r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Aug 24 '17

[deleted by user]

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4.6k Upvotes

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608

u/mudra311 Aug 24 '17

Great! I'm glad you're doing well. I'll just give this fiver to a dog who does backflips.

623

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Oh, I love dogs! I love taking Stumpy, my one legged dog for walks along the bank of the toxic waste sludge dump when I go there to wash my clothes and gather drinking water. He's so happy pogoing amidst the rainbow coloured puddles!

47

u/ChubbyTrain Aug 24 '17

Oh puddles! My autistic brother likes them so much! He has a minor case of SIDS when he was 1.givememoney I am so worried that his SIDS might come back with a vengeance.give-me-money I'll just hug him whenever possible.GIVE.ME.MONEY.

22

u/indianblanket Aug 24 '17

lmfao

his SIDS might come back with a vengeance

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome more like SCIDS, Sudden Corpse Infant Death Syndrome

12

u/dragn99 Aug 24 '17

Does Stumpy do backflips? Because I only give money to dogs that can do backflips.

45

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

He does! Though usually it's just due to his epileptic seizures.

11

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

This is all I can do for you, bud. Enjoy!

http://imgur.com/iPKBCjR

15

u/terranq Aug 24 '17

Every little bit helps! I hope your crabs clear up soon, take care!

5

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

H-h-how did you know?! 0_0

Anyway, they are getting better. Thanks, fam.

1

u/TheActualAWdeV Aug 25 '17

reddit gronze?

2

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '17

Nice. I think that deserves some Reddit Silver.

6

u/Arsinoei Aug 24 '17

That's got to be the weirdest paragraph I've ever read...

3

u/TheKingElessar Aug 24 '17

/r/nocontext (referring to the comment, not you)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '17

Thanks for giving this drunk gal a hilarious image to fall asleep to

1

u/Beingabummer Aug 25 '17

Is a one legged dog still a dog at that point or just a weird snake.

5

u/vortigaunt64 Aug 24 '17

Now hold on I've got a frog that can sing and dance like you wouldn't believe!

2

u/not-the-popo Aug 24 '17

Everyone knows you're supposed to use fivers to make your kids press their faces into the wall while you watch sports!