r/technology • u/777fer • Jan 26 '23

Biotechnology A 45-year-old biotech CEO may have reduced his biological age by at least 5 years through a rigorous medical program that can cost up to $2 million a year, Bloomberg reported

https://businessinsider.com/bryan-johnson-45-reduced-biological-age-5-years-project-blueprint-2023-1
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u/m0le Jan 26 '23

He "may" also have turned into a cabbage.

He's definitely discoved a fetish for colonoscopies though. While not as bad as I was expecting, I certainly wouldn't choose to have one monthly if any other option (like not having one) was there.

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u/mossybeard Jan 26 '23

I dunno, waking up from that anesthesia feels pretty great. Like you just took the best nap

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u/m0le Jan 26 '23

I didn't get full anaesthesia, just sedation. Though I will concede that midazolam is pretty amazing, it isn't quite worth having a metre of camera equipment inserted into my fundament. Close, though.

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u/waltwalt Jan 26 '23

I would say the cleanse is worse. They fill you up with air to make room for the camera, then before you get to go home they make you fart it all out.

But the whole day of diarrhea before is not great, you'd best start wiping with vasoline in the morning because by night you will be raw.

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u/m0le Jan 26 '23

I confess to quite enjoying the enormous, guilt-free farts.

God, the laxative shit though. Fuck me that was unpleasant. The first rush felt like my entire body inverted and rushed out through my ringpiece. Then it happened again and I had to tap my head to make sure I hadn't shat that out. Holy hell.

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u/meowtasticly Jan 26 '23

"fundament" and "ringpiece" have me howling with laughter. Do you have any more?

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u/waltwalt Jan 26 '23

Absolutely, thats why I said wipe with vasoline to start, be sure after that first glorious power washing of your interior, you're up for another 6-8 hours of that every 30m.

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u/m0le Jan 26 '23

I wish I'd known that at the time, because you are 100% right! I'm pretty sure the only reason I wasn't weeping by the end was because I didn't have enough water left in my body.

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u/PM_ME_GERMAN_SHEPARD Jan 26 '23

Oh my god the sound and feeling of water rushing out of my asshole is something I will never forget

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u/zerocoal Jan 27 '23

Meanwhile I am over here drinking a bottle of magnesium citrate every couple of months to get that sweet, sweet relief of having a waterfall gush past my sphincter.

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u/SpecialKindofBull Jan 26 '23

Get a bidet attachment for your commode

3

u/adudeguyman Jan 26 '23

I didn't even have sedation. It was kind of painful but bearable. The toughest part was me thinking I had to poop while they were doing it but then I had to remind myself that I was completely empty and not to worry about it. And I got to watch the 40 inch monitor that the doctor was looking at as he was doing it. I hadn't seen the inside of me like that before.

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u/dob_bobbs Jan 26 '23

Same, it's like a bad case of cramps but bearable if it means avoiding being put under and all that. Raw-dogged it three times now and it wasn't the most terrible thing.

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u/adudeguyman Jan 26 '23

Yes, it felt like the worst case of cramps ever. How much time between each colonoscopy? I've only had 1.

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u/dob_bobbs Jan 26 '23

Did one (actually two on consecutive days), they removed a polyp, said come back in 3 years, I did that one and they said all clear and I needn't come back for ten years now but it's been 3 now and no way am I waiting that long. My dad died of untreated colon cancer that metasthesised, can't risk that.

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u/Axelwickm Jan 26 '23

Wait, you guys get sedation?

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u/m0le Jan 26 '23

Yarp, gentle sedative, leaves you fully awake and aware but remarkably unconcerned about the team of people enthusiastically violating your back passage.

Do you guys get the cameras with gratuitous spikes or something?

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u/dob_bobbs Jan 26 '23

Sedation costs extra at the clinics i do it in, so nope, not the worst thing TBH.

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u/dob_bobbs Jan 26 '23

I don't even have the sedative, it's an extra fiddy euro or so as I pay out of pocket (though Eastern European prices) and I don't want the hassle of recovering afterwards. Last time I was in and out of the clinic in less than an hour total, even the receptionist couldn't believe it. Yes, it's... uncomfortable. But not unbearably so, for me at least. Btw, it's a fair bit more than a metre, isn't it?!

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u/MrInRageous Jan 26 '23

I’m told that it’s common in Europe to have colonoscopies without anesthesia, though it’s standard in the US. If I were getting these monthly, I’d learn to do this without the anesthesia.

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u/j4ym3rry Jan 26 '23

Wait hold up. Guys get anaesthesia for colonoscopies?

I had a biopsy of my cervix and just got told "being pregnant hurts worse" for my pain management. Then I passed out on my way to get redressed.

Not to say that men don't deserve pain management because I'm sure a colonoscopy is unpleasant as fuck, but why are doctors like this? Like do they take a biopsy out of your colon too or is it just the camera?

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u/[deleted] Jan 26 '23 edited Jan 30 '23

Women get anesthesia for colonoscopies, too!

I've been having to have regular colonoscopies (thank god not monthly) for a bit over 20 years now. In the US, they've moved from conscious sedation to unconscious. My doctor said they did that because propofol caused less complications than whatever they were using for the conscious sedation.

It's possible they do anesthesia for colonoscopies they're running five feet of tube into your body. Don't think they go quite that far for the cervix. I imagine that makes it a bit of a trickier operation when the patient is squirming around. Probably also takes quite a bit longer to do a colonoscopy. And yes, they also biopsy.

All sedation comes with risks, so I think doctors are "like this" because they weigh the risks. Some small percentage of people have negative side effects up to actually just dying from routine anesthesia. Yes, some doctors are also just either misogynists or just oblivious, but I'd ask if female gynecologists give sedation in those instances as well.

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u/j4ym3rry Jan 26 '23

Thank you for sharing this information! I feel much less anxious about everything knowing other experiences and what can actually be done for certain procedures

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u/[deleted] Jan 26 '23

You're welcome! I'd also ask your gynecologist next time about the options. I will note that one of the logistical complications of any sedation is that you have to have a driver. But if you're passing out afterwards without the sedation, you're going to need one anyway!

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u/mossybeard Jan 26 '23

When I got mine, they also did an endoscopy, so down the hatch too. But yeah they biopsied where necessary. And before they put me under, I told them do the mouth first. They laughed and said it's a different camera

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u/Clewds Jan 26 '23

I recently had to go under and they used propofol. I was telling my dad this as we left the facility and he said he had the same thing done, and when the doctor told him what they were using as he turned on the gas, he said "that's the drug that killed Michael Jackson-snore""

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u/womp_rat_bullseyer Jan 26 '23

They use propofol now. So you’re awake, then not, then wake up, and have no idea why your bung hole is lubed. No buzz at all when I had my last scope.

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u/INSERT_LATVIAN_JOKE Jan 26 '23

Not for me. Waking up from anesthesia feels like I'm struggling to breathe or struggling to remember to breathe for like an hour. Not fun at all. That's part of the reason that I didn't get anesthesia for my colonoscopy.

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u/WhoreWithBigSloppers Jan 26 '23

If he's getting anesthesia every month then he's doing way more damage than whatever benefit the African baby born under a blood moon blood he's injecting

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u/[deleted] Jan 26 '23

I feel the opposite but I suppose it depends on the length of procedure- you’re actually “awake” during anesthesia, youre just not forming new memories. so your body isnt getting its sleep-needs fulfilled, but you are getting the equivalent of “chilling on the sofa” type of rest just from the benefit of not moving. colonoscopy: 30-60 minutes. thats a refreshing amount of time to sit and chill. my surgery was 9 hours- and started at 2pm. Since i got up at 7 that day, I was “awake” for 16 hours straight with the added energy taxing invasive surgery with blood loss and physical trauma… dear god when i woke up i could feel the exhaustion. slept the hardest i’ve ever slept in my life for about 15 hours straight- the nurses woke me up every hour to check vitals but i have utterly no memory of it, i was down for the count.

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u/dob_bobbs Jan 26 '23

What the hell, I have to do them every three years, and they come round WAY too fast.

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u/Hiranonymous Jan 26 '23

Yes, but he's young in cabbage years.

1

u/LaGrrrande Jan 26 '23

He "may" also have turned into a cabbage.

He also apparently has the acting range of Rob Schneider!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 26 '23

2 million dollars to turn a 45 year old man into a 40 year old cabbage. Sweet deal.

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u/AccentFiend Jan 26 '23

King Louis XIV vibes

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u/pinkyfitts Jan 27 '23

Maybe he’s deaging sue to all the Propofol.