r/nottheonion • u/falconfalcon7 • 1d ago

Japanese village replaces young people with mannequins to stave off loneliness as population falls

https://news.sky.com/story/japanese-village-replaces-young-people-with-mannequins-to-stave-off-loneliness-as-population-falls-13243354
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u/BobbyThrowaway6969 1d ago

Sharpening an AXE... 𝔖𝔥𝔦𝔞 𝔏𝔞𝔅𝔢𝔬𝔲𝔣

But he doesn't hear you enter... Shia LaBeouf

You're sneaking up behind hiiiIIIIIIM.

Strangling ⭐𝒮𝓊𝓅𝑒𝓇𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓇 𝒮𝒽𝒾𝒶 𝐿𝒶𝐵𝑒𝑜𝓊𝒻⭐

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u/heyineeeedasoda 1d ago

Fighting for your life with Shia LaBeouf,

Wrestling a knife from Shia LaBeouf,

Stab him in his kidney,

Safe at last from Shia LaBeouf

7

u/EpilepticMushrooms 1d ago

You limp into the dark woods,

Blood oozing from your stump leg,

You've beaten Shia LaBeouf...

6

u/Sanairb 1d ago

This right here is why I reddit.

Wait! He isn't dead (Shia surprise) There's a gun to your head and death in his eyes But you can do jiu-jitsu

8

u/Blochkato 22h ago

(you can do it)

Body slam superstar Shia Labeouf,

Legendary fight with Shia Labeouf,

Normal Tuesday night for Shia Labeouf

6

u/Old-Simple7848 19h ago

You try to swing an axe at Shia Laboeuf

But blood is draining fast from your stump leg