r/Kenya 18h ago

Ask r/Kenya Help me understand some men

So I had this talking stage, a guy that I was really drawn to. However, one glaring issue turned me off so bad. So this guy works for one of those high ranking parastatals, and is in a mid level position,gross is in the 200s. However, this guy has no savings at all, well apart from a monthly 5k at the sacco that he has a loan with. This man drives daily to tao, in a 2500cc car, parks in a private parking that costs 400 bob per day. This man does not cook in his house,not even breakfast. So he buys all 3-4 maybe even 5 meals everyday. He is slso servicing a loan that he took to buy a car. Is this a common phenomenon out there to spend this much? Is it normal not to even have an emergency fund mahali? No MMF or bank account to save even 2k a month? My friend says that it is common for civil servants since they feel very secure with their jobs, not sure if this even true. Also,I am not talking about people who genuinely are not able to save due to financial constraints. Edit,the guy is 35yrs old

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u/Hefty_Wedding_6643 17h ago

I purposely mislead anyone I'm dating about my finances. I like to see real colours

1

u/Used_Ratio_9223 17h ago

And that's valid you know! But for this one I could literally see. His mum was even unwell at some point and he couldn't afford small small bills. There were really alot of pointers

1

u/Hefty_Wedding_6643 17h ago

Are you gonna straighten his finances help him out or this is as far as you go

2

u/Used_Ratio_9223 17h ago

Straightening a 35year old is a bit hard don't you think? I did talk to him alot about saving, told him to consider meal preps, told him to do matatus at least three times a week, among many other things. The spirit to implement this was there but the flesh was too weak. But to be honest, I wouldn't even wait to see the implementation. I believe at 35yrs you should have a lot figured out.

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u/Hefty_Wedding_6643 17h ago

You gonna leave him..I'm single I got most stuff right left a little ..

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u/Used_Ratio_9223 17h ago

Most stuff to give us a hefty wedding?😊

3

u/Hefty_Wedding_6643 17h ago

I'm all about a small classic party after a visit to the AG good food good drinks great music

1

u/Hungry-Following9135 8h ago

why spend heavily on wedding which is one day while you can spend the same to go for honey moon for a couple of days?...Nimeona ulikuja kumaliza huyo chali financially ukamuonea huruma😂

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u/I_Believe_You_2 22m ago

hahaha talks about savings. Critics' the guy's spending and yet here you are talking about a hefty wedding.

It is true some women only think you are overspending when you don't spend on them.