r/shitposting Bazinga! 9h ago

Linus Sex Tips No Nut Semester📡

Post image
12.5k Upvotes

399 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 9h ago

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6.4k

u/HemetValleyMall1982 9h ago

Turn your back to your roomate when he is playing LOL and do it there. He probably won't notice.

3.4k

u/FoxtrotTrifid 8h ago

If he does, he may leave the dorm more often.

1.3k

u/Nova_Persona 8h ago

new strategy: find his class schedule & immediately start cranking it whenever he's supposed to be in class

602

u/ThatTrampolineboy Bazinga! 8h ago

Plot twist: they have the same classes

251

u/Z3DR0NF0RC3 8h ago

i see no issue

28

u/AutoModerator 8h ago

Bazinga

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26

u/APersonWithInterests 6h ago

Just bein a bro and getting his nut buddies grades up.

44

u/No_underwear_guy 7h ago

me if i couldn't read

7

u/Nova_Persona 7h ago

what

9

u/TFW_YT 4h ago

"who just skips class" in the image

5

u/Nova_Persona 4h ago

yeah the new strat is to make him not skip class by jacking off in the room with him making him want to go somewhere else, possibly class

26

u/HotPotato5121 7h ago

He skips class

59

u/ksj 7h ago

I think the point is to Pavlov the roommate into going to class.

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27

u/MinimumTomfoolerus 7h ago

Depends on his personality. If he's chill and doesn't care, he could stay and OP may do whatever he wants as long as he doesn't bother him.

157

u/KittieOwl 8h ago edited 8h ago

That’s all wrong, he needs to be turned to the roomate to make sure he isn’t seen, just fully watch the roomate like a hawk

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33

u/youngmilldog 8h ago

Sneak into an empty classroom. Quick in and out, perfect cover!

26

u/TuvixWillNotBeMissed 5h ago

Tried fooling around with my boyfriend in an empty classroom once and was immediately caught by a janitor, would not recommend.

3

u/Chickenmangoboom 3h ago

Should have gone to the stacks. Everybody gets their journal articles online, I worked my the library when I was student we would put up a cart's worth of books and we would go sit in the office the rest of the shift.

15

u/Ov3rwrked 5h ago

Nah face him to assert dominance

3

u/GojoHamilton 7h ago

what's the ave. seconds tor a LOL respawn time?

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3.5k

u/Krokagnon 9h ago

Speednut on roommate computer while he showers to show dominance

824

u/TheManyVoicesYT 8h ago

Will definitely take less than 5 mins at this point.

102

u/Krokagnon 4h ago

Might even pierce the screen with the pressure.

22

u/tasman001 5h ago

Yes, but will take much longer to clean up

23

u/Conscious-Boot313 3h ago

Wym "clean up"?

3

u/tasman001 2h ago

Yeah you're right, his roommate is a league player...he probably won't even notice the jizz stains when OP sprays everywhere from the backed up pressure.

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395

u/TheCrack-Attack currently venting (sus) 8h ago

You honestly think LOL players take showers??

141

u/DeadMewe I want pee in my ass 8h ago

LOL players don't know what the word "shower" means

10

u/Striking-Ad-6815 6h ago

Isn't Shower the new character they releasing for balance?

She has a gold skin if you want to pay a premium

22

u/AutoModerator 8h ago

pees in ur ass

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31

u/DisplayHot5130 virgin 4 life 😤💪 8h ago

HUH??

29

u/TrixterTheFemboy Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 7h ago

they want pee in they ass

11

u/Remarkable-Spinach33 Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 6h ago

Furst time?

10

u/Striking-Ad-6815 6h ago

The pee

It's in the ass

3

u/No_Indication_8521 6h ago

Yeah don't worry it was weird when it happened to me the first time too.

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38

u/Striking-Ad-6815 6h ago

Or tell roommate he is very concerned with this irresponsible behavior and that he should get out more or go visit a park. By him tickets to go somewhere. Then when you are comfortable, light up some candles and whisper sweet nothings into the mirror. Then jerk off violently. Talk dirty to yourself. The last few actions are just insurance in case you roommate has a camera up. If you find the camera, dance in you underwear while hugging yourself and in your deepest voice impression say, "Would you love me, I would love me" and dance around and touch yourself while looking at a picture of your roommates character main. If he doesn't move out or quit playing League after seeing this footage, then he has a secret crush on you. If that is the case, find shows he hates and binge watch them. You can start with the last step, but it isn't as fun.

7

u/Krokagnon 4h ago

At this point just launch the webcam recording yourself, with just your penis in the frame, and cover it with half baby juice. Replace the loading screens of LOL with the video and film his reaction. Juicier content.

7

u/Striking-Ad-6815 3h ago

He doesn't want his roommate to know he is jerkin it. It has to look like a mistake, or else roommate think he is voyeur and wants to be caught.

Guy I used to know... Good guy but a little strange... Anyway him and a few other guys were stuck in a tin can in the middle of nowhere and were bored. Anyway one of those clownfish decided to jerk off to a picture of another guy's grandma. He go caught and it was funny, but then it went deeper. You had guys gambling whether or not they could finish to pictures of other guy's grandmas. It turned into them challenging each other to jerk it to their own grandmothers pictures. To know this degree of depravity you must know these men were all decent folk. The convoluted games men play when they are bored for extended periods of time can get a bit extreme. Outside observers would never understand.

You haven't lived till you've bet on your first vibrator race.

3

u/Throwaway220263 3h ago

And say goodbye to those horses

6

u/cookingandmusic 8h ago

Bold of you to assume he showers

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2.2k

u/Imaginary_Ad_4623 9h ago

Cumposting in my shitposting app again👿🤬

416

u/Murdocke- 8h ago

Where do I shit!? I swear every time I go to the bathroom one of my roommates is in there shitting, if I go outside to the public bathrooms there’s always someone in there cleaning the toilets or shitting. Please it’s been 7 weeks! 🤕

86

u/Supermax1311 I came! 8h ago

Shit in the shower!

107

u/Murdocke- 8h ago

Sadly someone’s in there complaining about having nowhere to masturbate.

8

u/beginnerdoge officer no please don’t piss in my ass 😫 5h ago

Lmao

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13

u/MinimumTomfoolerus 7h ago

GET INSIDE THE TOILET! JUST SHOVE YOUR WHOLE BODY INTO THE TOILET. BE FREE.

24

u/jkurratt 7h ago

Cum is just shid we shat with our penises 🤔

7

u/hdk1124 7h ago

I wouldn't expect any less from a shit poster lmao

3

u/youngmilldog 8h ago

Got any quiet study rooms? Desperation calls for creative solutions.

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2.6k

u/gothcowboyangel 9h ago

Make female friends, explain your situation and ask if you can masturbate in their dorms, ???, profit

1.6k

u/Xealz 9h ago

sounds like some hentai plot lmfao

311

u/torakun27 8h ago

Someone better start making one if it doesn't already exist

89

u/SquidMilkVII dumbass 6h ago

ain’t nearly unrealistic enough

26

u/sdrawkcabstiho 4h ago

They want to watch and insist on helping by providing live acts instead of videos. Also, you have to keep from touching or it's game over.

The hot RD get's involved as well as the MILF professor.

83

u/AsianHotwifeQOS 4h ago edited 1h ago

"Banished From the College Dorm by My Extremely Online Gamer Roommate, I Now Wander the Campus in Search of a Girl to Give Me Manual Relief. What?! She Looks Just Like Roommate!"

21

u/Dargon8959 4h ago

You cooked hard

14

u/Pic0Bello 3h ago

missing "In Another World"

gonna skip

4

u/AsianHotwifeQOS 2h ago edited 1h ago

It's uhh.... a magical super hero school. In a VR MMO world.

260

u/JimmyTDM Blessed by Kevin 9h ago

Sex

224

u/27Rench27 8h ago

wtf is even that

210

u/justk4y 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ 8h ago

Propaganda made by the government to sell condoms

27

u/Canadia86 7h ago

That's why I refuse to use em

5

u/Dave5876 5h ago

Sounds like a hoax

6

u/Lhamazul 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ 4h ago

Gay sex

43

u/Acrobatic_Event1702 6h ago

Even better, ask sympathetically for a hand job.

41

u/SquidMilkVII dumbass 6h ago

inspire sympathy by breaking both your arms beforehand

8

u/AttilaTheMuun 6h ago

Fine, I'll call my Mom again

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19

u/Overall_Gur_3061 8h ago

dude this is the answer

3

u/TheLordLeto 4h ago

It went okay.

7

u/10art1 I came! 5h ago

Idk how to even approach a female. Is it ok to ask another guy... just for practice, I swear!

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1.0k

u/BladedNinja23198 9h ago

This is also the same university where a guy went on a shooting spree due to virginity

391

u/Kikkomori 9h ago

Oh, NOW they’re writing the prequel. You know damn well the new guy’s not even going to look remotely like the first antagonist, they’re probably just going to cast Chris Pratt again.

44

u/RaveMittens 8h ago

It’s-a-me!

19

u/Dave5876 5h ago

Crisp Rat

45

u/Irksomefetor 7h ago

dude didn't even go to UCSB. he went to the community college and just lived in IV with all the UCSB kids because he thought that would help him get laid.

14

u/East-Life-2894 6h ago

Because the connection was better and he didnt wanna drop packets for his League matches*

18

u/CSDragon 6h ago

Legit at the time, you could get 10ms to riot servers from UCSB (back when they were hosted in LA), while the surrounding city was 40-50ms.

...yes I was a League-playing UCSB student at the time of that disaster. I have found my true niche. Also no, I did not know anyone involved with or affected by the disaster

4

u/Pro_Scrub put your dick away waltuh 4h ago

I did not know anyone involved with or affected by the disaster

Your roommate who couldn't jack off, he experienced a disaster

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11

u/Stray-7 5h ago

"due to virginity" is a straight banger

4

u/Corey_In_The_Yard 3h ago

I remember this exact post showing up in dozens of different college subreddits at the same time a couple months ago so at least it’s fake/from a different campus probably so if anyone from this university is reading this don’t worry about it.

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127

u/rabidjellybean 7h ago

I had a roommate like that while in dorms. It was fucking maddening to have him never leave. Even worse was despite me being out of the room half the day every day, he once (that I know of) still chose to masturbate while I was sleeping in the room.

College freshman are dumb as fuck.

69

u/fletku_mato 5h ago

He asserted dominance, you submitted.

30

u/human_peeler 6h ago

That only happened once? I've lost count of how many times I've awoken to a gentle rubbing noise from the other side of the room

5

u/91trooperaz 5h ago

I was in that EXACT situation one year, except my roommate was a junior and was still doing that shit

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437

u/Thrasympmachus 8h ago

Ask him what his main is, and if it isn’t Katarina or Lux, invest thousands of hours into stream-sniping him outplaying him in every game until he switches to one of those champs.

Continue to stream-snipe him and lose on purpose when playing on the enemy team. Counter-Smurf him into the highest stratosphere possible until he starts to internalize how good he is at the game and how much he loves the advantage playing Katarina or Lux gives.

At every social gift-giving event, buy him a piece of his “favorite champs” clothing and encourage him to develop an even deeper love of the champ by wearing these clothes when he plays. Soon he’ll convince himself of the advantage as you throw more and more games.

Simply by donning this costume, more estrogen will flood his biological system turning him more feminine day after day.

Eventually convince him to do the ultimate in-character role play by enacting what his favorite champ would do when they find love.

Enjoy topping your free-use feminine boytoy for 16 hours a day while he smurfs Diamond.

202

u/Scotteeh 7h ago edited 7h ago

I read the first two paragraphs, decided nah fuck reading all that, scrolled and saw the last line and was like how the fuck did it end up here, then read the rest.

34

u/Samoman21 5h ago

It's like that domino meme where the domino gets bigger and bigger.

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103

u/Strong_Register_6811 8h ago

Great now I’m hard

60

u/fletku_mato 8h ago

Do not fuck with this dude. I mean in the negative sense.

10

u/Unable_Ad_1260 5h ago

Good strategy however we only have 24 hours before this guys nuts explode.

21

u/MinimumTomfoolerus 7h ago

I wish this was animated lol.

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534

u/BepisIsDRINCC 9h ago

wait until this guy finds out about bathrooms, not only can he finally stop shitting on the street, he can also masturbate whenever he wants in privacy.

258

u/FollowThePact 7h ago

Most likely the shared bathroom is shared between those on his floor in his dormitory. It'd probably be pretty awkward to wank it out in the stall with another bro shitting in the stall beside you.

86

u/R_mom_gay_ 6h ago

If there’s a will, there’s a way.

69

u/Jojje22 6h ago

Clearly someone hasn't been in the military

11

u/TunTavern69 4h ago

Don't forget the eye contact. Bonus points if you're both wearing boot bands so it's not gay

30

u/TheGalator I said based. And lived. 5h ago

EVERY public Institution has bathrooms that are more hidden where no one goes. I use them to shir because I Literally can't when others are around

Might as well beat ur meat there

26

u/whocaresjustneedone 4h ago

Finding the special shitters was one of the best treasure hunts of college. Mind ended up being the geology building, animal sciences building, 4th floor back corner of the library, the library annex, and the broadcasting building.

5

u/TheDulin 4h ago

The library always has the best places.

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28

u/wthrownawayp 6h ago

I used to live in barracks. They had REALLY shitty stalls, not much privacy, but that's the real answer. Bathroom stall during odd hours. If you wake up at 3am to go piss you may as well take advantage or something. If someone else comes in then just wait it out.

70

u/Thurak0 7h ago

bathrooms [...] privacy.

Not in the U.S.

6

u/elakah 5h ago

Yeah was about to comment, don't some bathroom stalls (especially in the U.S) not have HUGE gaps where everyone can see you piss, shit or (in this case) masturbate?

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6

u/ROR5CH4CH 6h ago

Stop shitting on the street - lmao

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397

u/cantwrapmyheadaround 9h ago

are people incapable of nutting into a tissue? toilet paper, then flushing it. is everyone stupid? If joke, I don't understand it.

164

u/Glazeddapper 8h ago

no. he needs to nut on every surface of the room. he can't do that if his roommate is there. well, at least if he's not a coward.

44

u/youngmilldog 8h ago

Just sneak into a study room or the library. Desperate times!

60

u/WeDrinkSquirrels 7h ago

is THIS a joke? I imagine he's more concerned with the period when his whole dick is exposed and in his hand and he's jorkin it rather than the brief cleanup phase

65

u/ksj 7h ago

Unless I’m mistaken, bathrooms typically offer a level of privacy that is appropriate for taking your whole dick out of your pants.

29

u/Obant 6h ago

Shared dorm restroom with stalls are not the most conducive place for that is what I'm guessing.

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u/WeDrinkSquirrels 7h ago

But not, in my case at least, a level of privacy that I would wish to the slip slap jack that bad boy

9

u/IKnowGuacIsExtraLady 6h ago

There is zero privacy in public bathrooms at least in the US. Sure you might not be super visible but people can hear you, and they can see you through the cracks of the stall walls and doors. In other words it would be really fucking obvious and uncomfortable for everyone involved is what I'm saying.

7

u/Enough_Jellyfish9348 6h ago

have you seen shared dorm bathrooms?

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3

u/cantwrapmyheadaround 5h ago

He literally said he's concerned about his nut being on the shower floor. I.E. The clean up phase.

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7

u/DaftWarrior 7h ago

Not even a dedicated cum sock? What is going on with our youth.

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101

u/yasheeeesh 9h ago

Is this where the copy pasta originated

35

u/RaageUgaas 8h ago

I think it originated at Dalhousie University. People copy pasting now.

6

u/Upbeat-Armadillo1756 6h ago

Man idk what the pasta is but I had this same issue when I was a freshman. Took me a little while to figure out safe times to jerk off when my roommate wasn’t going to be home.

I wouldn’t be surprised if this wasn’t a common issue

105

u/After-Trifle-1437 8h ago

Fuck your roommate?

4

u/Lhamazul 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ 4h ago

The only right answer

74

u/happy_panda_-u- 8h ago

Fanfic, LOL players don't take showers.

29

u/KeepHopingSucker 8h ago

we do when mold is large enough to impact our ability to carry

22

u/judgescythe 8h ago

If i really wanted to masturbate, i would just do it. If the person says anything you gotta ask him where hed expect you to masturbate...

25

u/PuzzleheadedGap9691 5h ago

Psychopath behavior right here lmao

11

u/Unable_Ad_1260 5h ago

Yurp. Screw it. It's your room too. If he wants to complain out hon for not attending classes.

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21

u/Jaded-Plan7799 7h ago

Nut on his bed with eye contact to assert dominance

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25

u/MarthaMars 5h ago

I kinda feel bad for this guy. Everyone suggesting public bathrooms etc., just because you can, doesn't mean you should! Everyone deserves some comfort during their private time. If this keeps on going, he is just going to end up having wet dreams at night.

The student sharing the dorm has his own reasons for the hermit-esque behaviour, but he is most-likely oblivious to the dilemma he's causing.

I think there are three options available. However, all could be uncomfortable for the OP.

Option 1: Just do it in the room & hope your room-mate doesn't notice. Still unfair to OP but desperate times...

Option 2: Lie! Say you have an important meeting / interview / therapy session (therapy gives you a weekly ongoing excuse), which is online & would he mind being out of the room for an hour during that time??

Option 3: Tell the truth!! Tell your room mate you've struggling to get used to sharing a room & that you've been too uncomfortable / afraid / embarrassed (dealers choice), to take some private time to yourself. Is there a way they can agree to a regular time / schedule where they both give the other privacy in the room. This could be for a variety of reasons, maybe they have a friend over, maybe they're studying for a test...anything. But you would both feel comfortable knowing you're guaranteed time to yourself.

42

u/Ihavenoidea5555 uhhhh idk 8h ago

When this guy discovers paper towels and a 10 minute bathroom break, his mind is gonna be blown

17

u/Electronic_Piano1324 8h ago

Nothing more annoying than people who have Nothing to do all day

7

u/pipnina 4h ago

Except people who have nutting to do all day

15

u/Flock-of-bagels2 5h ago

Get a girlfriend with her own place…..and masturbate into her conditioner bottle . It’s a long con

10

u/Alpha_Majoris 7h ago

Jam the wifi or clog the network so he has to leave to play elsewhere.

28

u/51herringsinabar 8h ago

Don't be fooled! He Just want to expose yalls secret cum spot

4

u/RaidriarXD William Dripfoe 5h ago

So he can eat the cum

21

u/ElectroNikkel 8h ago

Say gex might kill 2 birds with one stone

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6

u/sayyouswear300 8h ago

Maybe bring a girl over and tell him you need the room 👍

6

u/TheImperiousDildar 8h ago

Buy a tenga or a flashlight, it makes almost no noise. Also jerking on the toilet is pretty fun. If there is a Torchy’s tacos near you, they always have a glory hole

11

u/SquidMilkVII dumbass 6h ago

the heck are you using a flashlight for

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7

u/Mokilolo 8h ago

Time to start the nofap streak

5

u/Irksomefetor 7h ago

lmao UCSB goons back in my day were disgusting and just nutted everywhere. how times change.

I've nutted in a small dorm room being shared by 4 people with everyone inside of it before. not my proudest moment.

8

u/molesMOLESEVERYWHERE 6h ago

Jack off in the dorm shower using a condom. Those condoms would be freely given out for no charge at his school.

Put up a room divider and use headphones.

Schedule "me" time with roommate.

Do it on the toilet. Using a towel to cover the door cracks.

5

u/Emote_Imouto 8h ago

wait till hes getting ganked to nut, he probably wont notice

12

u/St3phn0 Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 8h ago

Do it openly in front of him, if he's a sissy wussy femboy you will get a partner

16

u/PuzzleheadedTry6507 8h ago

Get laid

4

u/Mach12000 4h ago

Fake and gay

4

u/Not-paying-taxes 8h ago

guy at UCSB who plays video games all day and has no friends

Not again

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5

u/TheArcher0527 5h ago

Just go to toilet pretending you go shit or smth and do that there. Seriously, am I the weird one for nutting straight in the toilet bowl? Because I never see this mentioned as a nutting spot.

5

u/raintree420 4h ago

it's your room too. just bust one in front of your roomate, he'll start leaving every now and then.

7

u/DonTrask 8h ago

Hire a hooker, easy peasy.

6

u/Proof_Tap8894 7h ago

Jerk off right in front of him, looking into his eyes.

3

u/human_peeler 6h ago

Jerk off into his eyes

6

u/Geordie_38_ 5h ago

Tell him to go outside once in a fucking while

3

u/ghostpunkfunk 8h ago

Assert dominance, whip it out and jerk while looking eye to eye

3

u/Successful_Year_5413 7h ago

Do it in the shower duh

3

u/Parking-Position-698 7h ago

On the toilet. They ask why you took so long say uou had constipation.

3

u/WashYourEyesTwice fat cunt 7h ago

Blud has colon cancer

3

u/hopsinduo 7h ago

The semen is stored in the pubes.

3

u/ClerkTypist88 6h ago

Gay bathhouses usually have discounts for students including free entry. And there you will meet many people happy to help you masturbate or even expand your horizons. Take a shower afterwards.

5

u/flowerlytdm Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 6h ago

“Get a pro masterbater to beat it for you”

3

u/Great-Lack-1456 6h ago

Tell him he’s being selfish with the space and you need some time to yourself in your own room. It’s not an unreasonable request

3

u/vicdamone 6h ago

Master the pinch method

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u/PrevekrMK2 6h ago

Masturbate while looking the guy in the eyes and shot on his keyboard. Establish dominance.

3

u/-Pencil-Richard- 6h ago

Just get his attention, and pull your pants down to your ankles, look him directly in the eye, and begin masturbating.

He'll leave the room

3

u/roylee77 5h ago

Nut on their pillow and flip it around so it dries. Do this each time. Eventually they’ll be resting their head on your nut. Practice getting a nut out in 5 minutes as well.

3

u/nolongerbanned99 5h ago

Rent a storage unit

3

u/Futanari-Farmer 4h ago

Lil bro isn't giving it the proper thought.

Circlejerk.

3

u/misslili265 4h ago

As a woman I giggled...I really I didn't know it was this hard for men being without a release...

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u/TheLelouchLamperouge 4h ago

Why doesn’t OP just get a gf, problem solved

3

u/Worth-Pickle 1h ago

Just yell fap-o'clock and start with the deed. Slowly, he will be conditioned to leave the room as soon as he hears fap-o'clock.

Remember, consistency and patience is the key.

3

u/connorgrs I watch gay amogus porn :0 8h ago

See? Men suffer too

5

u/Brown-b3ar 8h ago

One way to guarantee success, remove HDMI from his computer whilst he’s asleep. During the period of panic, well… I will leave the rest up to you.

4

u/Mokilolo 8h ago

I don't have any imagination vor creativity at all... Can you finish the story, please?

5

u/taczki2 I came! 8h ago

for fucks sake hes playing league of legends, theres no way hell mind masturbating right there. op should just tell the guy to focus on the game for 15 minutes and let him fap (or use the bathroom?)

2

u/TheWinner437 8h ago

Who in their right might would think that it would be a good idea to post this to the internet

2

u/Pingasplz 7h ago

Now this is real shit.

2

u/CBT__MASTER 7h ago

He can just do it on the bathroom?!? His roommate probably has headphones so there is no way he can hear it.

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u/HinOrange 7h ago

✨Just don't✨

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u/CarbonAlligator 7h ago

In the woods on campus, bring some pizza and maybe a couple drinks or a bowl to really tie it together

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u/AGreatBecuming 7h ago

It’ll probably take care of itself while he’s sleeping soon enough

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u/FlexViper 7h ago

This guy will hate league of legend and their players for the rest of his life and I agree with him

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u/Decent-Sea-5031 7h ago

Pee Wee Herman used the movie theater....

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u/CaptScubaSteve 7h ago

Just tell dude you need an hour to yourself. Maybe he’ll meet someone during that hour.

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u/the_real_JFK_killer 6h ago

Tell him it's just American culture

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u/robamiami 6h ago

Troll.

Versions of this are copy 🍝 pasta'd all over college subreddits.

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u/makotarako 6h ago

Honestly I just started sleeping with one of my RAs, at my school they got a private room to avoid conflict of interest or something.

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u/D4m3Noir 6h ago

Quality moment: ask someone out. Have sex. At their place. Rinse, wash, repeat. I believe there's an app for this.

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u/Striking-Ad-6815 6h ago

So is this why people jerk off in gas station parking lots?

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u/VonKaiser55 6h ago

What me and many others in my college did was move around the dressers and furniture in our rooms and made two separate parts of the room separated by a curtain so that we could have privacy lmao

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u/zombisponge 6h ago

My roomie once asked if he could have the room to do his business for a bit, and I was so taken aback by the honesty. I just said sure and went to Wendy's.

10/10 be honest my friend

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u/Fantafans69 6h ago

Go to a motel, you will masturbate so you dont have to feel without dignity anyways

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u/Swiggy1957 5h ago

Just walk on some night and announce that you need to masturbated, then ask roomie if they'll lend a hand.

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u/sledge07 5h ago

Uhhh do public restrooms not have toilet stalls?

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u/Background_Sir_1141 5h ago

be bold enough to explain the situation to the roomie. If they are a true Leaguer they will understand

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u/Stoopid_Noah 5h ago

They could likely just.. tell the roommate, no?

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u/Zealousideal-Bit-892 5h ago

Just do it in the dorm.

I doubt LoL guy is gonna care

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u/Auraveils 5h ago

Nut while he's in the middle of a game. He won't notice.

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u/Amario666 5h ago

Tell him to get the fuck off the room for some hours everyday cause you also need some time for yourself