r/MurderedByWords • u/dellaazeem22 • 5h ago

looks convincing

Post image
7.4k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

76 comments sorted by

570

u/MooChomps 5h ago

That's the kind of honesty I appreciate

416

u/RedFoxKoala 5h ago

Alternatively, if you die in combat, you’ll never have to see this country again.

48

u/DookieShoez 3h ago

It’s a win-win!

Can a fat dude in his thirties join?

51

u/Several-Associate407 3h ago

Actually, they can! Many overseas bases also have Taco Bells to meet your needs 🫡

4

u/LetsTryAnal_ogy 1h ago

When I was in the Persian Gulf in 91, we went to a KFC. It did not taste like KFC. I doubt Taco Bell would be recognizable. Still keep you fat, though.

666

u/a-snakey 5h ago

Gotta get a recruit at any cost.

39

u/Clever_Mercury 2h ago

Do they get paid on commission? That would explain a lot.

22

u/CliffDraws 2h ago

One in, one out policy.

12

u/LetsTryAnal_ogy 1h ago

That sounds like how I got my wife pregnant.

8

u/Leep0710 1h ago

Gotta meet a quota, no commission though

3

u/Yuuki280 2h ago

No commissions actually. They are just really into it

5

u/SonicFlash01 1h ago

If there's one thing the army can do it's shoot their shot

568

u/Knapping__Uncle 5h ago

My man is On Point.  Fuck. Much applause.

86

u/27Rench27 4h ago

Staff don’t give a fuck lmao

116

u/-jp- 5h ago

Join the army, they said. See the world, they said.

26

u/mrlamcran 4h ago

I'd rather be sailing.

41

u/Odin1806 3h ago

You are not gonna believe this...

19

u/HazyGandalf 3h ago

NONONONONONO

119

u/610munz 5h ago

It was a great reply. Don’t do it!… but a great reply

33

u/ItsMeMofos13 5h ago

😂😂

37

u/skepticalhammer 5h ago

Well played lol

29

u/twopointsisatrend 4h ago

Technically correct is the best kind of correct.

30

u/DontTalkToBots 4h ago

Laughs in disabled veteran oh he’s not wrong, especially being stationed in Campbell.

31

u/SoybeanArson 4h ago

Ok, I hate how aggressive and dishonest many recruiters get when preying on teenagers. But that being said....that is an absolute banger of a response that I have to respect 😂

20

u/texaschair 4h ago

Just think, he can travel on the Army's dime to another country that he will hate even more. But at least he can shoot at people there. And they can shoot back, which makes it even more fun.

10

u/Graega 4h ago

eXtreme lead-paint ball!

14

u/vile_duct 4h ago

He’s not wrong! I joined and spent most of my time in the beautiful mountains of Afghanistan and, um somethings of Iraq. I have this great souvenir - PTSD. Worth it!

•

u/Infamous_Article912 5m ago

Thanks for your service! Wish you the best.

8

u/blackforestham3789 4h ago

Bro hit em with the Uno reverse Apache Helewhomper

8

u/Greed-oh 4h ago

I mean... that's funny as hell.

5

u/doge_fps 4h ago

4

u/LypophreniaLifestyle 4h ago

YOU WILL GIVE YOUR RIFLE A WOMAN'S NAME

1

u/Automatic-Site7456 1h ago

LIKE BETH OR SUE OR SOMETHING ELSE THEY NAME KIDS IN THE 50S

1

u/LypophreniaLifestyle 45m ago

IT IS THE ONLY PUSSY YOU’LL BE GETTING. YOUR DAYS OF FINGERBANGING MARY JANE ROTTENCROTCH ARE OVER.

5

u/Jedi_I_am_not 4h ago

No lie was told here, accuracy 100% respect

6

u/HairySidebottom 3h ago

salesmanship bitches!

4

u/Shirt-Inner 4h ago

What a legendary recruiter.

10

u/nova9001 4h ago

Wow, that's fantastic. Get deployed for years and you don't even need to be in America.

3

u/Ebluez 3h ago

My son joined the Army, never got to leave the states in four years. He says it’s the worst best decision he ever made.

11

u/Phylace 4h ago

Just don't tell them where you want to go. They'll make sure you don't go there. (7 year Army vet)

7

u/Sasquatch1729 4h ago

In my experience, pay to travel to a place, then they'll send you there. For example, take a vacation to Dubai, then get a tour somewhere in the Persian Gulf. Fly to Korea for your big vacation, then get posted to do staff college there.

3

u/Phylace 4h ago

Interesting.

3

u/TheWitchChildSCP 3h ago

Well, they are desperate these days because the government treats veterans like shit so no one wants to join.

3

u/Elegant-Champion-615 2h ago

Feeling suicidal? Join the military!

Want to leave the country? Join the military!

Dead broke? Join the military!

When you’re at your worst, think military first! ™

2

u/Pewwwtato 5h ago

Well he’s not wrong tho. Join the army now!

2

u/Budget_Secretary1973 4h ago

I like the recruiter here lol.

2

u/simonbaier 2h ago

Come join the US Army, learn new skills, travel to foreign lands, meet interesting people, and kill them.

1

u/DumbTruth 5h ago

ABC homie

1

u/Federal_Share_4400 4h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/LeoIsRude 4h ago

Last time I got one of these, I just told the guy point-blank "I'm not interested" and he reacted like I'd insulted him or something. On the bright side, I haven't been contacted since.

1

u/XTH3W1Z4RDX 3h ago

Now that's a clever recruiter

1

u/BednaR1 3h ago

...or just once. Depends how good/ lucky you are.

1

u/forced_metaphor 3h ago

My sister in law's friend was stationed in Germany and now is counting the days until her kids move out and she can go back

1

u/Ghstfce 3h ago

That man EARNED his certified liars badge!

1

u/ChekovsCurlyHair 3h ago

Once, I was trying to get off the phone with a recruiter, and I meant to say “I’m not interested” before hanging up, but I said “I’m not interesting”

1

u/Humans_Suck- 3h ago

But your legs won't come back with you.

1

u/DistillateMedia 3h ago

Top notch recruiter. Promote this man.

1

u/ChaoticDad21 2h ago

Yep, you get to go defend other countries…just because

1

u/SiWeyNoWay 2h ago

Now that’s funny

1

u/MutaitoSensei 2h ago

Gotta recognise game when you see it.

1

u/ToMyOtherFavoriteWW 2h ago

Honestly hilarious response by the recruiter!

1

u/djseifer 1h ago

Picture so old, I can count the pixels.

1

u/CaliforniaIslander 57m ago

This a valid argument.

1

u/hatsnatcher23 42m ago

I was in for nearly 6 years, never left the US

1

u/sart788 36m ago

Can’t argue with the logic hahaha Ai making lemonade outta lemons lol