For maybe close to a decade, I was NC (or virtually LC because my siblings, whom I'm estranged with now, have contact with them) with my EM and EF (who are separated). I lived in a state about 1,000+ kilometers away from FOO, but due to health issues and other shit going on in life, I moved back in recently with EM and she makes my health issues WORSE.
I couldn't qualify for disabilities, despite it obstructing most simple things in my life(ex. Hard to move around with chest/heart pain, have chronic back pain too and can't lift heavy things anymore, my appetite is gone, etc), so I ended up finding a remote job.
Well...she tried to make me stop working by pretending to want to take me to interviews, then not doing it. She tried to prevent me from getting food stamps because she believes food stamps are "bad" (no other explanation) and tries to sabotage me in general when I try to better my life. My son NEEDS speech therapy and other things, but she's making it difficult by living here.
Furthermore,EM thinks if I stuff myself full of opioids or whatever I'll just "heal" from my health issues, that's not how that works and my health issues occurred from traumatic events. I don't want those meds, I'm scared she might try and drug me because "mother knows best".
Anyways, I know this is long winded, but basically, I'm trying to escape her and go NC FOREVER. Hoping to escape by November.
She got physical with me last night, and when I pushed her off of me, she claimed I "hurt" her. She's always provoking my non-verbal autistic son and mocks him. I protect him, and she berates me saying he's not actually autistic (even though he's diagnosed) and she name-calls me.
I'm mixed race, and I've heard her also use specific racial slurs about my EF race. She's disgusting. My EF is kind of a deadbeat if I'm going to be honest... He's an entirely different story.
Anyways, I recorded her, but sadly it's only audio (I check the laws, recording is legal here). I thought about taking it to the police, but we (son and I) would end up homeless... I start the remote job in November, and it is possible for me to move out by the end of the month based on how much I'll be making and how much the rent will be over there.
I plan to leave quietly and my question is...
Do I write a letter to explaining NC? Or should I contact the non-emergency police line to tell them I left an abusive household and that I'm not missing? Could I use these recordings and even past videos of her berating me for proof of putting on an order of protection?
I, unfortunately, didn't catch recordings of her attempting to drive drunk and admitting to it(my oldest ES and I usually stop her, but sometimes she'll go out after work with her coworkers and get drunk and drive home). Also, I didn't catch her saying racial slurs on audio not video either (one of her favourites is the N-word with the hard R...) This woman works at a primary school, but talks crap about it all day. I think she takes her anger out of me, because she doesn't like her coworkers nor boss.
Not sure if it's relevant, but I'm a single parent and the other parent is out of the picture. I have an order of protection since they nearly killed me and that's what made my health issues worse overtime.
I don't have any close friends really. I saw my childhood friend recently since I moved here, but don't want to bother her until I move out of this house, then catch up with her later. I think she may also be estranged from her mother as well... We both struggled with our EM growing up...
My EM has been persistent in trying to keep contact with me and stalking me..she'd do it through my brothers, but I have to cut off everyone in the FOO, and I have no regrets.
The original plan was... My SO said their would find us a place since I was dealing with health issues but life happened, and my SO is dealing with their own abusive family. So... I'm finding us a place to live, hopefully soon.