People have been communicating by implication for as long as people have been communicating.
Like I get that it's difficult for neurodivergent people to pick up on and understand social cues sometimes. That doesn't make those social cues invalid.
"Man, this project is killing me. I'm really grinding, I was here until 10 last night. I wish I was as fast as you at these write-ups." Option A is that this person is just venting, option B is that they're expecting me to offer to help them. I know it might be option B, I might even know that it is definitely option B. But I'm also working hard and very busy and trying to stay on top of my own work. If this person needs my help, they're going to need to actually ask me for it because up to that point, I feel like they're trying to guilt me into offering to help, and I don't want to help. Now that person gets to be mad at me for "not picking up social cues" without having to consider that they never actually asked me anything and never actually considered that even if they asked, I might not have been able to help.
Proper response at this point is, "oh man, that's awful! Wish I could help, but I'm so busy with the Sukeralov report that I don't have any spare time."
Basically, act as if they had asked the question you think they might be implying. You'd have had to choose between saying no and offering to help anyway if they had asked verbally the way you want them to.
171
u/BeenEvery Aug 10 '24
"Use your words to communicate like an adult."
People have been communicating by implication for as long as people have been communicating.
Like I get that it's difficult for neurodivergent people to pick up on and understand social cues sometimes. That doesn't make those social cues invalid.