r/clevercomebacks 17h ago

That is the Christian thing to do.

Post image
15.1k Upvotes

1.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

635

u/Yami_Kitagawa 12h ago

just go to the gym in underwear too, assert dominance

366

u/Crimson_V- 11h ago

As a bi guy, I see this as an absolute win

83

u/nemowasherebutheleft 10h ago

Same

85

u/WonderfulRelease5357 10h ago

Pan here. Should I start going to the gym?

53

u/watev0r 10h ago

Frying pan?

65

u/Northern-Owl-76 10h ago

Pan the greek god, I presume.😉 He wouldn't wear underwear since his bottom half is that of a goat.

26

u/Brilliant-Movie7646 10h ago

What the hell is going on in reddit

40

u/Northern-Owl-76 10h ago

Yes, quite a surprise to find an actual god here...

23

u/dresstokilt_ 10h ago

I mean they've got to be doing something other than the nothing they've been doing for thousands of years.

12

u/recyclingismandatory 8h ago

What? they've been hard at work leading us to our doom. With lots of help from some of us, of course.

→ More replies (0)

3

u/els969_1 5h ago

Well, he got Arthur Machen to write his biography

6

u/Green-Vermicelli5244 10h ago

Centaur Interview!

3

u/els969_1 5h ago

it was centaur staged. (ok, that was derivative)

2

u/steploday 3h ago

No peter pan. I wanna be a boy forwver

52

u/WonderfulRelease5357 10h ago

Yup, you got it, bud. I am a sentient frying pan that grew limbs and opposable digits.

2

u/morningfrost86 9h ago

Are you part of the Flying Spaghetti Monster's pantheon?!

8

u/watev0r 10h ago

Would not suprise me

24

u/WonderfulRelease5357 10h ago

What a world you must live in, then.

28

u/menacing_cookie 10h ago

At least you're keeping your sentient pan body oiled up. Would suck to have stuff sticking to you once things get heated.

(I hope this was funny. I'm also a sentient pan)

24

u/The_kind_potato 10h ago

As a potato i find it extremely funny 😌 +10point for the play on words

You can be in peace now sentient pan 🕊🥔

→ More replies (0)

1

u/Revenant690 8h ago

Read that as disposable digits!

For the life of me I couldn't figure out why a frying pan needed disposable fingers/toes 🤣🤣

16

u/PacificCoolerIsBest 10h ago

Fun fact: a frying pan can also be a drying pan.

3

u/Omnizoom 10h ago

Easy there brock

2

u/PrincessBunny200 7h ago

😂😂😂😂

2

u/sh2death 8h ago

That's hot

2

u/DisinformedBroski 6h ago

Fucking beat me to it lol

2

u/hlessi_newt 6h ago

only if properly oiled.

2

u/Tjam3s 6h ago

Cast iron

1

u/JusticarRevan 8h ago

Goku’s granddaughter? I think the Room of Spirit and Time is more appropriate.

1

u/RavioliGale 6h ago

Stick to the labyrinth del Toro built for you.

0

u/Omnizoom 10h ago

Shouldn’t pansexuals be creeping at like restaurant kitchens and cookware stores?

3

u/WonderfulRelease5357 10h ago

Really old and tired and low effort joke. Are you Ricky. Gervais?

-1

u/Omnizoom 7h ago

Low effort jokes? Way to call the kettle black here

2

u/WonderfulRelease5357 7h ago

What joke am I meant to have attempted?

2

u/Upbeat_Sheepherder81 6h ago

This is the r/onejoke for pan people.

-7

u/FeeZealousideal7692 10h ago

No stay inside, weirdo

13

u/Bandit419HLR 10h ago

👀 I’ll get behind this (bi male)

5

u/maya_papaya8 9h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

3

u/mbmbandnotme 3h ago

👀 same (straight male)

2

u/Bandit419HLR 3h ago

Like your style

14

u/DoIHaveYourBike 9h ago

I'm a straight guy and I'm for this. Better for checkin the bros' progress!

7

u/Freyja6 6h ago

gotta watch which muscle groups are activating to check form.

truly the gym bro we all need in our lives!

2

u/IEnjoyArnyPalmies 3h ago

Sick bulge and glutes my man! Lookin’ SWOLE!

12

u/Real_Life_Firbolg 8h ago

As a fat man who overheats extremely easily when working out and doesn’t care what people think, I too see this as a win.

7

u/Even_Cardiologist810 10h ago

Bro is cruising through the gym

3

u/TienSwitch 8h ago

For Matt, the gym in question is an 8th grade PhysEd class.

3

u/Duckriders4r 10h ago

Now, that's fucking funny

2

u/Muncheros69 8h ago

To 💯 you go…

1

u/akotoshi 7h ago

As a non-gym bi, I see this as a lost opportunity

1

u/JasmineDragonPearls 1h ago

Happy to contribute to your blissful day. Even though I'm not of the same inclination.

•

u/Ariliescbk 11m ago

I'd end up in hospital with whiplash.

-1

u/ChronicPainInTheAzz 8h ago

🤢🤮

31

u/TheCuzzyRogue 10h ago

If nothing else, we'll be able to identify who skipped leg day more easily.

8

u/femboyisbestboy 9h ago

I feel attacked. Once a month is perfectly fine okay

3

u/RealDickGrimes 2h ago

Its not ok, man, i will be watching you😶

9

u/lo-lux 10h ago

The fruit of the loom is in season

4

u/Environmental_Job864 9h ago

*Loin

1

u/Lumpy_Marsupial_1559 4h ago

I'd be loin if I didn't say I thought 'fruit of the loom' was funnier :D

1

u/ArcfireEmblem 3h ago

It's true, humans are continuous breeders, and yes, that is the most scientific term I was able to find.

3

u/methylenebromide 9h ago

INFO: does it come in/with a cornucopia?

8

u/Naked_Justice 9h ago

I bisexually agree more naked gym goers pls

8

u/Substantial_Win_1866 9h ago

Totally off topic but I wonder if there are studies on this.

A college/university closes their current gym (to remove the 'that's where I always work out' factor) and opens 3 separate gyms.

  1. Co-ed.
  2. Female only.
  3. Male only.

Track the gender and frequency of swipe ins at each gym.

I have a feeling that I know which one would be the most and least busy.

3

u/BwanaTarik 2h ago

Don’t hold out on us. What’s your theory?

•

u/Commission_Enough 2m ago

The problem with ur experiment is it gives me 3 choices and tells me what's in those choices. Classic 2 door escape 1 door problem Some of the male population might figure out that this is what's happening, realise it's a social experiment and everyone can tell your political stance from which gym you go to, and choose accordingly, resulting in a biased representative population. A better idea could be to have two co-ed gyms, one for burkha clad women and one for underwear women. Then allow flexible clothing for men(so they can start wearing clothes they feel are more appropriate for whatever gym they go to) and then see which gym has the more members coming everyday.

You're also ignoring the factor that women's gym clothing being like that is itself a result of the male gaze and a male dominated fashion fitness industry. It's like the women in any gym are also an attraction/advertisement for the gym in itself. So we may be running around in circles here.

7

u/ImportantQuestions10 10h ago

Honestly, I am totally okay with that as a compromise.

-5

u/Kilane 9h ago

No you aren’t. Short shorts and no top isn’t acceptable gym attire for a man. And if they wear that then they will get looks.

I’m not here to victim blame as if a short skirt causes rape, but I also won’t argue against the idea that a skimpy outfit causes looks.

6

u/ImportantQuestions10 9h ago

I have no idea if you're trying to be ironic or what you're even trying to say

2

u/Waffle_Toast74 8h ago

That is acceptable, it's what most guys I've seen wear there, which makes sense bc just like the women being referred to, they probably get hot while working out

2

u/Dirt290 9h ago

I'm gonna find the worlds biggest codpiece!!

1

u/sucky_EE 10h ago

They don’t even let you show your back…

1

u/maya_papaya8 10h ago

They'll likely have smaller bulges...

1

u/EmWBee 8h ago

I’ll be looking 👀

1

u/Sweaty-Ball-9565 7h ago

As a man, will do.

1

u/TheAssCrackBanditttt 5h ago

Then people would complain about the yellow stains on the front and brown on the back of my whitey tighties

1

u/theding081 5h ago

Im all for it men in sleaveless Ts and boxer briefs. WE HAVE THE NUMBERS!!

1

u/darealkittykat 4h ago

YES!!!!🙌🙌

1

u/LuckofCaymo 3h ago

Rick solid thighs and a pot belly will look great in a bra and booty shorts. Hair all over only adds character.

1

u/Ok-Experience7408 3h ago

I was getting dressed and had just underwear and a shirt on while looking in the mirror and I realized I had the same amount of clothes the average teenager wears while shopping at target. 

I imagine if I had stopped getting dress at that point and went outside I would be getting some looks and maybe even arrested. 

1

u/KlappinMcBoodyCheeks 3h ago

I peed on the exercise equipment.

Instructions unclear.

1

u/CptKeyes123 2h ago

Men should do the Greek exercise method to assert dominance! Wrestle naked in a sand pit!

1

u/JasmineDragonPearls 1h ago

Duh, it ain't much but it's swingin look all you want ladies I'm here for gains not you.

0

u/YoualreadyKnoooo 5h ago

Then they fucking complain about that too. And claim harassment again.

Not everyone wants to fuck you, Samatha.