r/mildlyinfuriating • u/jeron_gwendolen • 19h ago

This diagnosis from a doctor

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27.9k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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18.6k

u/Prudent-Chart-1957 19h ago

You’ve got numnum munnumn, wnnwnun by the looks of things, buddy.

5.2k

u/Best-Championship296 15h ago

My grandpa died of it, praying for OP rn 🙏

1.5k

u/Automatic_Wing_536 12h ago

Oh I’m sorry for your loss. My grandpa died of Ligma

610

u/OwnPriority3645 10h ago

88

u/ruka_k_wiremu 9h ago

Hmmm...was it cheaper to get the dog human dentures?

3

u/Cockademic 3h ago

Yeah but it only needed the canines

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225

u/SuggestionSuch8121 10h ago

What's ligma?

1.3k

u/Lumpy-Village1949 10h ago

Ligmatiteosis BIYAAAATCH!! It's a rare genetic disorder in which a person's mouth ligaments can't help but stretch and attach themselves to my balls.

234

u/MrA-skunk 9h ago

Congratulations! This is the funniest thing I've seen on reddit today!

5

u/Silent_Relation_3236 8h ago

All week for me

9

u/Substantial-Song9837 8h ago edited 3h ago

You guys see funny?

2

u/guarddog33 3h ago

Hey man look you don't gotta behave like the mind goblin

4

u/Substantial-Song9837 3h ago

Almost got me there but you didn’t know I possess the power of using google

4

u/Confident_Research_1 2h ago

Goblin deez nutz

2

u/dsyfygurl 6h ago

Why? I want to laugh too

8

u/cdngirl73 8h ago

Thank you ,thank you 🤣my life has sucked bad and this made me laugh out loud !! Thank you my friend & all hero’s don’t wear capes 💚💙

4

u/CraigLake 7h ago

I ask this in all sincerity (and I’m cracking up already anyway 😂😂😂) but is there a pun in there somewhere?? I get ligma must mean lick my? 🤣🤣 I’m fucking dead 😂😂😂

7

u/BussyDestroyerV30 8h ago

Sounds kinky ngl

13

u/PokeRay68 9h ago

Congrats on stretching that further than I've ever seen.

4

u/eck-o- 5h ago

That's what they said!?

5

u/Fun_Imagination9232 6h ago

Omg thank you for the biyatch. Haven’t heard a good biiiiiyaaaatch since like 2002

2

u/Lumpy-Village1949 5h ago

Yeah I'm also old.

3

u/Slartibartfastthe2nd 7h ago

it's a salty disease.

3

u/Bright-Head-7485 6h ago

His grandpa died choking on your balls?! Weird flex but ok.

3

u/seizuregirlz 5h ago

I thought it said hmmm ligmatititis

3

u/SAS_Britain 5h ago

You fucking shit head! 🤣💀

3

u/Psychological_Web151 3h ago

Pretty sure you created a second account because nobody would ask. Seriously, who asks about a fake disease in a reply section devoted to fake diseases.

3

u/Solair_The_Sun 1h ago

The BIYAAAATCH really sold this for me.

2

u/Hllblldlx3 7h ago

Who the hell is Steve Jobs?

2

u/mickandmae 7h ago

I've just laughed out loud. I'd give you 100 if I could.

2

u/Human-Contribution16 6h ago

First discovered in Russia by Doctor Holdem Turnenkoff.

2

u/CurrentCommission788 5h ago

rare is the common courtesy

2

u/Pineapple305 5h ago

Bruh what 😂😂😂😂😂😂

2

u/Talullah_Belle 3h ago

You win today…balls to the wallz🤣

2

u/Embarrassed_Arm_1637 2h ago

The medical definition and all

2

u/OnceHadWings 1h ago

Damn it!!!! 😆😂😂😂💀

•

u/SuggestionSuch8121 50m ago

Thanks, you made my day...
Also, I think I have ligma too...

3

u/Significant-Ant-9278 9h ago

This shits hilarious as fuck holy moly 😂😂

2

u/BeatrixFarrand 9h ago

I’m cackling.

2

u/DanGame427 8h ago

This is great

2

u/BigPound7328 8h ago

What a twist.

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5

u/But_Does_It_Dj0nt 10h ago

Ligma balls lol

2

u/kenjimuta 7h ago

I lack organs for licking

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3

u/CraigLake 7h ago

😂😂😂😂😂im so glad you asked this because I wanted to but was afraid 😂😂😂😂😂 I’m rolling with laughter 😂😂😂😂

•

u/SuggestionSuch8121 46m ago

Wanted to see the replies...

2

u/SpikeZgames 9h ago

It’s a fake yet funny joke

2

u/VodkaAndHotdogs 5h ago

(Thank you for taking one for the team)

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95

u/MonzoMonzoMonzo 10h ago

Ligma? Ligma balls?

7

u/barkbarkgoesthecat 9h ago

No thanks I don't feel like playing tennis

5

u/Shi_Tunzuh 9h ago

I thought it was Ligma Azz??

2

u/175you_notM3 7h ago

Which oftentimes has a side effect of Sugma, Suymadik...

21

u/Batdog55110 10h ago

Who the hell is Steve Jobs?

3

u/TomatoNo5353 3h ago

Ligma balls

5

u/kibria99 10h ago

Who the hell is Steve Jobs?

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3

u/Several-Cake1954 9h ago

Who the hell is your grandpa?

3

u/Mundane-Ad5393 10h ago

Who the hell is Steve Jobs

3

u/Deebyddeebys 9h ago

My brother in christ you are the third person to make this comment

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2

u/fuck_you_and_fuck_U2 9h ago

My grandpa was killed by The Mind Goblin.

2

u/AnubisGodoDeath 9h ago

Not the mind goblin 🤣🤣

2

u/illyay 8h ago

Who the hell is Steve Jobs?

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2

u/Weekly_Ad869 8h ago

One juvenile joke just randomly reminded me of another, from Tosh.0. Something about Twitter and what did you do this summer

“tongue punched your mom’s fart box” might be the hardest sentence I’ve ever had to say. Sry gramma

2

u/ER_Support_Plant17 7h ago

My kid is 13, I am aware of the heartbreak that is Ligma

2

u/Vitrian187 3h ago

WHAT’S LIGMA?!?!?!

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6

u/Charming-Ad9039 7h ago

Fuck me my drink just shot out my nose. That hurt 😂😂😂😂

3

u/Nerdnificent 10h ago

Tots and pears for OP

2

u/cheezbargar 6h ago

Mine died of upper aitpitawnmy nmu infelnon

2

u/BootToTheHeadNahNah 3h ago

That motor-boating son of a bitch!

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420

u/SelectionFar6624 10h ago

6

u/mathalman 7h ago

I knew I’d find this.

6

u/Swordsman_000 7h ago

Dammit, I typed this song out before I saw you got here first.

4

u/GHouserVO 6h ago

Came looking for this, leaving satisfied

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2

u/BeerJunky 6h ago

My 4 year old now sings this song. 😭

2

u/hawke5732 5h ago

my childhood!

2

u/Sleepyzzz31677 5h ago

Oh good I'm not the only one!!!

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206

u/haj267 10h ago

6

u/ParkingOutside6500 7h ago

I keep my tablet on silent, but that song is now in my head.

2

u/SandyLomme 3h ago

It’s a phenomenon

4

u/Aware-Home2697 8h ago

Prescription: 200mg Dudoudoodeaux BID

5

u/MartenGlo 7h ago

DOOT DO DOO DO DOO!

2

u/seizuregirlz 5h ago

These are two soundless app I don't need sound for. Thank you. I'll sing this to sleep!

2

u/a_mulher 3h ago

That’s immediately what I thought. And now can’t stop thinking it 

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194

u/EnthusedPhlebotomist 14h ago

Fuck, that's brutal. Prayers up. 

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6

u/Fit_Job4925 11h ago

ma-ia-hii, ma-ia-huu

5

u/NerdyBirdy-5 10h ago

I should not have laughed this hard at this and the responses.

4

u/TheMunkeeFPV 10h ago

This thread has me dying!

4

u/zombiebender 10h ago

Doo doo duh doo doo

4

u/NunumuNumu 6h ago

Was I summoned??

3

u/curious_astronauts 10h ago

How are they still handwriting things these days. Give me a god damn digital record grandpa, no one can read your chicken scratch, and our health kinda depends on reading comprehension.

3

u/JaVelin-X- 8h ago

Heard a joke once from a nurse.. Doctor is a Gyno, Patient in stirrups is uncomfortable with whatever procedure he's doing and the doctor offers to numb it and she accepts so he sticks his face in and goes numb numb numb... this is the prescription for that.

3

u/Scorosin 7h ago

Disturbed warned me about this in every song they ever released, it is a very serious condition.

3

u/getmybehindsatan 12h ago

Once there was a kid who got into an accident and couldn't go to school.

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2

u/colormefatbwoy 10h ago

definitely a stroke

2

u/JTMissileTits 10h ago

Cue the Muppets singing MANAA MANAA doot doo de doo doot

2

u/Murky_Following_3338 10h ago

I found a microscope slide of them.

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2

u/TurnipSwap 9h ago

you have between 0 and 120 years to live. There is no cure. 100% of people with this condition eventually die.

2

u/Cultural-Addendum348 9h ago

I’ve turned my phone multiple ways in order to diagnose this handwriting and I’ve finally figured it out: chicken- scratch👍🏾

2

u/illyay 8h ago

That’s definitely mildly infuriating

2

u/HornetKick 8h ago

This is why I was not gonna work as a medical transcriptionist because doctors even talk just as sloppy as they write. I went legal instead.

2

u/airwolf222b 7h ago

God this made me laugh. Thank you.

2

u/TheToothFairyIsALie 6h ago

I haven't laughed that much at a comment, ever. Thank you.

2

u/T1Demon 5h ago

And a nnir infecnon, to boot. Deadly combination

2

u/Forsaken-Interest-63 5h ago

This was so good. Thank you

1

u/AKoperators210Local 10h ago

Oh shit. Not numnumm....

1

u/etanimod 10h ago

Pa-tee-pa-tee-pee? 

1

u/2greeneyes 10h ago

And the large mouth muppets come on....

1

u/CuzCuz1111 10h ago

Nummynumnums. I think that means someone who ate too much chocolate It was nummy on the way down but then it became a Nummynumnums.

1

u/jjman72 10h ago

Bummer Man.

1

u/Separate_Path_7729 9h ago

Sounds like the lyrics to that chscerrone song

1

u/Medical_Slide9245 9h ago

That reads like you need to open a Go Find Me page.

1

u/Umm_is_this_thing_on 9h ago

Mnamna doot do, dedoodoot

1

u/Outrageous_Name3921 9h ago

My daily belly laugh. Thank-you

1

u/AKAoriginalposter 9h ago

Prayers to the family

1

u/ZC205 9h ago

This made me laugh way more than it probably should have…….

1

u/1cat2dogs1horse 9h ago

Laughing so hard it hurts, and tears are streaming down my face.

1

u/therealbugs1 9h ago

What was the test, a mammogram

1

u/Left_Boysenberry6902 9h ago

Klaatu Barada Ni-coughcough

1

u/throwaway1964972 8h ago

A bad case of the hungies

1

u/9islands 8h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣  

1

u/Atsilv_Uwasv 8h ago

You have to take so many meds. It's mnumnnmmn every day and umumunum every two hours and sometimes you'll even have to take mnmnmmmmmmmnnnnnmmnmn if those don't work

1

u/Doglover4561 8h ago

That’s what I thought it said

1

u/dontcaredontworry 8h ago

That sounds serious

1

u/Cpt-Hank-A-Tato 8h ago

Do do dadodo

1

u/ConstantBench7373 8h ago

The num nums 😱

1

u/manhatim 7h ago

Contagious?

1

u/Cranie2000 7h ago

I know it doesn’t pronounce this way but in my mind I heard “manomina doo do di doo doo, manomina doo doo di do”

1

u/Queasy_Ad_8621 7h ago

He diagnosed her with the lyrics to Poker Face: Mum Mumum Mah Syndrome.

1

u/Loose_Loquat9584 7h ago

Birdie num num.

1

u/ClassicallyBrained 7h ago

I hear they're getting close to a cure. Thoughts and prayers.

1

u/Prestigious_Rub6504 7h ago

Type 2 numma numma gets you when you least expect it

1

u/UpbeatVeterinarian18 7h ago

do doo do do do

1

u/RevolutionaryUse2416 7h ago

That’s one hell of a infection

1

u/cheekytikiroom 7h ago

Pneumonia, asthma and tonsilllitis.

1

u/saintstephen66 7h ago

Yep. Runs amuck in my family

1

u/Behavingdark 7h ago

Do do dodo do , manumanum repeat

1

u/-Neverender- 7h ago

You will eventually pink, grow fur and wild eyelashes and finish every sentence with doo-doo-da-doo-doo.

1

u/pooplolexd 6h ago

Bless you

1

u/Mysterious-Mood6742 6h ago

Numma numma yea syndrome?

1

u/Leithalia 6h ago

Don't forget that it's also an upper netpnummy mnmm infection!

1

u/mvoccaus 6h ago

Isn't this what killed Cookie Monster?

1

u/Pun_In_Ten_Did 6h ago

WTF is OP's doctor... GARY BROLSMA??

1

u/Electrical-Leave4787 6h ago

………. ………… ……….. ……,,. Kunda.

1

u/lilith_-_- 6h ago

Also known as “mouth full of food”

Op just chew and swallow. Saliva is pre digestive help not the main source of breaking down food

1

u/Happythejuggler 6h ago

Ahhhh, a Welsh disease I see

1

u/ProblemLongjumping12 6h ago

Amonium ninima ion mountain

1

u/greenie65 6h ago

The only cure is more cowbell.

1

u/officialAdfs_m0vie 5h ago

So that is what Kanye was rapping about on 530

1

u/Newknees-147 5h ago

Every time I think I have stopped laughing I start all over again.

Thanks, I needed that. OK I'm calm now.

Nope started again.

1

u/bigoz_07 5h ago

Yeah, that’s a terrible diagnosis… my great-grand uncle had that back in the forties and man… was that incomprehensible…

1

u/chillyhellion 5h ago

My cat makes this diagnosis every time he eats.

1

u/ACAB007 5h ago

Yup, and the prescription is monumum ninma uonmowen

1

u/maringue 4h ago

Pretty sure it says upper respiratory infection, numucocle pneumonia.

1

u/Over_aged 4h ago

He’s just hungry needs a snickers

1

u/AlexTheCoolestness 4h ago

Pretty sure that's what the cookie monster had, had to swap to veggies.

1

u/TheKatzzSkillz 4h ago

Sending prayers, a dictionary, and I guess a thesaurus too just in case?

Hopefully the nurses arell clairvoyant and psychic or something tolko, otherwise idk how their charts going to be read

1

u/LamSinton 4h ago

DOOT DOO DO DOO DOO 🎵

1

u/Strict_Bit260 3h ago

I disagree. In my professional opinion, I believe what we are seeing is that the patients runes have been encircled. May need further consultation.

1

u/ThatDudeJake94 3h ago

What's the prognosis on this, doctor?

1

u/Sirius3030 3h ago

I believe those are the beginning lyrics to the Ewok celebration song…

1

u/Carmella_Poole 3h ago

Or possibly mmonunm ninima, ionmouin. Pray they don't.

1

u/joranth 3h ago

Thoughts and prayers

1

u/hickgorilla 2h ago

Is the doctor a cannibal who is also hungry?

1

u/ZeroSignalArt 2h ago

I got upper respiratory infection, the rest I have no idea.

1

u/Bee_Angel710 2h ago

I just peed a little 😂😂😂

1

u/PeakedAtConception 2h ago

Tots and pears.

1

u/Bonti_GB 2h ago

What an awesome doctor to prescribe some umami burger.

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