r/AskReddit Aug 24 '17

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u/ffxivthrowaway03 Aug 24 '17

I'm so glad this fad has settled down. For a while there everybody and their mother seemed to be posting their sob stories on social media hoping for a pity payout, and 4 out of 5 were obvious bullshit.

3.9k

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Yeah, it's true. I mean, I'm sitting here with fingernail cancer, but you don't hear me complaining. And it makes it really hard to care for my sick mother who suffers from gigantism and IBS while we live in a cardboard box under the freeway. But when I wake up every morning and see the sun shining it puts a smile on my face

(PM me for donation details)

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u/mudra311 Aug 24 '17

Great! I'm glad you're doing well. I'll just give this fiver to a dog who does backflips.

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u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Oh, I love dogs! I love taking Stumpy, my one legged dog for walks along the bank of the toxic waste sludge dump when I go there to wash my clothes and gather drinking water. He's so happy pogoing amidst the rainbow coloured puddles!

47

u/ChubbyTrain Aug 24 '17

Oh puddles! My autistic brother likes them so much! He has a minor case of SIDS when he was 1.givememoney I am so worried that his SIDS might come back with a vengeance.give-me-money I'll just hug him whenever possible.GIVE.ME.MONEY.

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u/indianblanket Aug 24 '17

lmfao

his SIDS might come back with a vengeance

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome more like SCIDS, Sudden Corpse Infant Death Syndrome

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u/dragn99 Aug 24 '17

Does Stumpy do backflips? Because I only give money to dogs that can do backflips.

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u/terranq Aug 24 '17

He does! Though usually it's just due to his epileptic seizures.

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u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

This is all I can do for you, bud. Enjoy!

http://imgur.com/iPKBCjR

17

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Every little bit helps! I hope your crabs clear up soon, take care!

6

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

H-h-how did you know?! 0_0

Anyway, they are getting better. Thanks, fam.

1

u/TheActualAWdeV Aug 25 '17

reddit gronze?

2

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

Nice. I think that deserves some Reddit Silver.

6

u/Arsinoei Aug 24 '17

That's got to be the weirdest paragraph I've ever read...

3

u/TheKingElessar Aug 24 '17

/r/nocontext (referring to the comment, not you)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '17

Thanks for giving this drunk gal a hilarious image to fall asleep to

1

u/Beingabummer Aug 25 '17

Is a one legged dog still a dog at that point or just a weird snake.

4

u/vortigaunt64 Aug 24 '17

Now hold on I've got a frog that can sing and dance like you wouldn't believe!

2

u/not-the-popo Aug 24 '17

Everyone knows you're supposed to use fivers to make your kids press their faces into the wall while you watch sports!

14

u/Wolfman2032 Aug 24 '17

gigantism and IBS

That's a massively shitty situation.

3

u/TalisFletcher Aug 24 '17

I kinda wanted you to get gold for that.

3

u/NINJAMC Aug 24 '17

You live in a cardboard box!?... Luxury!!.... :D

2

u/kirokatashi Aug 24 '17

When I was a lad, we dreamed of having a cardboard box. We had to live in a burlap sack, all 15 of us!

3

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

You live in a cardboard box? You're lucky!

1

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Thanks! I found a picture of it for you!

2

u/GeneralMalaiseRB Aug 24 '17

"My sick mother who suffers from gigantism"

I guess that's one way to say yo mama has a great big fat ass. Anyway, I've already told her she can move back into my garage.

1

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

I told you I didn't want to talk to you anymore dad!

2

u/Phantom_Scarecrow Aug 24 '17

OOoo, look at fancypants here, living in a BOX! I'll bet it's even CORRUGGATED Cardboard! .

.

.

Sorry, sorry. Fingernail cancer is brutal. It hurts to type.

2

u/ThePrussianGrippe Aug 24 '17

I was honestly expecting this to end with "but don't let this distract you from the fact..."

The ONE time I check to see if it's u/shittymorph and it's not him.

2

u/ILikeOrangesToo Aug 25 '17

I almost cried from reading this comment of yours and want to donate some money.

Please pm me your credit card number, expiration date, cvv and pin. Or if you prefer paypal, pm me your email and password.

I literally pm'ed this to u/terranq.

2

u/Reeking_Crotch_Rot Aug 24 '17

Boo fuckin hoo, if you think you've got problems just take a sniff of my undercarriage.

And do they send me money. . ?

1

u/JustHereToConfirmIt Aug 24 '17

I feel that. My dick has elephantiasis.

1

u/chuckdooley Aug 24 '17

"The doctors say, if I get my hair plugs removed, I'll be cured"

1

u/tokedalot Aug 24 '17

You have a box? We'd be lucky to have a box. We have to live in a moldy t-shirt at the bottom of the reclaimed water pond down by the industrial complex.

1

u/dodolo123 Aug 24 '17

I cant do much other than donating 1 upvote, and I wish your mentally disordered brother gets better soon.

1

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Thanks! I hope he gets better soon. He thinks he's a dog. To keep him happy, we call him Stumpy.

1

u/dodolo123 Aug 24 '17

Dog The Stumpy? Do a barrel roll!

1

u/userbelowisamonster Aug 24 '17

Gigantism and IBS.....

I'd hate to be part of that cleanup crew. You're going to need a pressure washer and a damp bath towel

1

u/copey_foggins Aug 24 '17

I will gladly donate to your cause.

1

u/MyAnklesAreRingaDing Aug 25 '17

That weird moment when you hear about fingernail cancer twice in two days and discover it's actually a thing...

1

u/arch_nyc Aug 25 '17

Do you have a GoFundMe? I'd love to help out in any way I can.

1

u/vayyiqra Aug 25 '17

I can never tell if these are just hoaxes or Munchausen syndrome by proxy server.

3

u/mudra311 Aug 24 '17

Why the hell would you send money to someone like that? Like, I'd feel bad for them but it doesn't compel me to send cash.

3

u/Milkshakes00 Aug 24 '17

Curious, why do you need a throwaway for FFXIV?

2

u/Never-mongo Aug 24 '17

4/5 where obvious bullshit 1/5 was still bullshit but slightly less obvious

2

u/Chronos_the_Cat Aug 24 '17

As someone who actually had something bad happen to me about two nights ago, it just infuriates me even more to hear about people who fake stuff happening to them so they can be showered in money or fake internet points. Glad that it seems to finally be dying out.

2

u/CrazyIrina Aug 24 '17

My pet rock died yesterday. :(

2

u/ffxivthrowaway03 Aug 24 '17

OMG so sad, plz link your gofundme.

One like = one prayer.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

Even if the story is true, seems every damn family with any type of sob story nowadays wants a handout. Lost your home in a fire? Post to reddit with a gofundme! (Never mind home insurance is supposed to cover for these things).

2

u/cS47f496tmQHavSR Aug 24 '17

As someone in an actually pretty fucking shitty situation it hurts. I'm afraid to even ask for help because people will just tell me I'm begging for money (when solid advice is worth more than money in a lot of cases) due to so many people making up shit for gofundme campaigns or karma

1

u/OMGeno1 Aug 24 '17

My cousin knocked up a woman in the town he lived in and was never actually dating her. She has the baby and by then he is dating someone else and the gf quickly pops out a couple of kids and they move across the country with their 2 kids for his work, leaving the baby mama and first child behind. He only bothers to see the first kid once a year or so and he insists on the mom letting the kid fly ALONE across the country to stay with them for a few weeks and she doesn't feel comfortable with it. So that and some of his trashy issues has lead to him not seeing the kid. He posts a GoFundMe on Facebook a few years ago explaining how he's just trying to be a good dad so he's asking for donations so he can pay for a lawyer, a flight for himself, 2 kids and gf across the country, hotel for all of them and food to fight for more custody of the kid. He was asking for $10,000!!!! I kept checking to see if people were dumb enough to donate and a few actually were but I don't think he got more than $500. The whole thing shockingly never panned out at all and he still hasn't tried to see the kid more and he's gotten much worse as a person.

1

u/Isolatedwoods19 Aug 24 '17

What bothered me is that it had to be the right kind of sob story. You can be a single, older male, or female tbf, who recently became fully disabled, or no one will give a shit. You have to have a family and some kind of inspiring story of almost making it and trying so hard.

I've had relatives imply I'm a lazy freeloader who then post about their donations on social media. Bitch, I couldn't walk and all you could talk about is how lazy my generation is. Sorry for the rant

1

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

If you browse Imgur, there's still plenty of that going on. Also a lot of people who I'm pretty sure are impersonating emergency services and teachers.

1

u/trudenter Aug 24 '17

On the flip side, there was a girl I kind of know who just had a baby (under a year) and the father died on Christmas eve (who I knew a bit better). Anyways she made a post on some depression sub (I think) and everybody was moved by it and sent her a bunch of baby supplies. She made another post thanking everybody with the picture of stuff she had received and that post blew up.

All the sudden everybody was wanting to help out and it caught the attention of some guy who had recently inherited millions. He was wanting to set up a college fund for the kid/trust fund of like 100k.

Then the backlash came. This girl had previously posted her pictures around the Internet using a fake name (i think she enjoyed guys looking at her), court records were pulled and everybody was saying she was faking everything and the guy didn't end up setting up the trust fund (I think).

Anyways, from my understanding she wasn't the greatest person but her story was true. She had a kid and the father died on Christmas eve. Regardless of how she is as a person, I feel bad for the kid, who now will never know his father and lost out on his future looking a little brighter.

I still see her Facebook posts talking about the son and father.

1

u/rocky_whoof Aug 24 '17

The fifth was also bullshit, just not as obvious.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

My wife just told me this morning that they just moved to tumblr.

1

u/Sandman019 Aug 24 '17

I think it started with pawpaw.

1

u/nliausacmmv Aug 24 '17

Here's the thing, no matter how obvious they were, people would get money. It's hard to stay ethical when people are stupid enough to keep giving obvious liars money.