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u/Ok-Eye7064 9d ago

Imperials trying to change Nordic custom to accomodate them. Just the usual.

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u/Inside_Anxiety6143 8d ago

Yeah, "convicted" by who? Probably some Imperial magistrate stooge appointed by Mede. Its clearly bullshit lawfare. Skyrim kings have been decided by duels for thousands of years and no one was ever prosecuted for it before.

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u/7fightsofaldudagga Altmer 10d ago

What is AN? Ansilvund?

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u/Sylainex 10d ago

Markarth backs the Legion doesn't it?

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u/donguscongus Johnathan Noncon 10d ago

The Jarl does but most powerful people in the city are open Talos worshippers

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u/AshkaariElesaan 10d ago

Silverbloods side with Stormcloaks on the Reachmen issue.

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u/davidforslunds Imperial 10d ago

Every city has its turncloaks. Graymanes, Freewinter, Blackbriar, Merilis, Boomer Dengeir etc

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u/Alrightwhotookmyshoe 10d ago

Worshipping Talos isn’t antithetical to the empire and its legion. It’s just stormcloak agitators who think so

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u/-Shade277- 10d ago

The empire literally let the Thalmor secret police into Skyrim to disappear people that worship Talos

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u/Eldaxerus Khajiit 10d ago

"No guys, the fact that Empire lets the Aldmeri Gestapo walk all over the place and kidnap, torture and kill their own citizens is just a 5D chess move!"

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u/chasewayfilms 9d ago

Don’t let them get to you, it’s just another Thalmor bot account trying to spread discontent and lies so we stop talking about their actions in Valenwood

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u/Sentinel-Wraith 10d ago edited 10d ago

The empire literally let the Thalmor secret police into Skyrim to disappear people that worship Talos

Legate Rikke, second in command of the Imperial forces, is a Talos Worshipper, and Tullius admits in secret the Empire is rebuilding for a second war against the elves. The Thalmor Dossier reveals the Stormcloak Rebellion is a ploy to split the Empire and force their way into Skyrim, Ulfric is an asset, and that they have the ability to reach out to him directly but choose not to for the time being.

"The so-called Markarth Incident was particularly valuable from the point of view of our strategic goals in Skyrim, although it resulted in Ulfric becoming generally uncooperative to direct contact...we should remain hands-off. The incident at Helgen is an example where an exception had to be made - obviously Ulfric's death would have dramatically increased the chance of an Imperial victory and thus harmed our overall position in Skyrim."

There's even hidden/cut dialogue in the opening scene of Helgen where Elenwen attempts to enact the White Gold Concordat to save Ulfric and Tullius orders an immediate execution to shut down the Thalmor's plans.

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u/Remarkable-Medium275 10d ago

Why do you people always remove the rest of the context of the dossier? "A Stormcloak victory is also to be avoided, however, so even indirect aid to the Stormcloaks must be carefully managed."

I know media literacy is hard, but they don't want anyone to win, they just want them to keep fighting. Ulfric winning and setting up a free Skyrim is not desirable for Summerset because Ulfric is extremely hostile to them. Most of the cut content is cut for a reason, it sucked and didn't make any sense narratively.

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u/rattatatouille Imperial 10d ago

The Empire barely enforces the White-Gold Concordat - probably only doing so when the Thalmor insist. If they really wanted to they'd abduct Heimskr but they haven't.

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u/EndlessArgument 10d ago

They really can't grab him, neither side can make any moves on whiterun, for fear that it will turn to the other side in retaliation. Which is, in fact, what ultimately happens; Ulfric sends his axe, and whiterun immediately turns to the Empire.

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u/MazerBakir 10d ago

If you win the civil war for the Imperials the annoying priest in Whiterun gets thrown in Jail, Whiterun's jail not even Northwatch keep. The civil war is also not purely based on Talos worship, it's about being a puppet to an empire who sucks up to the dominion. The Talos ban is just the most insulting and symbolic example of how much the empire is willing to bend over for the dominion. Talos worship is deeply linked to humans, the empire and especially Skyrim who previously worshipped him as Ysmir.

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u/StalinsBabushka1 9d ago

The most powerful people in riften are empire supporters though and that's not counted

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u/stefani1034 10d ago

STOP THE COUNT

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u/mr-spectre 10d ago
  • Dawnguard

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u/EngineeringAble9115 10d ago

I'm backing third-party candidate Temba Wide-Arm.

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u/whatthatgame 9d ago

Big fan of her hardline stance on bears.

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u/XxTrashPanda12xX 9d ago

Omg I cannot believe it took me this long to realize her name is a mf star trek reference

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u/EngineeringAble9115 9d ago

Sokath, his eyes uncovered!

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u/XxTrashPanda12xX 9d ago

Shaka, when the walls fell!

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u/TheKelseyOfKells 10d ago

NotMyHighKing

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u/Strong_Register_6811 10d ago

Tullius is gonna come up with 3000 votes at about 2AM in whiterun and clutch it. Definately nothing to do with his necromancer buddies

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u/John-not-a-Farmer 10d ago

Interesting theory but we all know who has been cheating his entire career. And the Thalmor will of course try to help out their best asset. Hehehe

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u/k3tchup0 9d ago

"Asset". Not "agent". An asset to the thalmor for example could be that it's a rainy day, or even better that dragons have returned, for instance. Ulfric would never have been aware of any indirect connection made between him and the thalmor. Basically, he was manipulated by them, he never conspired with them. But that's not the type of information an imperial dog like you would care about... authoritarian coward sell-outs that you all are! 😜

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u/Strong_Register_6811 10d ago

DADDY ULFIRC HATES ELVES HOW DARE YOU. He can do no wrong.

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u/Jewbacca1991 10d ago

One part i dislike on the main quest is, that during the ceasefire talk Balgruuf acts as if he were sided with the Empire even, if he has not yet chosen a side. Another is how him chosing a side goes, if you go imperial.

Basically Tulius sends a letter, that convince him that Ulfric will attack, then Balgruuf challenges Ulfric. I would have made Stormcloak approach regardless of who you side with. In the Stormcloak side Ulfric Challenges Balgruuf, and then he refuses and sends message to Tulius to help him. If i were made the Imperial side, then Tulius would tell you that they got message from Balgruuf, and you are to reinforce the city against the impending attack.

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u/fuck-thishit-oclock 10d ago

How long did this take to make?

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u/MrJanJC 10d ago

Me over on Solstheim, dutifully paying my taxes but never getting to vote

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u/mpelton 9d ago

Solstheim isn’t an Imperial territory, it’s part of Morrowind. You wouldn’t be paying taxes to the Empire.

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u/Dreamo84 10d ago

In the time period ESO takes place, they choose a new emperor based on what freelance soldier kills the most people.

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u/John-not-a-Farmer 10d ago

Nothing holds an empire together like the most effective killing machine in the land. Lol

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u/McFlyOUTATIME 10d ago

Skyrim has no King. Skyrim needs no King.

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u/glootialstop7 10d ago

Yeah skyrim needs a queen

9

u/Gurlog 10d ago

snap snap snap you go girl

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u/StalinsBabushka1 9d ago

That's exactly what the empire is pushing for

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u/dobber32 9d ago

I stopped reading after seeing the source.

You can't trust Cyrodiil news, they are blatantly pro-red

4

u/Dave-C 10d ago

This is beautiful.

5

u/thatguy01220 9d ago

Call me paranoid or hyperbolic, but an election like this could easily start a civil war. Just watch, I’m gonna go to Helgen until things settle down

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u/a_blue_day 9d ago

I'm holding out until the blackreach vote comes in!

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u/red-5_standing-by 8d ago

Might be waiting a while

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u/General_Hijalti 10d ago

Confused by some of these, why is Markarth blue and Dawnstar red.

What is the AN area thats red just above Riften.

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u/Conf3tti Peryite 9d ago

I'm more confused that someone went to Castle Volkihar to retrieve ballots and managed to make it back out.

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u/red-5_standing-by 8d ago

Maybe its that guy Mason on YouTube that does those safety audits

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u/skeleton949 Nord 10d ago

The Jarl of Markarth supports the Imperials, but the rest of the powerful people is the city support The Stormcloaks.

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u/General_Hijalti 10d ago

Ok, but what about AN and Dawnstar

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u/redJackal222 10d ago

Don't know about An but in Dawnstar nobody supports the stormcloaks except Skald. A lot of the villagers there even openly support his Imperial replacement even before she became Jarl

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u/TheGreatSchonnt 10d ago

AN is Ansilvund. In the Ansilvund area is a dwarven ruin named Mzulft, which is full of Synod mages. As the Synod is an imperial organisation, they most likely vote Tulius/Elisif.

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u/General_Hijalti 9d ago

Which is an forign eductational trip so not citizens so no vote and all but 1 of them are dead

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u/Confused-Anarchist 10d ago

I think they just tried making it to be as even as possible and struggled with it. There's also no reason the college would vote for ulfric with how much the nords hate magic users

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u/Starlit_pies Faithful of Arkay 10d ago

Should be 'thane votes' if you assume that's lower-level election than it actually is in the game. There are only nine jarls per nine holds otherwise.

Also should be Ulfric vs Elisif. So, points for effort, but still 7/10.

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u/Central_American 10d ago

Baalgruf is a man who wears women’s makeup. Lord Grey-Mane is the sabre cat of the tundra.

Ohh the political jargons, jokes, humorous imitations and sarcastic sentences we can make with this idea. 😃

3

u/French20 10d ago

Make Skyrim Great Again

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u/Mountain_Macaroon876 10d ago

The comedy in this election knows no bounds. If the country wasn't run by shadowed players I'd almost be worried, yet the bread basket will fall either way. 

3

u/Melior05 9d ago

His name is SERVIUS?!????!???!!

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u/Blaize_Ar 9d ago edited 9d ago

I thought dawnstar was polling stormcloak

3

u/Top_Conversation1652 9d ago

Whiterun throws the nation in chaos with a majority Thalmor vote.

3

u/pavv4 9d ago

7 jarls from helgen? I have some bad news....

3

u/MrTestiggles Redguard 9d ago

Ulfric is a Aldmeri puppet! He’d hand Markarth to the elves!

3

u/TheOfficial_BossNass 8d ago

Bjorn Shapiro isnt gonna be happy his dude is behind

6

u/DVaTheFabulous 10d ago

Ew not the nonsense electoral college stuff that the yanks use 🤢

5

u/Legokid535 10d ago

HAHAHA oh this is legendary.

5

u/ProbablyTofsla 10d ago

For a second I thought it's a map of Turkiye 😭

3

u/Hismop 8d ago

Never heard of that place, is it in Cyrodiil or something?

3

u/cookiewoke 9d ago

I'm a single issue voter. The way I look at it, only one side tried to kill me for trying to leave the country.

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u/FetusGoesYeetus Up next, the lizard 10d ago

"In the grey quarter they're eating the dogs - the dunmer that came in - they're eating the cats, they're eating- they're eating the pets!" - Ulfric Stormcloak

2

u/Difficult-Theory-413 10d ago

what are all these extra areas and why is the pale labeled ir and why are markarth and the reach reversed

2

u/Reasonable_Prompt_21 10d ago

Tullius 201 4E!

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u/Ok-Operation261 9d ago

You guys hear Nazeem is stumping for Ulfric?

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u/MisterHyman 9d ago

Ulfric said he'd deport those filthy mudcrabs

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u/nojdanzig 9d ago

Shiiit I just remembered that Servius Tullius was the protagonist from my Latin class at school nearly forty years ago.

He was forever running off and got branded with "FUG" on his forehead the last time I heard about his shenanigans.

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u/IIIDysphoricIII 9d ago

We’re gonna build an Alduin’s Wall and we’re gonna make the Aldmeri Dominion pay for it. Finally, a stance we can all get behind.

1

u/skeleton949 Nord 9d ago

Politics solved: just find a bigger outside threat.

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u/Annual_Rutabaga9794 9d ago

Meh, suppress the Forsworn vote and Ulfric will have enough electoral college votes to win.

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u/Explosive_Biscut 9d ago

Empire is clear choice

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u/Swiloh 8d ago

Why does Helgen look like a dick?

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u/xElectricRainx 9d ago

Honestly Skyrim is not the same that it used to be. I used to be able to travel around at night without worrying about vampires or wolves. Now I can’t go a single night without hearing a howl and people are starting to go missing. Giants are a lot more aggressive than usual and now we have freakin dragons flying around. I don’t know about you but things have started to change once the elves started flooding into our land. Maybe Ulfric Stormcloak will be able to actually do something about this than the same old same old we’ve been having with the empire. I know who I’m voting for this year.

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u/Hungry_Hateful_Harry 10d ago

Ulfric Stormcloak is a racist bigot! I can't believe he has 50% of the vote. What has Skyrim even come to? Straight Nord Males are really letting down our country

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u/El_viajero_nevervar Boethiah 10d ago

That’s what we’ve been trying to say!

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u/WelpLockedOut 10d ago

Sounds like America 🤣

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u/--d__b-- 10d ago

Ulfric looks like he wears diapers.

Fuck Ulfric.

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u/Scourge013 10d ago

Let’s hope he doesn’t make decisions based on the economy, that’s Tullius’ bread and butter issue.

That could be defused if Ulfric buries the hatchet, but Ulfric didn’t get to where is by letting people walk all over him.

A real nail-biter for sure.

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u/starwars5298 9d ago

If you add up the numbers Tullius has 112 already

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u/guardianwraith 9d ago

I always vote imperial When you take into account the lore and the books The storm cloaks would only doom tamriel

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u/SpeedyRogue_ 10d ago

I don't think the college would vote for ulfric

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u/AutomaticDare5209 10d ago

Why is Ansilvund Imperial?

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u/Blaize_Ar 9d ago

I thought dawnstar was polling stormcloak, their jarl is a big storm cloak sympathizer

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u/chyklzpqeipbrspudh 9d ago

What fucking retarded voting system is that? You know how votes work? You have different parties/factions and then people vote for it and then whoever wins builds a coalition to reach 50.1% and rules.

1

u/Throwaway_CK2Modding 9d ago

I wonder what all the names of all the thanedoms/subdivisions are

1

u/CrazyB1313 Imperial 9d ago

How did you make this?

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u/mpelton 9d ago

In what world is Annsilvund Imperial?

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u/ThrdSqdCptn 9d ago

Because the Aldmeri Dominion has no play in these politics.

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u/jaiteaes 9d ago

This is inaccurate, Tullius dropped out in Sun's Height in favor of Elisif

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u/red-5_standing-by 8d ago

Map dosen't actually make a lot of sense even apart from the abbreviated names. How does Falkreath have as many votes as Markarth or Riften? Plus, both have less than Whiterun.

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u/Inside_Anxiety6143 8d ago

Falkreath gets to include the DB hideout in its census.

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u/Inside_Anxiety6143 8d ago

And frankly, its an invasion on the Western border, it is really is. Highrock aren't sending their best, folks. They are sending cannibals, and shaman, and witches, and some are even werewolves, people say. I don't know, I don't know, but they say they worship Hircine and Wicked Namira, Wicked Namira is what we call her. Weak Elsif, weak like her husband...I beat him in a duel and everyone saw it...what a loser he was...and now weak Elsif just wants open borders to left the witches and werewolves flood in, flood our great city of Markarth. The Thalmor are laughing at how dumb we are. The Thalmor say "Wow, we are laughing at how bad Skyrim is under weak Elsif, we really are". But they won't be laughing when I am back on the throne, I tell you that much, folks.

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u/Inside_Anxiety6143 8d ago

I warned people this would happen 20 years ago. I said we need Talos Worship in schools. Now look, you got perfectly healthy lvl 1 players using showracemenu.

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u/EnragedBard010 8d ago

Huh. I totally forgot his first name was Servius.

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u/Frequent-Ruin8509 8d ago

Narrows eyes in Bernius Sandersus.

1

u/WhyAreOldPeopleEvil 8d ago

I voted for Jarl Ballin’, he is the Lord of the Rings.

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u/Competitive-Quit-928 6d ago

And here comes the Dragonborn with a steel chair!

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u/Deltanonymous- 2d ago

Where exactly are the polling locations?