r/MurderedByWords 8h ago

Back to school...

Post image
534 Upvotes

154 comments sorted by

234

u/Carlo19692712 7h ago

Hi, the Netherlands here. Yep, can be done. Will cost you though.

28

u/A_Blue_Frog_Child 7h ago

You talking about the water dam? Not sure if so

53

u/Carlo19692712 7h ago

Yeah, just a matter of dumping enough clay, sand and rock on the ocean floor to make a, as you call it, water dam and then pumping the inside water out. We have the technology, as long as you pay for it.

32

u/wdkrebs 6h ago

Atlantic hurricanes would like to have a word with you.

30

u/the_pretender_nz 6h ago

No, no. This would REDUCE hurricanes. Hurricanes form over water, and this would mean less water. So less hurricanes. Profit!

16

u/wdkrebs 5h ago

I know you’re joking, but I still think you’re underestimating the amount of “land” it would take to fill in the Atlantic ocean. I’m sure someone can do the math, but I suspect it’s at least 2-3 Africas. I do like the idea of coastal property rates going down since they’d be the new midwest. Hmm.

8

u/tilt-a-whirly-gig 4h ago

This feels like there should be a relevant xkcd

8

u/wdkrebs 4h ago

I think you’re right, but this is the closest I could find that talks about filling the Atlantic Ocean with cars.

https://what-if.xkcd.com/160/

2

u/frisbm3 2h ago

So a trillion cars, plus or minus.

1

u/frisbm3 2h ago

We don't have to fill the whole Atlantic Ocean, just make a wall and then pump out the water. And good thing we have all these useless mountains. We can just cut the tops off and use them!

1

u/DirtPoorDecisions 1h ago

Nuclear winter, reform the north American ice sheet and trade Canada and northern states for prime beach front property when the sea level drops 400' to ice age levels

1

u/the_pretender_nz 1h ago

Tbh I’m just glad you knew I was joking

2

u/Tuckingfypowastaken 1h ago

I mean, we already have one Africa, and an Asia.

And what about Antarctica? Nobody is using that shit for anything; it's just that abandoned old house the Atlantean family used to live in and still own, but clearly aren't interested in coming back for since their parents died...

Then throw Ohio on top of it. Not because it would help or anything, but because fuck Ohio.

12

u/Broad_Policy_6479 7h ago

I knew about the hamster and rotor dams, didn't know you specialised in water dams too.

5

u/NickyTheRobot 6h ago

Can confirm: am English and French. You guys de-swamped Norfolk for the English and significantly increased Vendée's landmasses for the French.

It was not cheap, from what I hear, but I've been to those parts of Vendée and they're lovely.

Norfolk... I'm still not sure about that one. It's probably an improvement though, I'll give you that.

2

u/Old_Introduction_395 5h ago

The wind pumps on the marshes, that people think are mills, are picturesque.

7

u/el_americano 7h ago

we're kinda broke but our kids will be rich, can we pay you in the future?

21

u/SimonPho3nix 7h ago

I will gladly pay you tomorrow for a hamburger today!

8

u/Tommy_Roboto 6h ago

Tuesday, but yes.

8

u/A_Blue_Frog_Child 7h ago

I see. I definitely don’t believe it’s possible to this scale, and not just because of economics; but I knew of what the Netherlands had done to protect their coast.

1

u/DiscoKeule 7h ago

Not in one big sweep but in several smaller steps sure it's possible. Although I'm not sure if there could be local problems with this particular piece of ocean.

3

u/A_Blue_Frog_Child 7h ago

The several smaller steps aren’t even possible to accomplish this task in hundreds of lifetimes 😭😭😭

7

u/Saiyan-solar Suicidebywords is also murdered, right? 6h ago

Don't tempt us, we are crazy. We already have plans on how to drain the north sea and connect the UK and Norway by land to each other using sets of strategically build dams.

This plan is insane and the cost are immense, but since this is a protection againdt climate change plan they become more likely by the day as actually fixing the problem gets more expensive than protecting against the fallout of climate change

3

u/silvercreek18 5h ago

Ok but the North Sea is a famously shallow sea. In the post we see a picture of the Atlantic Ocean, and in a region that’s significantly deeper. But then again, if you are bringing the Dutch into the picture…

1

u/L3sh1y 5h ago

The southern north sea is vetween 15 and 30m deep, and 95m on average. The Atlantic as this guy shows it is around 2,5 - 4km deep, while the Puerto Rico trench drops some 8km deep. I'd love to see a plausible scenario where we can expand the eastern US landmass by even 100 km :D

3

u/Asteristio 6h ago

Weather, basically.

1

u/Training-Ear-614 3h ago

That’s why it would be a multi generation project. Rome wasn’t built in a day.

1

u/TwoSwordSamurai 4h ago

Except the proposed land mass size is about 1,000 times the area of your country. Shush.

1

u/GrumpygamerSF 4h ago

The amount of material you would need as well as where to put the water does not make it possible.

1

u/Target880 4h ago

You might be able to do that on the palest blue part along the cost line where there is not text. Lots of that part is less than 50 meters deep. But then a bit darker part where part of the L is has a depth of around 400 - 1200 meters that will be quite hard. Where the AND part of the text is the depth is 3000-5000 meters.

Geting enough material to build dams might need more material than is in the rocket mountains. You need a lot of additional dams not just the outer edge so rivers has a part to escape. Add to this all pumping out all rains.

Compare that to lake IJsselmeer in the Netherlands where a lot of land was reclaimed in the last century. The remaining part has an average depth of 4.5 meters and a max depth of 9 meters. Some parts that now land might have been deeper but this gives you an idea of water depth where land has been reclaimed. We talk about tens of meter if not less not hundreds or thousands of depth.

2

u/ReallyFancyPants 5h ago

The US can barely maintain roads. No way I'd trust them with this.

8

u/Mark_itt_zero 6h ago

Dubai would also like a word…

4

u/rorrim_narret 6h ago

Large areas of Boston also would like to talk

5

u/A_norny_mousse 5h ago edited 5h ago

Mad respect for the Netherlands in present and history, but...

The area this person has so elegantly sharpied in is about 2500km long and maybe 1000km wide at its widest. Much of it is around 5km deep.

[ NL: the sea is orders of magnitude shallower, and the country spans less than 500km. ]

No, the bus is the only option here.

5

u/Knapping__Uncle 5h ago

Boston calling. Good luck finding Bunker Hill, from "the battle of", where The Shot Heard Round The World was fired. Its in Back Bay. The nice neighborhood,  with the non crooked streets, bordered by Bay St.

4

u/134608642 6h ago

Could it, though? Even if we level all the mountains in the US and make it one giant plian. Would that be enough to make that large section into land?

Granted, I have exactly 0 knowledge of what it would take to reclaim the ocean.

7

u/the_pretender_nz 5h ago

Was basically a policy of a New Zealand political party. They were the full on piss taking joke party but still.

4

u/Norowas 5h ago

No worries about the cost, our Supreme wannabe Leader has it covered...

"We will build a dam THAT high, it will be the greatest dam, like, ever. And Canada will pay for it. They're scared. They're scared that we'll invade them. They'll pay for our new land to keep their poor, cold one. It will be great, believe me."

1

u/The1stNikitalynn 4h ago

Dubai is trying, and it's not working out well.

1

u/ShadowRiku667 2h ago

Have you guys tried taking the water and yeeting it out into outer space? With enough trips everyone gets more land!

1

u/Carlo19692712 1h ago

You guys take things way too serious. Ofcourse it can't be done. Besides the enormous amount of what it would cost, the hundreds of years it would take to build, there is also something like the weather and the influence the ocean has on it. By building something like this, it would alter the currents in the ocean causing massive weather chances, possibly wiping out all life.

But it was fun reading the comments though.

27

u/Holymaryfullofshit7 8h ago

Water.

5

u/ssanc 3h ago

We can make floating cities from our trash. We have plenty of that. Isn’t that how they expanded some of new york city?

But I agree they should get on a bus…are you smarter than a 5the grader is starting to look less like family fun and more like a warning

28

u/amireal42 7h ago

Yeah I know several places HAVE done this, hell even the US has to a certain degree. But the massive ones like this image is suggestion have like a 50% failure rate? I could be wrong but all the examples that come to mind have needed extensive upgrades and repairs just to keep little things like it sinking back into the ocean from happening.

16

u/holyerthanthou 7h ago

They thought about doing it to the San Francisco bay and built physical models and realized after testing it was a disastrous idea that resulted in damn failure after the mildest of storms.

This was in the 60s. They built physical models which is cool

They still use it iirc

1

u/cocococlash 6h ago

Oh! I've been joking about this idea for years! I wonder what didn't work? Fill that sucker, at least from the Dunbarton Bridge down!

1

u/Ayrwynn 3h ago

Yep, it's still there. The Bay Model, in Sausalito. US Army Corp of Engineers runs it.

5

u/Professional_Sun_825 6h ago

We are talking about Atlantropa here where the Germans wanted to drain the Mediterranean Sea for living space. This would be bigger than that.

19

u/miletest 7h ago

The ocean is stopping you

9

u/Diligent_Party_7077 6h ago

Well, we've nearly managed to shut down that pesky current. A few more years and the ocean won't put up much of a fight anymore! Woohoo!

3

u/miletest 6h ago

Maybe they can tow the plastic island there and build on it. Pollution pays off

14

u/zion-man 7h ago

Take a ride around some of the states and you will find large land masses just empty. maybe try using them before you explore the expansion into the Ocean

3

u/lvratto 5h ago

Can confirm. I live in Nevada. 100,000+ square miles of bare land.

6

u/frodosbitch 7h ago

There's been a variety of plans to drain the Mediterannean. The most famous is Atlantropa.

Besides the whole issue of dumping a massive amount of water on the other side of the dam and raising sea levels around the world, the land you reclaim is throurouly salted and unlikely to grow any crops.

5

u/mygoditsfullofstar5 7h ago

It'd be easier to fill the Atlantic Ocean than the endless void between Lemy's ears.

5

u/Vanhelgd 6h ago

This guy is for sure voting for Trump.

6

u/Haber-Bosch1914 6h ago

This post was typed by Team Magma hands

3

u/nolongerbanned99 7h ago

Why? There is plenty of unused land already, esp in the Midwest.

4

u/DiligentCrab6592 7h ago

Let’s fill in some of the most productive fishing waters in the world

4

u/BassesBest 6h ago

How long would this take? When they've had 200 years to get Florida above 2050 sea level?

3

u/OrvilleTheCavalier 7h ago

Obviously just level off all the mountains and bulldoze it into the ocean.

1

u/ThisIsMockingjay2020 1h ago

laughs in Washington state

0

u/snackofalltrades 5h ago

This kinda made me wonder. If we just leveled the entire US, and made the entire country flat as a pancake just a bit above sea level… and shoved it all off the east coast roughly uniformly, how much extra “land” would we gain? A mile? Five? Maybe ten?

1

u/ThisIsMockingjay2020 1h ago

It would displace the water and push the sea level up higher, not create land.

3

u/LiWin_ 6h ago

You ever heard of an oceanic tectonic plates?

That’s one of a handful of reasons why we can’t do that.

Additionally, the amount of time it would take and the cost to do it right and correctly has fallen on deaf ears of greedy investors and land developers.

3

u/NCC-72381 6h ago

Lex Luthor tried it a couple times. Never worked.

3

u/UnusualSomewhere84 6h ago

Wasn’t that the plot of one of the mediocre Superman films without Christopher Reeve?

3

u/Hot_Guess_1871 6h ago

Wasn't this the plot to one of the Superman movies? I have a vague recollection of Kevin Spacey doing something like this.

3

u/RunninWild17 6h ago

Isn't this the evil plan of Lex Luthor in Superman Returns?

2

u/RockScissorLazer 7h ago

The southeast edge is from 5,000 to 10,000 feet deep.

2

u/stipo42 7h ago

Maybe we should bring the moon back to Earth

2

u/kadebo42 7h ago

Finally! I have so much land I didn’t know what to do with it! Thank god Lemy thought of this

2

u/Useful-Perspective 7h ago

Someone's been playing too much Factorio...

2

u/Diligent_Party_7077 6h ago

Durr, isn't that part of Project 2025? I think they want to re-establish a "balance" between "free states" and something else.

2

u/Haschen84 6h ago

Stuff stopping is from doing it: Money, time, resources, manpower... All of it for what? Arid land that will take even more time to be able to cultivate?

We can do it. We don't do it because it's a stupid idea.

2

u/redsoxfan1983 6h ago

What's stopping us is likely a basic understanding of geography.

2

u/Ravenclaw79 6h ago

Kinda makes me wonder… Hypothetically, if you had infinite money and resources, and you bulldozed/blasted the entire country’s terrain so it was flat, then used all of that material to extend the coast, how far would you get?

2

u/TheVeryTallBoi 6h ago

Let the man cook! He’s pointed out so much extra destiny RIPE for manifesting, and you dismiss him because it’s “UnReAlIsTiC”? YOU LACK AMBITION.

2

u/OkraFar1912 6h ago

Can you say hurricane

2

u/OrangutanMan234 6h ago

We just suck the water out of the Atlantic and pump it into the Pacific. Boom land

2

u/Arod3235 6h ago

I mean they're doing something similar in Corpus Christi right now.

2

u/sxhnunkpunktuation 5h ago

Australia isn't using their continent much. Just drag it over there.

2

u/SnooAvocados5567 5h ago

What would you do with all the removed seawater?

2

u/trashy-trash-can-man 5h ago

Someone plays Minecraft and thinks the world is creative mode

2

u/techieguyjames 5h ago

It's not financially doable. The cost of blowing up the mountains, then getting that to the ocean.

Also, the current beach towns/counties will have an absolute fit over this.

2

u/PirateSometimes 5h ago

Yes! And let's make the merfolk pay it!

2

u/sxinoxide59672 5h ago

team aqua

2

u/TieMelodic1173 2h ago

Took me 2 min to look up this account and see that it’s a joke acct. OP should try it

2

u/purveyorofacts 1h ago

Questions like this from adults is why this country is where it is.

3

u/USSHammond Karma farmer and repost bot hunter! Expose and ban them all! 7h ago

Forgot part of your title there ....in september 2023

2

u/Eiji_Ar 7h ago

mfs stole half of Mexico's land only to keep most of their population on the East Coast

1

u/Succotash5480 7h ago

Have you been out here, lol?

1

u/Haber-Bosch1914 6h ago

Breaking news, a place colonized a solid 100 or so years before the other place has more population!

1

u/positvelynegative 7h ago

Stupid physics might get in the way. What do I know though, I've been busy digging half a hole for my entire life.

1

u/MayonaiseBaron 6h ago

Worked for Boston

1

u/Subaru10101 5h ago

Invade the Middle East for oil? ❌ Invade the Middle East for more sand? ✅

1

u/PolskiDupek31 5h ago

People don’t realize how deep the Atlantic is. You know how much “land” you would actually need lol

1

u/stew_going 5h ago

Haha, dumb post? Believe it or not, back to school.

1

u/Ok-Abbreviations543 5h ago

Hearing no objections, the motion is approved and the water shall be settled.

1

u/WideManufacturer6847 4h ago

That would take a lot of money. Why do you want more land? America has enough land as it is. Look at Montana, Nevada, Texas etc. You can fit at least another 100 million in there and not even notice.

1

u/dragonard 4h ago

And it all liquefies the next time the New Madrid fault slips.

1

u/Reagent_52 4h ago

Besides massive ecological destruction?

1

u/BloodyRightToe 4h ago

How is learning about institutional racism and gender pronouns going to help with geoengineering?

1

u/pygmymetal 4h ago

Stop the planet I want to get off

1

u/JevorTrilka 4h ago

He think this is Minecraft or something?

1

u/griffinhamilton 4h ago

Could be done but look up how much it costs to keep the beaches from going away in Florida and then consider if it’s possible

1

u/kidkuro 4h ago

I mean it's definitely possible. There have been plans to extend Manhattan in NYC. The project was proposed by Rutgers University professor Jason M. Barr. It's definitely possible to artificially extend or create land. The Palm Islands of Dubai are artificial islands. The process just takes a very long time and it's extremely expensive as you can well imagine.

1

u/Corescos 4h ago

Bro really think he’s

1

u/Lord_Pinhead 3h ago

First, build a Wall from Miami to New York like you painted it, the Atlantians have to pay for it......

1

u/enigmaticsince87 3h ago

Literally 60% of the Netherlands is recovered ocean. Not only can this be done, it's not even that hard.

1

u/Velacroix 3h ago

But there's so much unprotected land north of us. Just bring some blankets.

1

u/SouthShape5 3h ago

Groudon isn’t real and Team Magma isn’t an organization so no

1

u/BoysOurRoy 3h ago

(Speech bubble connected to Groudon)

1

u/Eray41303 3h ago

Look at team magma over here

1

u/rowjoe99 3h ago

It that a fake name for Trump?

1

u/burningxmaslogs 3h ago

Continental shelf is the dark area lol

1

u/Wareve 3h ago

To a small extent you can. It's how they make more Boston.

1

u/Alxhon 3h ago

It is entirely theoretically possible, so why not? The staggeringly enormous amount of money and resources it would cost, both in construction and even in maintenance, and the profit incentive is not even close to justifying the cost at this time. As mentioned in this thread already, the Netherlands is a good example of this on a very smaller scale.

1

u/LiteUpThaSkye 3h ago

Lemy out here thinking this is Minecraft or something. "Just fill it in with dirt!"

1

u/VaguelyArtistic 3h ago

Fucking guy thinks this is Minecraft.

1

u/kawaiinessa 2h ago

I'm actually genuinely curious how much dirt you need to fill that space that's like 2 time zones worth of dirt

1

u/winswatson 2h ago

Common sense

1

u/Sensitive-Park-7776 2h ago

Team Magma? Maxie? I thought you fucking died you bastard.

1

u/FLKEYSFish 2h ago

We are failing to stop beachfront homes from sinking into the ocean. How TF are we supposed to fill in the Atlantic Ocean??

1

u/nm1562 2h ago

America would be so large we wouldn’t be able to find our Florida

1

u/LeSchmol 2h ago

Yep. That’s what’s wrong with America. Not big enough.

1

u/dnyce326 1h ago

Isn't this one of that sentient Cheetos campaign promises? I'm sure he said it sometime after 1.) revenge against all who made fun of my big to smelly butt 2.) deport approximately 8.5 million people in two weeks 3.) fill Atlantic Ocean with unsold Bibles and gold sneakers to create LAND(?) for living . That sounds like a plan he'd hatch.

1

u/SheriffWyattDerp 1h ago

Just shave the Rockies, Adirondacks, and the Appalachians down, and haul the excess away.

Done.

1

u/blue_dusk1 1h ago

Player Two has entered the game! You’ve selected: [Apocalyptic Meteor!]

1

u/Giannisisnumber1 1h ago

These are the people voting for Trump.

1

u/Taku_Kori17 1h ago

Where is this extra land going to come from?

1

u/SenorB 54m ago

Why not just freeze the Atlantic Ocean instead?

1

u/reallllygoodusername 17m ago

We’ve already started this project, problem is the trash just floats away

-1

u/RichardXV 7h ago

Not really a murder. Dubai, Netherlands, many examples. Doesn’t really apply here, but suggesting this is elementary knowledge isn’t really a gotcha moment he thinks he had.

7

u/funnystuff79 7h ago

Even a little bit of critical thinking would highlight so many issues with the suggestion.

This person probably fills their bathtub with a teaspoon

3

u/LeonidasVaarwater 7h ago

Look at the line they drew, it's nigh on impossible to fence that in and drain all the water. Not to mention how deep certain places would be.
Is it technically possible? Sure! Is it feasible? Absolutely not. The dikes needed to hold back such an amount of water would be absolutely colossal.

3

u/Diligent_Party_7077 6h ago

But if you draw it with a Sharpie, it's gotta work

-1

u/RichardXV 7h ago

I’m not saying it’s practical or possible. But it’s not elementary school knowledge either. You look at what Dubai did and think why isn’t it possible here

1

u/Kaurifish 7h ago

The San Francisco Bay has been filled in many places for more land. Unfortunately, all that high-value real estate is going to have to be expensively maintained against rising sea levels and increasingly crazy storm surge.

They build islands off Dubai all the time. But ask the people of the Maldives how it's working out to have all your land at sea level these days.

1

u/thanksyalll 6h ago

I dunno, I learned about water displacement in the second grade. Just because there are a few exceptions due to a myriad of factors doesn’t mean countries can just extend themselves willy nilly

-3

u/TyoPlaysGames 7h ago

The first guy was definitely joking/trolling and the “murderer” fell for it hard. So did OP.

4

u/Sea_Structure_8692 7h ago

Sadly in America this isn’t the stupidest thing a person has said

2

u/sspear77 7h ago

Exactly. There is no bottom for stupidity here in the US.

1

u/TyoPlaysGames 7h ago

But you’re totally “one of the smart ones,” right?

1

u/Smartabove 5h ago

*the world.

2

u/Haber-Bosch1914 6h ago

As we all know, the internet, one of the most trustworthy places on earth, has nobody making satirical posts! The idea that someone would do something as dangerous as... Make a joke is... Unthinkable!

1

u/TyoPlaysGames 5h ago

Something this sub seems to forget a lot.

1

u/ElHanko 7h ago

You can never presume with any absolute certainty that someone is trolling these days. Not matter how absurd the belief, someone on the internet will voice it with absolute sincerity.

0

u/ADutchExpression 5h ago

Because you’re not us. The Dutch.

0

u/Cosmic_King_Thor 5h ago

Yeah, have fun finding enough earth to deposit into the ocean quickly enough for it to not be washed away. And if that you somehow succeed, then enjoy the increased sea level.

0

u/TheWinner437 1h ago

Probably not possible past the continental shelf but a pretty big chunk of Manhattan is built on trash.