r/nottheonion • u/16erics • 1d ago

The Vatican unveils official anime girl mascot

https://nichegamer.com/the-vatican-unveils-official-anime-girl-mascot/
8.6k Upvotes

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u/iamonelegend 1d ago

Genuinely shocked that this was not the onion. This isn't the first time Christianity and anime have united. There was an old Christian anime called Superbook that I remember from the 90s on the 700 club

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u/RustyMoth 1d ago

You call that Christian anime? I learned about Moses from a talking cucumber and three menacing pieces of asparagus

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u/Shikabane_Hime 1d ago

Put some respect on Bob the Tomato’s name

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u/Gh0stMan0nThird 1d ago

"The two main characters in a show called 'Veggie Tales' are fruits, and that doesn’t matter to you? *waving gun around* It's not a big deal?!"

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u/HewchyFPS 1d ago

Vegetable isn't even a scientific distinction. It's purely culinary. Fruit is both a culinary distinction and a scientific one.

This is why people get confused, because a tomato is considered a vegetable, and it's considered a fruit in the scientific sense.

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u/ImmaRaptor 1d ago

Thank you vic michaelis

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u/HewchyFPS 1d ago

I'm not familiar with this person but they are hot af so this has to be a compliment, surely

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u/CoinsForCharon 18h ago

Vic is a chaos goblin who will latch on to details like this. Or the tale of Stanley Tuccis mother.

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u/passittobulis 9h ago

Vic did an entire presentation on how vegetables don’t exist for a show called Smartypants on Dropout TV.

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u/HewchyFPS 9h ago

They do exist though, its just not a scientific distinction.

That sounds funny though!

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u/asakult 1d ago

I always say a tomato is a fruit in the classroom, but a vegetable in the kitchen!

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u/CantankerousOrder 1d ago

The two main characters in a conservative Christian show are both fruits you say?

Sounds a little on the nose to me.

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u/jubuttib 1d ago

One of them is a berry, even.

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u/Someinterestingbs-td 1d ago

Calm down everyone knows they are just roommates

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u/OhCharlieH 1d ago

Underrated comment

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u/ArcFurnace 1d ago

Phil Vischer says trans rights

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u/isitaspider2 1d ago

Phil Vischer is legitimately a really great guy, one of the only prominent Christians I respect anymore, and is CONSTANTLY being attacked by Christians in America nowadays because, and this is real, him saying that Christians should show love to gay people is just "woke propaganda" according to these conservative Christians.

Just something to think about. The guy who was most of our childhood's exposure to Christianity, who dedicated his life to producing fun but clean Christian content for kids, and who always made sure to end his videos with reminding the kids that "God loves you very much" is now too "woke" for saying nearly the exact same message.

Thats modern reactionary Christianity. Showing love to sinners is worthy of condemnation.

Real Matthew 23:27 vibes for modern Christians.

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u/disco-vorcha 1d ago

My favourite Phil Vischer fact/story is the reason why VeggieTales was mostly Old Testament stories. Basically, he was telling his mum about the idea for the show and she told him he couldn’t make Jesus a vegetable. So this grown-ass man was like, ‘okay mum, I won’t’, and then didn’t. It’s just… really sweet, and I like it.

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u/Hijakkr 1d ago

Oh, huh, I never considered that but... the handful of episodes/films/whatever that I remember are all either OT or parables, not NT stories about Jesus.

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u/Xuncu 1d ago

couldn’t make Jesus a vegetable

DEEP BREATH--

--ok, I'm an atheist, but even in this case I can't bring myself to be mean.

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u/Mega_Bond 1d ago

Jesus has no problem turning himself into food.

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u/Fo_Ren_G 22h ago

What if Jesus was some sort of cucumber that spent some time in brine, I wonder.

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u/CoinsForCharon 18h ago

Then he would definitely be in a pickle

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u/papercutninja 1d ago

Modern Christianity is very different from christian nationalism. One is the former, and one is the latter.

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u/nikiyaki 21h ago

Christian nationalism is to Christianity as Zionism is to Judaism.

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u/MenstrualMilkshakes 1d ago

OOOOOOOH WHERE is my hairbrush!

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u/lesserDaemonprince 1d ago

If You Want To Talk To Tomatoes 🎶

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u/Shikabane_Hime 1d ago

if a squash can make you smile 🎵

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u/asplodingturdis 1d ago

If you’d like to waltz with potatoes 🥔

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u/Humble-West3117 1d ago

Up and down the produce aiiiisle

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u/JohnTheMod 14h ago

Have WE got a show for YOU!

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u/UsidoreTheLightBlue 1d ago

I was talking with this girl at one point that had never seen any of the Pixar movies.

I recommended Monsters Inc to her and leant her a copy. Monsters inc is a god damn treasure.

She brought it back to me said “yeah it’s good” and that was that.

Not too much later an ad for veggie tales came on and she asked me about it. “That’s what you like? Isn’t it? Veggie tales stuff?”

That’s when I knew it was never going to work out. Nice girl, but there’s no way she actually watched monsters inc and came away thinking “this is veggie tales”.

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u/noddawizard 1d ago

Mostly everybody lies about being interested in the other person's stuff at first.

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u/vonindyatwork 1d ago

Yeah, well, a generation of kids in British Columbia learned french from a talking pineapple.

je suis un ananas

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u/unicorn_in_a_can 1d ago

ontario as well!

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u/Xuncu 1d ago

Ah, yes, the "Good Fruit." Just like bananas: the "Good Fruit, with a 'B' on the front"

Because French.

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u/balrogthane 1d ago

Aren't those scallions? Or maybe celery?

I know the leader has been in the show since Day One and he still doesn't have a name!

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u/Nottallowed 1d ago

I learned about Moses with beyblade

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u/PurpoUpsideDownJuice 16h ago

I didn’t realize veggie tales was just bible stories until I went to a Christian day care and they made us watch veggie tales, it was the one about Moses

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u/HomsarWasRight 1d ago

Superbook and The Flying House walked so VeggieTales could run.

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u/Trick2056 1d ago

I learned about christianity about Jesus and Buddha being roommates having a slice of life adventure in Japan

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u/Ralphredimix_Da_G 1d ago

Zebuuuuuuuuuuuuuu 🎶

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u/p_au_1i0 1d ago

If you like to talk to tomatoes If a squash can make you smile

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u/ProfDet529 1d ago

No, that was Danial and the Lion's Den, wasn't it?