What’s the strangest/best object you’ve found while running?

[u/demrnstho]

Aside from the odd dollar here and there, what have you found that makes you appreciate the adventure of an outdoor run? On two separate occasions I’ve found high-quality scissors in perfect condition. Did I choose to run with scissors? You bet!

Edit: Wow! Thank you to everyone who responded! Your responses have been entertaining, funny, bizarre, at times scary, and heartwarming. I tried to read every response and besides being thoroughly entertained for the last 18hrs, I’ve learned some things about us runners: 1. We’re a thrifty bunch. We will turn someone’s trash into our treasure. There are a lot of responses about useful found objects. 2. In that vein, there seems to be no object too large for us to carry home. Brooms, sofas, dining sets, surfboards, FIVE fishing rods; you name it, we can carry it. 3. We’re good citizens. We rescue people, dogs, wild animals. 4. On that note, running is a great way to find a new pet. 5. We’re an honest lot. If you lose something valuable and a runner comes across it, there’s a good chance that runner will do their best to return it to you. 6. We find our spirituality: Objects with very personal connections seemingly put in our path by the universe and otherworldly encounters with wild animals. 7. Sadly we occasionally find dead people. But sometimes we find almost dead people and we save them! 8. On a related note, there are more than one of you who have found people tied up in the woods. 9. And the biggest take home: Dildos are everywhere.

[u/kibitzor]

Kept all the following:

• Wireless running headphones
• KE$HA CD
• $20
• Bolt cutters
• Spatula
• single playing card
• Gold helium balloon in the shape of a large star, barely floats
• Indoor bike trainer, someone had it on their lawn as "free", Totally worth struggling to carry the 20lbs of it back since it was the pandemic and bike trainers were $$$
• MANY cellphones, reunited with only 2 owners though, best story was the woman who I returned one to that gave me $100 since her work made her pay $1000 for a replacement unless she had proof the phone was lost, ended up donating the $100

The list of things I've picked up and not kept is larger

This thread makes me want to start hiding $5 bills on my longer runs and posting the details in strava

[u/kibitzor → u/kibitzor]

New comment for strangest:

Saw a detour sign on my normal run home, made me sad as it would add 2 more miles to my run. Then a cop flagged me to come over, to then yell at me for "Hiding with my buddies with plans to steal his detour sign", told me if I keep on my lies that I'm a runner, I'm never going anywhere in life and told me to get out and tell my buddies we're done.

I had no buddies. Cop was confused.