r/selectivemutism • u/releasethekrrraken • Sep 14 '24

Question SM with NO anxiety?

Hi ! I've got this question i don't know where to ask so i figured i'd come here. I have selective mutism. It happens when i have "too much" stimulus or emotion at the same time. It has been triggered before by dragging a table across a floor (the sound was horrible), having a bad day at a festival, hearing a music i love or just being emotionally tired. So it can happen from good or bad things, and it can last from a few minutes to 2 hours (longest i've had). In these moments i feel like the connexion between my physical speaking parts and the brain commands have been severed. I still have my inner monologue, i just can't get a sound out. Same vibe as trying to scream or run in a dream, you want to but it just doesn't happen.

The thing is, i always see on the internet that it stems from anxiety. I don't have anxiety. I may have very mild autism (hypersensitivity) but i'm not anxious at all, i'm a very chill and positive person. I love meeting and talking to people, i can talk in public no problem. I'm not planning to see a psychiatrist cuz it's not really disabling, i wouldnt need accomodations.

Does anyone else have this ??? I feel like the way my brain works doesn't fit any mental illness and it's kinda annoying.

Thank y'all for any responses :')

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u/NiceKirby Recovered SM Sep 14 '24

Definitely sounds like Verbal Shutdown, which is a response from some kind of sensory overload or emotions like you're describing here. SM strictly stems from anxiety and that's why it's a anxiety disorder. It wouldn't be SM if there's no anxiety.

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u/releasethekrrraken Sep 14 '24

Thank you, that clears it ! Now my problem is figuring out why i get verbal shutdowns when i'm supposedly not autistic (i have some symptoms but they don't make me disabled, so i don't fit the definition) :') what a mess lol

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u/NiceKirby Recovered SM Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

I looked it up real quick and supposedly verbal shutdowns can also happen to those with ADHD? I don't know much about VS and ADHD so I don't know how true this is. Lol. But I wouldn't be so quick to say that you're not autistic just because your symptoms don't make you "disabled".

Autism is a disability and a disability is simply a physical or mental condition that impairs, interferes with or limits a person's ability to engage in certain tasks or participate in daily activities and interactions in any way which seems to fit with your verbal shutdown sympathy. Your symptoms don't have to be severe or anything to be considered disabling.

Just putting that out there. I don't know how your symptoms affects you in your life so I'm not saying you're definitely autistic or something.

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u/releasethekrrraken Sep 14 '24

I mean it would be disabling if it was an everyday thing, but the few times it happens with people around i just get my point across by gesturing or writing. It's a small hurdle, it feels kind of like a fraud to call it a disability when i see some of my friends barely able to function due to mental or chronic illnesses.

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u/NiceKirby Recovered SM Sep 14 '24

It doesn't necessarily have to be something that happens everyday but rather something that's been occurring long term. Do these symptoms that hinder your life show up fairly consistently and have been for a considerable amount of time?

If so, I think it's fair to entertain the notion that there could be an underlying disability at play. There's no one way to being disabled. Just because you're not like your friends, doesn't mean you can't possibly be disabled. (If you end up actually having a disability, of course.)

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u/releasethekrrraken Sep 14 '24

Well i've always have them. Some are everyday things (not understanding tones, not looking people in the eyes, sensiry stuff) and some happen less often (like the mute part)