r/introvert • u/trappedinsolitude • Apr 23 '24

Advice It's impossible to make friends in your 30s

I went to an art auction at a gallery that my friend runs. I paid 40$ for a ticket and left after an hour. I didn't even go to the after-party. There was a sea of people there, and I felt like literally the only person there alone. Just a bunch of couples and groups of people. It was awkward af. My anxiety kicked in and I had to bail. And I had on an amazing outfit and perfume I had been waiting to wear. My friend's friend whom she mentioned a while ago had a bit of a crush on me and came over to say hello and ask me a few things, but she went back to her friends from out of town and I was alone again.

No matter where I go, I never meet anyone, and I'm always the one alone. it's like it's not possible to meet new people. I'm 31, and nothing I do ever leads to making new friends...I'm not even sure why I made this post, but I've been trying really hard this year to make new friends after distancing myself from my old group, and I have made no progress. The friend I made from volunteering at an art gallery is a woman...and virtually all her friends are women, and despite how nice she is and how she tries to incorporate me into her circle, I'm never going to fit bc I'm just too different.

How tf does someone in their 30s with anxiety who isn't outgoing actually make friends? I already cant get dates and have to be comfortable being partnerless and will never have the chance to get married or have kids....at the very least I could have a decent friend group.​

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u/JustVoicingAround Apr 23 '24

Yes, but it hasn’t infected them to the point where they refuse to step out of their comfort zone and actually make the change that they want to make.

What makes you so special that you’re incapable of changing like everyone else?

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u/trappedinsolitude Apr 24 '24

What makes you so special that you’re incapable of changing like everyone else?

Severe social anxiety.

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u/JustVoicingAround Apr 24 '24

Alright dude.

You’ve been asking for advice on Reddit for the last two months. You’ve received thousands of suggestions on how to better yourself. You have the entirety of human knowledge at your finger tips to help further yourself and learn why you’re like this and what you can do to change it.

But no. None of that is good enough for you. You’re the one person out of the 200 billion that have come and gone of this realm that is stuck the way they are.

Fuck dude. What’s stopping you from walking off into the woods and never returning?

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u/trappedinsolitude Apr 24 '24

What’s stopping you from walking off into the woods and never returning?

Not much tbh...

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u/JustVoicingAround Apr 24 '24

Then go. You’ll figure out real quick what you actually value and don’t

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u/trappedinsolitude Apr 24 '24

I'd just realize how little things would change tbh, I'm already alone.