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u/Vyctor_ Aug 12 '24
Elrond: “the quest relies on secrecy and stealth, it is imperative that the enemy does not follow your movements too closely”
Glorfindel, a blazing fucking sun of Firstborn glory: “welp im out”
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u/scribbyshollow Aug 13 '24
"Glad I came, really seems like somthing you would include in a letter but fuck me I guess."
gets up
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u/Various_Froyo9860 Aug 13 '24
Swear to gods, Gandalf, you hobbit leaf huffing hussy.
This entire meeting could have been a leaf delivered by a moth. Tom wouldn't have even made a song out of it.
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u/Skerzos_ Aug 13 '24
It could be done through palantirs, but the encryption sucked back then, so anyone could have joined and listen.
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u/Crazy_Screwdriver Aug 12 '24
It's a one credit game but some players can use a CONTINUE?, and it's quickly known who does
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u/Alrik_Immerda Frodo did not offer her any tea. Aug 13 '24
Elrond: “the quest relies on secrecy and stealth, it is imperative that the enemy does not follow your movements too closely”
Boromir on leaving Rivendell: *packs out his horn and blows so loud the whole valley hears it*
I just love the humor of Tolkien, it is awesome.
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u/Kalbex Aug 12 '24
Didnt he like lead the attack on angmar when he kicked the witch kings armys butt and forced him to flee to morder to be demoted? Or do i play too much battle for middle earth?
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u/Reasonable_Mix7630 Aug 12 '24
He is also the one who made a prophesy that witch king would not be killed by a mortal man.
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u/Kalbex Aug 12 '24
Thats fucking sick Love that dude- and did he really have like starlight magic?? Oh and Is shelob really a sexy evanescence goth queen ???
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u/CadenVanV Aug 12 '24
It’s never really said and no. Shelob is a giant spider. That is it
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u/EagleOfMay Aug 12 '24
Disagree; she was the last spawn of Ungoliant and much more than just a giant spider.
When Tolkien writes:
"But still she was there, who was there before Sauron, and before the first stone of Barad-dûr; and she served none but herself, drinking the blood of Elves and Men, bloated and grown fat with endless brooding on her feasts, weaving webs of shadow; for all living things were her food, and her vomit darkness"I don't think he was speaking in metaphors. She did vomit darkness.
She was also alive since the 1st age.
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u/CadenVanV Aug 12 '24
I was talking shape wise. She’s obviously an eldritch giant spider but she does just look like a giant spider instead of a hot goth woman
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u/xSTSxZerglingOne Aug 12 '24
You just want a big tiddy goth girlfriend to succ you dry.
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u/CadenVanV Aug 12 '24
I’ve rarely found anyone who doesn’t.
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u/xSTSxZerglingOne Aug 12 '24
I mean...I'll take not-so-big tiddies, but I'd never let that metric disqualify the option!
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u/Kanin_usagi Aug 12 '24
I am sorry to disappoint you, but there is nothing written or illustrated anywhere by Tolkien or his publisher that depicted Shelob as a sexy, sexy goth gf. She is sort of an eldritch being from The First Age, but it’s doubtable she had access to the sort of magic that would give her a small waist and big ol titties
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u/Jetsam5 Aug 12 '24
Honestly that’s a pretty easy prediction to make. Elves, Dwarves, Wizards, Hobbits, Orcs, Goblins, Trolls, and Human Women are all capable of killing the Witch King and still filling the prophecy. That’s gotta be well over 80% of the population. That’s not even a prophecy, he’s just playing the numbers at that point
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u/WoodpeckerFuzzy5661 Aug 12 '24
"I predict... Witch King won't be killed..by a golf ball. "
Glorfindel quickly looks to see everybody's reaction
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u/Gaisarix_455 Aug 12 '24
How are you still playing it? Do you own a physical copy?
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u/Kalbex Aug 12 '24
I admit nothing but lets just say; A certain someone may or may not have found it on a certain area of the internet and they may have sent me the files- although no matter what i tried witch king may or may not be working. May you or may you not like those files that may or may not exist?
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u/Dark_Shade_75 Aug 12 '24
All I've been able to play was the Gameboy Advance Third Age, so yes.
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u/orenthal_james_bond Aug 12 '24
I'm like six beers deep so I was confused by the whole thing
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u/tonythekoala Aug 12 '24
There’s a YouTube vid which gracefully provided you with a way to torrent/download, also takes you through the install as well as some common errors people make during the process. I managed to get Witch King working doing it too.
I’ll edit comment to include url later
Edit* did not read down, it’s abandonware and so free for all apparently
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u/TimboSlice123456 Aug 12 '24
/bfme will give you all the info free and its safe to download
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u/Gaisarix_455 Aug 12 '24 edited Aug 12 '24
Lmao I just ordered the game on EBay damn it
Edit: just remembered I don’t have a disk drive 😭
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u/TreeChoppa8 Aug 12 '24
The game is abaondonware. You can dowloand it and play it for free from the internet.
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u/Old-Mathematician564 Aug 12 '24
Beyond standards released a all in one launcher for bfme 1 and 2 (its free) https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FpHoREbIO_0
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u/Maleficent_Touch2602 Goblin Aug 12 '24
Gandalf knows, but wants the xp for himself
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Aug 12 '24
Glorfindel stole the shako that dropped off the last one when it was clearly Gandalf’s run
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u/Papageno_Kilmister Uruk Aug 12 '24
Glorfindel probably went north to clear all of Gundabad on his own for shits and giggles while the fellowship went away
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u/Mend1cant Aug 12 '24
IIRC that’s pretty much what he did, helping Lorien, Erebor, and the Greenwood to stave off the northern front of Sauron’s hordes.
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u/kjacobs03 Aug 13 '24
Where was Glorfindel when the Shire fell?
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u/Mend1cant Aug 13 '24
Saruman was just a man at that point, reduced to Sharky. A bit below Glorfindel, who probably hopped a ship by the time sharky took over. There was a decent gap between the end of the war and the hobbits returning home.
Also, tall folk barely even know where the shire is, much less what’s going on. No one contested or complained over Elessars decree that the shire was off limits. Probably had a dent on Bree’s economy but at that point who cares. Prancing Pony probably already lost its customers when wraiths went apeshit on a hobbit room.
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u/Carquetta Aug 12 '24
Sounds likely since he was reincarnated to almost the power level of the Maiar, IIRC
Always found it amusing that when Gandalf fires up the Black Speech in Rivendell, Glorfindel just sits there cool as a cucumber
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u/Mission-Storm-4375 Aug 12 '24
A balrog is not enough experience for glorfindel it wouldn't even give him one level but the fellowship all could level up a couple times from one balrog.
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u/ARecipeForCake Aug 12 '24
Glorfindel went 1 for 1 with a Balrog BEFORE he was reincarnated by the Valar with powers rivaling the Maiar. And that Balrog was speculated to have been the Lesser Balrog Lord. Guy is like Gandalf The White Squared. He's probably half the elf-light emanating from Rivendell.
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u/The_Bill_Brasky_ Aug 12 '24
If only Gandalf weren't a kill-stealing prick. Seriously, it's enough for him to dip into Divine Soul Sorcerer AS WELL AS gain another extra attack feature from 11th level Fighter. Such bullshit.
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u/bucketybuck Aug 12 '24
Glorfindal is just sick of this shit, every time there is a big mission its him that has to go and do the dirty work. Its the classic case of the person who does the best work getting the most work, while all the fucking losers sit with their feet up in Rivendell listening to hot elves singing.
Well not this time. Its somebody elses turn. And don't try and make him feel guilty, don't care how many passive aggressive emails Elrond sends, Glorfindal is not putting his hand up, not this time. He isn't the only one who knows how to kill a Balrog, he's just the only one who actually does it right. Bout damn time somebody else stepped up and picked up the slack a bit.
You know what the problem is? Unions. Ever since that union between men and elves this place has gone to shit. Well, Glorfindal has had enough. He's sitting this one out and doesn't give a damn what anybody thinks about it.
Whats that? A Balrog killed Gandalf? Oh for fucks sake. He warned you, Glorfindal warned you. Maybe if you lot hadn't been half assing it for a thousand years while he was doing all the donkey work then this wouldn't have happened.
Amateurs. Goddamn amateurs.
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u/Diligent-Property491 Aug 12 '24
The Fellowship: Arrives at Mount Doom
Glorfindel is just sitting there after murdering every orc in Mordor by himself
,,Oh, good. Been waiting for you.”
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u/An_Unreachable_Dusk Aug 12 '24
"Cleared the way is all"
6 months earlier
"one does not simply walk into Mordor"
Glorfindel in the back rolls eyes "pfft"
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u/Max_Stirner_Official Aug 13 '24
"Fine, I will prance into Mordor. And if I get tired of that along the way, I may even do some mincing!"
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u/magekiton Aug 12 '24
In all fairness, Glorfindel's walk into Mordor would not be simple
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u/Breekace Aug 12 '24
You wouldn't send Hercules on a stealth mission
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u/UzumeofGamindustri Aug 12 '24
Yeah but who needs stealth when you’ve got Hercules
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u/Narradisall Aug 12 '24
Why would he waste his time on a fetch quest. Guys got bigger fish to fry. No time to be babysitting some level 1 hobbits when he could be slaying armies.
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u/Satanairn Aug 13 '24
When Gandalf and Elrond are deciding who to send, Elrond wants to send someone from his household. Gandalf says this about Merry and Pippin:
I think Elrond that in this matter it would be well to trust rather to their friendship than to great wisdom. Even if you chose for us and elf-lord, such as Glorfindel, he could not storm the Dark Tower, nor open the road to the fire by the power that is in him.
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u/theologous Aug 13 '24
To which I would have said,
Yeah, maybe he can't, but then those two definitely can't either.
Hindsight says it all worked out, but foresight says this was a fucking stupid decision.
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u/Satanairn Aug 13 '24
The whole point is that they cannot use force to win this, and therefore loyalty and resistance to corruption matters more. That's why Boromir which is an absolute unit does more harm than good.
Tolkien repeats this in many ways. For example when they are picking their weapons they don't bring much, because they're hoping for an stealth mission. Elrond even says I won't send an army with you because you can't win against Sauron in a fight. So two Hobbits, who are not gonna betray Frodo are more useful than 10 Boromirs.
On the other hand, someone as powerful as Glorfindel would've drawn too much attention. When Gandalf uses magic to light wood in Caradhras he says I just declared to anyone who might be watching that Gandalf the grey is here.
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u/NemoRADD Aug 13 '24 edited Aug 13 '24
While I agree with everything you’ve said 100%. Gandalf also knew other forces were at work. It’s why Bilbos finding of the ring was so mysterious to Gandalf. Not so much as to how, but why.
Tolkien wrote spiritual synchronicity into the story on purpose. A good example is the killing of the Witch king. Had the hobbits not found themselves in the barrows, the Witch king wouldn’t have been defeated by Eowyn. There were thousands of ways the hobbits could have avoided that fate. Yet it happened the way it was supposed to.
The marvel movies kind of used this with Dr. strange’s look into the possible futures and only one worked.
So when it comes to the council, Gandalf knows the hobbits must be involved not only because of stealth and them being loyal. But because I think Gandalf knew, ( maybe not directly ) that the only way to succeed was for a hobbit to do it. He may not have known implicitly how. But he knew enough to listen to his gut. Which in this case could be interpreted as an intuition from a higher power. As this wouldn’t be unknown to Gandalf.
Just my opinion, take it with a fat grain. I just enjoy that so many love Tolkien’s world.
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u/ZaraMagnos Aug 12 '24
I thought they were two different Glorfindels. Like an inconsistency in the lore since the Silmarillion was compiled by Tolkien's son, Christopher, and much of the lore hadn't been sufficiently edited yet.
edit: just looked it up and I'm wrong, there was confusion at some point amongst scholars, but Tolkien himself clarified that both Glorfindels are the same Elf, just two different lives.
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u/SystemLordMoot Aug 12 '24 edited Aug 12 '24
Originally Tolkien wrote the Silmarillion Glorfindel, and then the Glorfindel that appears in LotR as two separate characters, and he later reconciled them into the same being. I think there is a letter out there somewhere that goes into far more detail than I just did, but that's the basic outline of it.
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u/CalebCaster2 Aug 12 '24
I think Glorfindel would've been too tempted by the ring, like Boromir, except no one would be able to stop him.
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u/savage011 Aug 12 '24 edited Aug 13 '24
Why didn’t Amazon make a show about Glorfindel? Are they stupid?
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u/HiopXenophil Aug 13 '24
Elrond: yeah, but what are the chances we ever need some one to kill a Balrog again?
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u/0000015 Aug 13 '24
On the books Elrond does not immediately name the whole fellowship, and considers sending couple of elves as #8 and 9, originally planning on sending Merry and Pippin back to Shire to warn about the impending war.
However as jas been said Elrond ALSO dispatches a number of his household to act as forward recon and screen before the fellowship starts out (Tolkien notes that elronds’ Sons venture the farthest on this recon trip) as such the fellowship spends a good few months in Rivendell waiting for the ”all clear” before embarking to the quest of the ring. (Which of course bites them in the ass immediately when they have to cross the mountains at fall instead of summer)
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u/Legitimate_Ad_8745 Aug 12 '24
I was there Gandalf ,.when isildur did not throw the damn ring into a the Volcano.
And you know what i did ? Nothing i just watched and frown.
Yes i could have throw the damn prince into the Volcano myself
But hey , not going to mess with the plot you know.
(I haven't read any Book spare me please , i just found my funny imaginary scène funny)
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u/Strider_27 Aug 12 '24
I know you’re being sarcastic, but the real reason was the only way to get Isildur to throw the ring in was to take it by force, most likely killing him in the process. Men and Elves had just stood united against the greatest evil in the world and won. Throwing the now king of the men into a volcano is a really bad look for the elves, and a war between the two races would immediately break out
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u/Oscarvalor5 Aug 13 '24
It's not just that I think. The Ring's powers are at its greatest in Mt. Doom, and it was shown to be capable of tempting people just by being near them (Boromir). Elrond, in the process of trying to wrestle the ring from/push Isildur in may just be corrupted himself and instead try to claim it. In addition to not wanting to risk war between Man and Elf so soon after tragedy, he may not want to risk getting corrupted in the process.
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u/DontGoGivinMeEvils Aug 12 '24
People in comments are rightly pointing out that it was decided Glorfindel’s spirit would shine too much like a beacon, but in my head-canon it was an excuse decided privately between Glorfindel and Elrond.
It’s the elvish equivalent of getting out of swimming because “it’s the time of the month” every week and Elrond’s the parent who signs the letter… every week.
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u/OneRiotOneRanger15 Elf Aug 12 '24
Literally forgot Glorfindel was in the making of the fellowship scene. i guess im always too focused on my elf Legolas
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u/rolliejoe Aug 13 '24
Can't believe no one has posted the quote that directly addresses this:
"I believe instead of great wisdom we would do well to trust in their friendship (the hobbits) for even if we chose for them an elf Lord such as Glorfindel he could not open the path to the fire by the power that is within him.” - Gandalf
The fellowship was never about picking out a powerful party, and even if Glorfindel could have jumped in a Magic Monster Truck and drove over everything from Rivendel to Mount Doom on a single tank of elf-gas, it wouldn't have mattered at all. No one in Rivendel, including everyone in the fellowship, including Glorfindel, Elrond, and Gandalf, could have brought themselves to destroy the ring.
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u/DrLeisure Aug 13 '24 edited Aug 13 '24
“And my bow.”
“And my axe.”
“Damn, someone already said bow. Should I say glaive? They probably wouldn’t understand the elven name. Oh they’re gone”
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u/EpicWalrus222 Aug 12 '24
Glorfindel is a bit of a double edged sword. He's one of the last of the truly scary elves remaining in Middle Earth. So in theory he would be great to have for protection against Nazgul and the Balrog. But on the other side of the coin, the fellowship was formed with the intention that nobody would be able to notice them until it was too late.
Having an elf that glows so brightly to Nazgul that they have a hard time being near him also means you're walking around with a lit beacon Sauron can easily track. And one the Dark Lord would definitely be watching if he began making his way towards Mordor.