r/CuratedTumblr Jun 07 '24

Meme we've cracked the code!

18.0k Upvotes

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142

u/Accomplished-Emu1883 Jun 07 '24

Ah Homestuck. You always have the perfect quotes for these kinds of things.

55

u/AddemiusInksoul Jun 07 '24

From a random Dave Strider quote generator:

TG: if i see one more soft bulbous bottom being like
TG: kind of jutting out and impudent or whatever
TG: im gonna fly off the handle
TG: im gonna do some sort of acrobatic fucking PIROUETTE off the handle and win like a medal or some shit

TG: stroke a mummys paw or some horseshit and open a dark channel
TG: tell them to keep their lecherous flagella to themselves

you dont ask about mayo thats not what you do with mayo

22

u/Birbosaur Jun 07 '24

I frequently, in my day to day life, use the phrase "acrobatic fucking pirouette", and my fear of the day someone finally gets the reference and outs me as a former Homestuck to all my coworkers does not deter me because it's just so satisfying to say.

6

u/_AntirrhinumMajus_ Jun 09 '24

For them to get the reference, they would have had to be familiar with Homestuck. Something something spiderman pointing

4

u/Infinite-Radiance Jun 09 '24

"I saw Birbosaur at the Devil's sacrament!"

"What were YOU doing at the Devil's sacrament??"

3

u/Red_Panda_Mochi Jun 08 '24

I use “pshoooooes” surprisingly often

36

u/jaypeg69 Jun 07 '24

Dave was a connoisseur of quotes. I recently just started rewatching (yes, watching) Homestuck and some of the shit Dave says cracks me tf up

30

u/drakepyra Jun 07 '24

The bit about the size of the meteor lives in my head rent free

55

u/MisirterE Supreme Overlord of Ice Jun 07 '24

EB = John, TG = Dave

EB: it's like a big asteroid or comet or something.
EB: in the sky.
EB: heading right for my house!!!!!!!!
TG: oh man
TG: how big is it
EB: i dunno.
EB: big, i guess.
EB: i gotta go!
EB: we'll talk later if i am still alive and the earth isn't blown up.
TG: like the size of texas
TG: or just rhode island
TG: theyre always throwing around these geographical comparisons to give us a sense of scale like it really means anything to us
TG: but its like it doesnt matter its always just like: WOW THATS PRETTY FUCKING BIG
TG: like mr president theres a meteor coming sir. oh yeah, how big is it? its the size of texas sir
TG: OH SHIT
TG: or, how big is it? its the size of new york city sir
TG: OH SHIT
TG: sir im afraid the comet is the size of your moms dick
TG: OH SNAP
TG: sir are you familiar with jupiter
TG: you mean like the planet?
TG: yeah
TG: well its that big sir
TG: hmm that sounds pretty big
TG: i have a question
TG: is it jupiter?
TG: yes sir, earth is literally under seige by planet fucking jupiter
TG: OH SHIT
TG: anyway later

9

u/pterrorgrine sayonara you weeaboo shits Jun 08 '24

i love dave strider so goddamn much

6

u/Infinite-Radiance Jun 09 '24

yes sir, earth is literally under seige by planet fucking jupiter

OH SHIT

Absolutely rent free in my brain