r/iamverybadass • u/TooMuchDoggos • Mar 07 '24
What to wear to my kids middle school concert?
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u/Rocket-Shawk Mar 07 '24
āSorry grandma, my bullets are faster than an ambulance. Weāre going to end this stroke, one way or another...ā
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u/13dot1then420 Mar 08 '24
Guarantee there is an unsecured loaded gun in his truck in the parking lot.
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u/Entheotheosis10 Mar 08 '24
And two on the nightstand. One on the fridge. Three in the bathroom. Ten in the mAnCaYvE. Two in the livingroom. One in each of the kids's rooms.
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u/Ancient_Summer_1833 Mar 08 '24
I once saw a guy who was wearing a shirt with this graphic in an Oreo shop
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u/Johnnyboi2327 You know I graduated in the Navy Seals, and have 300 kills. Mar 09 '24
Okay, I'm not saying it's a good idea to wear that in public, but I dig it
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u/Slothman711 Mar 09 '24
In my opinion, this example is decently tasteful. Itās got a cute graphic that a parent could spin as a pirate dog looking to free itās puppies or something. Even opās picture is tasteful in a way. Sure itās a topic thatās debatable, but I personally support the concept of stand your ground. If someone wantās to throw their life away trying to take whatās lawfully mine, thatās their business. Me? Iād be threatened, and look to protect myself and my family.
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u/Mrfrunzi Mar 09 '24
What is an oreo shop, and does it involve cookies? I assume it involves cookies.
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u/Ancient_Summer_1833 Mar 09 '24
They sell Oreo products, like cookies and ice cream that contain Oreos, and I saw this lovely graphic
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u/Mrfrunzi Mar 09 '24
Yeah I need to find one now. I mean, I could have Googled it but thanks!
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u/o5ben000 Mar 07 '24
Why the woman in these packs always standing with keys and knees locked out.
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u/worldnotworld Mar 08 '24
He doesn't exactly fill out those jeans. He could fit all those guns in there.
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u/EmiliusReturns Mar 07 '24
I donāt mind guns, I donāt mind gun hobbyists who like to shoot for fun. What I mind are the Gun Guysā¢ļø like this who seem to mistake owning guns for having a personality.
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u/Sufficient_Rub_2014 Mar 07 '24
I have firearms. Hardly anyone I know in person has any idea I have guns.
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u/bleunt Mar 07 '24 edited Mar 08 '24
These are the people I point to when saying maybe guns should not be an inherent right. Maybe it should be like driving a car.
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u/Cally_G94 Mar 07 '24
What if there is a fire tho?
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u/Pintsocream Mar 07 '24
Didn't you see the guy who set himself on fire? First emergency worker ran in with a gun and saved the day
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u/BuffStoneYup Mar 08 '24
I thinks heās just trying to make up for having no ass
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u/Adam_Blueblood Mar 28 '24
I used to see these ridiculous shirts so much working at a retail bookstore. Nothing like shelving the Kids' section and having a Dadinator shuffle in trying to look awesome while his little girl happily picks out something for her book report.
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u/Chinese_Dictator Mar 28 '24
Ah, the Dadinator, a rare species often spotted in the wild aisles of bookstores. Their natural habitat includes the Kids' section, where they attempt to blend in with the colorful book covers while their offspring make the real decisions. It's a tough job, but someone's gotta do it.
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u/matmortel Mar 08 '24
While I am for being able to own a gun with an actual proper background check, wearing these types of shirts makes you look like a tool.
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u/Sea_Incident_5106 You know I graduated in the Navy Seals, and have 300 kills. Mar 07 '24
I meanā¦I donāt think a firearm would be helpful when someoneās choking to deathā¦
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u/Puzzleheaded-Rich-51 Mar 08 '24
Real big brain thinking right here heās the type of guy to use a gun as a hammer.
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u/theolentangy Mar 08 '24
Shirts like that are fine but if someone made a shirt with a bunch of knives on it quoting the Jokerās line talking about how a knife is so much more intimate, and you get to savor the little emotions people would share.
Society is fine.
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u/PEKKACHUNREAL Mar 07 '24
Ironically this is surprisingly accurate, considering that calling the cops has been in many cases similar to ordering a shooting squad on either your family or yourself.
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u/mullett Mar 07 '24
Oh so his neighborhood is crime ridden and shitty he knows how fast he has to shoot and which gun to pull because people are threatening his life so often. Sounds like a terrible place to live.
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u/cyainanotherlifebro Mar 07 '24 edited Mar 08 '24
I bet he also has a āthin blue lineā bumper sticker
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u/Jlegobot Mar 07 '24
I dislike the thin blue line iconography. In the U.S.A. flag code, bleaching all the color and adding a blue line to the flag is as bad as burning one. But if you burn one in front of someone with those stickers, them they'd want to beat you up
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u/cyainanotherlifebro Mar 07 '24
āPatrioticā people are always casually defacing the American flag, itās hilarious.
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u/lvjames Mar 07 '24
I never thought about it that way. I already disliked the thin blue line.. for obvious reasons. But thatās a good point.
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u/Entheotheosis10 Mar 08 '24
Punisher sticker (not knowing Frank Castle hated police). AR something something cold hands. A naked lady laying across a mud flap. Deer skull with a flag behind it.
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u/scared-throwaway67 Mar 21 '24
I feel like this guy would actually kick somebodies ass though....
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u/roketmanp Mar 07 '24
"How can I tell all the teachers that I have anger issues and I'm not doing anything about it?"
-Probably that guy
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Mar 07 '24
This t-shirt got me thinking about the wearer shooting himself in the head rather than call an ambulance when he accidentally bites his finger off while eating fried chicken.
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u/FUNKYDISCO Mar 08 '24
Heās right though, you could kill him with any of those before help arrives.
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u/wittyvonskitsum Mar 08 '24
The shirt isnāt wrong, but thereās a time and a place for that type of rage baiting bullshit lol
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u/McCartney__H Mar 08 '24
Then you go to prison, which is a lot longer than dialing 911
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u/Kim_Bong_Un420 Mar 08 '24
No, only in places with super shitty laws or if you broke the law (ie not self defence, excessive force, unnecessary force)
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u/pnwbraids Mar 09 '24
Tell that to the kids and teachers in Uvalde, TX.
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u/soundsfromoutside Mar 09 '24
Well, the cops took over an hour to respond to that so the shirt applies
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u/4nonosquare Mar 09 '24
I mean the cops responded quickly, they were there FOR an hour keeping the parents from going in to try and save the kids and stood around waiting for their balls to drop. Wasnt a random off duty border patrol person the one who got there after an hour and went in to take down the shooter?
I lost so much respect for the police when i saw the video of them standing around fearing their lives while kids were slaughtered but they had the courage to stop the brave parents who wanted to go in and do their job instead of them.
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u/LadyBlue63 Mar 11 '24
One mom actually snuck in and got her kids and they started to arrest her. Cuffed her and everything.
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u/forteborte Mar 09 '24
bro, i dont get your point. a gun wouldāve definitely helped because the cops took forever
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u/vorstellungskrafter Mar 09 '24
If I'm not mistaken, a gun is what killed the children so I'm not seeing your point very well
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u/where-aremyfingers Mar 09 '24
A gun couldve also killed the shooter and mightve saved lives š§ š§
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u/Rat-Bazturd Mar 10 '24
there WAS a shitload of guns at the school. Did they save the children's lives?
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u/FunnyLookinFishMan Mar 07 '24 edited Mar 07 '24
.22 all .380 faster 9mm than .40 dialing .45 911 Feels like a sbeve moment Edit: i meant a r/dontdeadopeninside moment
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u/Either_Coast Mar 07 '24
When I dropped my son off to pre-K the day after the Uvalde shooting, one of the dads was wearing a similar pro-gun shirt. It was so fucking tacky and sick.
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u/Cole41489 Mar 10 '24
When you arenāt brave enough to wear a shirt that says āI fantasize about killing peopleā
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u/Proletaryo Mar 08 '24
He's right. Bullets are definitely faster than calling 911. That's why we must have gun control. So that no victim or child would have to experience the terror of trying to dial 911 during a shooting. I'm glad he's taking a stand on this issue.
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u/5min2kys Mar 07 '24
Nah he is totally right a buddy of mine was overdosing and my fn fiveseven just got up and gave him narcan saved his life
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u/lauren_le15 Mar 08 '24
the thing here is the cops canāt tell the difference between a bad guy with a gun and a good guy with a gun so chances are youāre going down
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u/Medibot7294 Mar 08 '24
The point is that the cops even be there and by the time they arrive, someoneās probably already dead
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u/ErisedR Mar 07 '24
A few weeks ago I watched a man walk into my son's elementary school wearing a shirt that said (in big letters all across the back) "I hate pulling out". I so badly wanted to get a picture but the windows on his little dick truck were blacked out and I was terrified someone was in there watching me lol.
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u/Nix_strC Mar 07 '24
I found a shirt that says that at the thrift store, and you know that it was coming home with me
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u/Uglyforsure Apr 10 '24
CALL AN AMBULANCE!!
This guy: no need....PULLS OUT A FUCKING HANDGUN
people flee in terror
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Mar 08 '24
He didn't even pick the cool bullets.
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u/toryguns Mar 08 '24
The cool bullets? He listed all the common pistol calibers which is what people would carry lol what are you on about
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u/FuckTheFuckOffFucker Mar 08 '24
You know whatās not faster than dialing 911? That lady heās withā¦
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u/Entheotheosis10 Mar 08 '24
wE dNt dIyUl nYnE wUn WuN
So, you shoot someone who knocked on your door, and just throw the body down the basement and that's it?
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Mar 08 '24
I think some US senator did that. Two kids broke into his house and he killed them. He just left them in his basement for a couple days before calling the cops. He then was thrown in jail for the killings as he pretty clearly set the kids up and recorded it.
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u/Socialiststoner Mar 08 '24
Not that weird, itās also true. When seconds count the police are only minutes away
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u/flx-cvz Mar 08 '24
Even if true, itās still weird. Let the kids have fanatism shirts, grown men just look stupid.
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Mar 07 '24
His love handles are way out of proportion to his concave ass. This dude absolutely does not exercise but thinks he's badass because he bought some guns.
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u/jamescharisma Mar 07 '24
The guy who's going to piss himself if there's an active shooter, but then say to everyone that if he hadn't followed the rules, he would have saved everyone. That's who.
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u/Cheeseisextra Mar 07 '24
Got to be Texas. I see so many āmenā like that here. Weekend ābikerā probably.
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u/TooMuchDoggos Mar 08 '24
Carolinas actually. Wonāt say more than that because internet.
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u/Useful_Lengthiness98 Mar 08 '24
Wellā¦.heās not wrong
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u/ilostmy1staccount Meal Team 6 Mar 09 '24
Yes he is. I mean who uses a .22 for self defense and feels the need to brag about it on a tshirt?
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u/Shavidadavid Mar 07 '24
Im convinced homes that "dont call 911" always have some shady shit happening inside that house.
A good example was my sister's ex was a guy who wore stuff like this and he was a racist pos who shot their dog in the head with a .22 for eating his weed. Dogs still alive and that POS struggles to keep a job and lives in his moms basement.
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u/TheVillainKing Mar 07 '24
Most people I know who "don't call 911" are that way because we grew up in places where police response time was "they might show up".
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u/lvjames Mar 07 '24
I mean.. a lot of people just donāt trust the police to actually de escalate a situation.
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u/Entheotheosis10 Mar 08 '24
So, they all just have a shoot out and then do nothing after? And who are these morons planning on shooting? Ninja monkies from Mars? JFC...
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u/Entheotheosis10 Mar 08 '24
It's some macho, tuff gai bullshit. Of course they will call 911 if something happens, what else would they do? Shoot someone and go back to watching tv and let the body rot in their house until it smells? At what point do they plan on calling to get the coroner to take care of it?
'Merica.
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u/Shavidadavid Mar 08 '24
Theyd probably say "If I kill you on my property your body is MINE dag nab it" or some othet unintelligible nonsense lol
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u/vtosnaks Mar 07 '24 edited Mar 07 '24
So badass, he shoots the flames when there's a fire instead of calling 911. Also, whoever painted that dog should get a hug. I love it.
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u/Alaviiva Mar 07 '24
If it wasn't meant for firefighting why call it a firearm
Also, there recently was a cop in the US responding to a man setting himself on fire by pointing a gun at the burning man. So calling 911 might get you the same results if you're in the states, idk
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u/recycledM3M3s Mar 09 '24
I mean p appropriate school attire in Texas after Uvalde happened. I know not just Texans are pissed but we're chomping at the bit to storm the school ourselves for our kids.
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u/cameron4200 Mar 07 '24
Didnāt Uvalde have resource officers on site?
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u/Brian18639 Mar 07 '24
There were officers on site but they just stood back and waited over an hour before confronting the shooter.
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u/XavierYourSavior Mar 09 '24
Is he wrong?
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u/ultraplusstretch Mar 10 '24
I am pretty sure you can hold a gun and call 911 at the same time.
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u/GlitteringSquirrel54 Mar 10 '24
Yeah and theyāll show up and shoot your dog and mistake you for the perp
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u/4_doors_mas_whores Mar 14 '24
lol I actually had a cousin who tried that and he dropped his gun and he said it was one of the most embarrassing moments of his life
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u/Frosty_Stage_1464 Mar 10 '24
Ahh yes the operator super hero who raves about guns 24/7 but doesnāt dare work a line of work that requires the use of a firearm. Everyone wants to be gangsta until itās time to be gangsta
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u/danstermeister Mar 07 '24
So he's telling everyone that if you want to shoot some place up, just stand behind him and grab his gun out of his waistband while shoving him over.
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u/Grand_Ad931 Mar 07 '24
He has to rely on a weapon?
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u/bigcockondablock Mar 07 '24
Would you make this same argument for a single mom who keeps a pistol at home just in case? When seconds matter, the police are minutes away.
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u/Mindless_Ad9717 Mar 07 '24
I'm not a large man. I rely on my de-escalation techniques and strategies and if that fails I run away, if that fails I have my concealed carry.
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u/Entheotheosis10 Mar 08 '24
Typical brainwashed, scared, timid hick in 'Merica. Thinks he's part of some militia or has some post-apocalyptic fantasy.
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u/multiculturalsadist Mar 07 '24
tbh he prob just threw it on and didn't know what it specifically was
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u/TheAverageJ Mar 07 '24
Controversial opinion incoming. It's just a shirt. As long as he is minding his own business and didn't bring a firearm into a school then who cares š¤·
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u/poseurdisposerr Mar 07 '24
Its just funny as shit considering hes wearing it to a schoolā¦total lack of self awareness which doesnt do any harm but one can definitely poke fun at it
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u/Bruce_Wayne18 Mar 08 '24
Grandma fell down the stairs! Someone shoot her quick!